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THE FACTS OF LIFE FOR TEENAGERS 



the 



S T R K 

didn't bring you! 



LOIS PEMBERTON 



FOHEWORD BY WILLIAM A. SCHOWFELD, M.D. 



HERMITAGE PRESS, INC., NEW YORK 



COPYRIGHT, 1948, BY LOIS PEMBERTON 
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. 

No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without 
permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer 
who wishes to quote brief passages in connection with a review 
for an inclusion in a magazine or newspaper or radio broadcast. 



FIRST PRINTING, MAY 1948 
SECOND PRINTING, DEC. 1948 



DRAWINGS BY S. LODJCO 



Manufactured in the United States of America 



Contents 



PAGE 

AN INTRODUCTORY WORD vii 

FOREWORD ix 

1. THE STORK DIDN'T BRING You 1 

2. THE WORDS FOR IT 13 

3. WHAT LITTLE GIRLS ARE MADE FOR 29 

4. WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 43 

5. BIRDS, BEES, AND BABIES 59 

6. SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 81 

7. You, YOURSELF, AND HEAVEN HELP THE REST 

OF Us 99 

8. OH, WOE Is You 115 

9. STOP, LOOK AND LISTEN 129 

10. A THOUSAND TIMES "No" 141 

11. TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 155 

12. CALLING ALL PARENTS 171 
DIRECTORY OF ORGANIZATIONS 185 



An Introductory Word 



Dear Boys and Girls: 

This is not just a book, but an effort to help you through 
a very difficult period when you're assailed by doubts, 
fears, hopes, and illusions on all sides. Such feelings accu- 
mulate mostly when you don't fully understand what's 
happening to you, inside or out. And because of your 
ready sensitivity, you're too shy, embarrassed, or reticent 
to ask ALL the questions about life you'd like answered. 

Growing up isn't easy, nor all the FUN it's cracked up 
to be. Because of ignorance and many misconceptions, it 
may very often be painfully distressing or solemnly fright- 
ening. But through intelligent enlightenment, maturing 
youth can be the fine, exuberant experience it was meant 
to be. For youth must be hopeful and free, in order to 
grow strong and fruitful. 

vii 



AN INTRODUCTORY WORD 

This handbook is also a wish on my part to bring you 
and your parents closer together in the bonds of under- 
standing and friendship. They dread offending you, for 
they remember and appreciate how sensitive you are. So 
they hesitate coming to you with such information till you 
seem ready and signify a willingness and intent to grasp 
the facts and realities of adulthood. And sometimes, re- 
ceiving no signal from you, they wait too long. You find 
things out for yourself; and often the misinformation you 
gather disturbs you more than no information at all. 

Therefore, YOU are the one to seek them out when you 
feel you want to know about yourself. Please do. Mother 
and Dad will feel so much better that THEY were the 
ones to set you straight. They care very much when things 
trouble you, and they can be most helpful about life's 
problems. 

I've tried throughout to avoid the heavy hand and the 
preaching approach to the whole business. I want you to 
read all this in the best of faith for this is cold turkey 
in your own language. 

And sincerely, I hope you'll gain the know-how from 
it, to overcome some serious questions and satisfy some 
troubling doubts. 

With all my very best wishes, 

LOIS PEMBERTON 



viii 



Foreword 



This foreword is addressed to the parents, teachers, 
and counselors of adolescent boys and girls. 

The subject of sexual behavior has always been envel- 
oped in considerable mystery because of the inability of 
adults to face the truth about sex. For this reason, the 
adolescent is confused and comes to associate sexual ac- 
tivity with the duplicity and indecency which lead neither 
to intellectual honesty nor human dignity. This attitude 
will continue so long as sexual activity is dealt with in the 
"current confusion of ignorance and sophistication, denial 
and indulgence, suppression and stimulation, punishment 
and exploitation, secrecy and display" depending upon 
the parents' and teachers' own frustrations or adjustments 
toward sex. 

This book fills a gap in our literature on sex education. 
It presents a wholesome attitude toward many of the sex- 
ual problems confronting society. It is directed both to the 
boys and girls who are beginning and those who are well 
on in pubertal development and adolescence. "The Stork 



FOREWORD 

Didn't Bring You!" is written in the vernacular of today's 
adolescents and yet in a form also acceptable to their par- 
ents, educators, and religious counselors. The reader will 
find nothing in this book which resembles a sermon or 
didactic lecture, nor advice which the adolescent could 
not possibly follow. Lois Pemberton offers honest con- 
structive assistance and encourages the adolescent to think 
out each problem, thereby finding his or her own way 
with dignity and honor. 

Psychiatric studies of adolescents reveal that their most 
serious difficulties in sexual matters are the results of gen- 
eral feelings of inadequacy with fixation on the sexual as- 
pects of the problem, as this is the realm of greatest intel- 
lectual insecurity and emotional pressure in this age group. 
Undue feelings of guilt and erroneous concepts of normal 
sexual behavior also play a role. 

An isolated book, no matter how good it may be, will 
not be effective, nor will it eradicate ignorance unless it is 
a subordinate part of a general educational and training 
program both at home and at school. Such a program 
must be designed to develop an all-around integrated per- 
sonality. Sexual behavior is not an isolated phenomenon 
in an individual's life, but is a part of the general scheme 
of the person's mode of living, his attitudes toward him- 
self and the social world, his ambitions and his hopes. 
Aberrations of sexual behavior are a manifestation of per- 
sonality trends or disorder rather than a cause of person- 
ality disturbance. 



FOREWORD 

One of the important factors influencing the sexual be- 
havior of an individual is the social group to which he 
belongs. Among adolescents this is particularly true. When 
an adolescent is thrown into a group whose moral con- 
cepts are different from his own, difficulties arise, since 
one of the most intense motivations of the adolescent is 
to conform to the pattern of the group. However, the 
adolescent must learn that there are concepts which are 
more important than the approval of the "gang" and when 
his or her ideas of right conflict with that of the group, 
the adolescent must either change the ideas of the "gang" 
or choose another "gang." There must be no compromise. 
To do this, however, the adolescent must have a well- 
established character pattern. 

One phase of this book in which the author stresses the 
importance of diverting sexual energy into "higher things" 
may be open to discussion. Although some workers in this 
field, such as Dr. A. C. Kinsey, state that people cannot 
voluntarily direct their sexual drives into other types of 
activity, we do know that the sex urge may be temporarily 
diverted and that people who have wide interests and are 
busily engaged in constructive activity, have less time to 
think of sex matters than people whose lives have denied 
them this opportunity. There is no question, however, 
that we may accomplish a great deal by training the ado- 
lescent to cultivate constructive and creative interests so 
that he need not withdraw into his shell and become pre- 
occupied with sexual fantasies. Another phase of this 



FOREWORD 

problem is to remove the intense feelings of usually un- 
justified guilt that adolescents experience over whatever 
sexual activities they may have. This sense of guilt, more 
than the experiences themselves, absorbs all of their ener- 
gies and encourages withdrawal into a fantasy world. They 
should be encouraged to find a pattern of behavior ac- 
ceptable both to themselves and to society. 

We are often asked whether one form of sexual behav- 
ior or another is normal or right. The mere weight of fre- 
quency does not make it right because what seems to be 
normal behavior may actually be highly undesirable from 
the standpoint of the individual and of society. The cri- 
teria as to whether a particular form of behavior is right 
may vary, among individuals and cultures, but the ado- 
lescent may accept it as right if he can honestly answer 
that the activity will not hinder his or her own chance for 
a stable family life in the future. 

The adolescent must learn that, as a mature adult mem- 
ber of a community, he must learn to find satisfaction and 
happiness through long-range planning, and not require 
immediate satisfaction of all his impulses. This carries 
with it a need for self -discipline which in itself is a sign of 
maturity. 

William A. Schonfeld, M. D. 
Department of Psychiatry 
Adolescence Research Unit 
College of Physicians & Surgeons 
Columbia University 

xii 




CHAPTER 1 



THE 

STORK 

DIDN'T 

BRING 

YOU 



Al the credit the long-legged bird receives for dropping 
babies down chimneys dates far back to the time he 
was the good-luck symbol of Teutonic Germany. The su- 
perstitious farm folk set up wheels and perches atop their 
roofs in the hopes of attracting storks to nest with them, 
and thereby bring good fortune to their households. Twice- 
blessed was the home boasting both storks and babies. 
And since most every house had its stork-nest near the 
chimney, whenever a birth occurred, the birds on top 
were believed to have bestowed great favor on those below. 
Gradually then, the happy parents began to tell their chil- 
dren the storks had brought them. So the stork yarn was 
handed down from family to family through the centuries, 
becoming rooted in the folklore of all countries. 

Later this charming myth was pressed into service by 
anxious parents who really didn't know how to tell their 
children the "facts of life/' and by still others who deemed 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

it a solemn duty to withhold such facts as long as possible. 
But actually the overall lack of adequate information on 
the subject of human reproduction was the largest factor 
in keeping even the most fundamental sex knowledge hid- 
den in secret, oft-times fearful, darkness until not too many 
generations ago. You may even have heard bird rumors 
yourselves! 

It's all out in the open at last. Today we all know that 
you are the co-operative product of both a father and a 
mother; that your mother housed you as a seed, kept you 
warm and snug inside herself until you were ready and 
able to make an appearance in this world; that a doctor 
was on hand to urge you on, make your mother com- 
fortable, and help you both should anything go wrong; 
that now you're here, your parents feel responsible to you 
and for you, and will till you have a family of your own. 

These simple, wholesome facts we now hold true. By 
learning how they come about, we also begin to under- 
stand their deep spiritual and social significance and to 
appreciate the beauty and dignity attached to human life 
which makes it worth the living. 

How to convey these simple, natural truths in a simple, 
natural way is the big problem and great responsibility of 
all parents. When you consider that they were boys and 
girls such a little while back, it does seem strange they 
find it so difficult to tell their own boys and girls about 
this business of becoming parents. You might well sup- 
pose too, that after nursing you through diapers and high- 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

chairs, measles and dog bites, they'd be relieved to see 
you enter this "growing up" stage. But NO. It almost 
seems as if they deliberately hold off telling you things 
you should know, in the pleasant hope of keeping you 
little a little longer. Actually parents, underneath their 
seeming austerity, are very sentimental people; and while 
growing up is a very normal process which happens in 
everyone's life, they just don't want it to happen in yours. 
Not yet anyway. 

There are a number of very good reasons for such 
parental attitudes, most of which are still bound up with 
the old stork story. But before we approach that, let's see 
if your own attitude stacks up straight. 

A good many of you already know the things that are 
about to happen during the teen ages. Many more of you 
don't. You all should know the changes your body under- 
goes and the new functions it acquires at puberty, before 
they take place. You need also to realize, before you're 
told of them, that these things are natural. They occur in 
every normal boy's and girl's life, and they occur for the 
specific purpose of fitting you for parenthood. There is 
nothing in them to fret or feel guilty about. 

The tendency on most everyone's part is to become em- 
barrassed or emotional when the subject of life and its 
continuance is broached. Or sometimes it's just that no- 
body in a family can relax enough to make with a begin- 
ning, so a simultaneous paralysis of speech sets in, render- 
ing those present hopelessly tongue-tied. All this in turn 

5 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

makes you bashful, unreceptive, even ashamed. You fold 
up like a clam; the air freezes over; and the subject goes 
begging, leaving both you and mother or dad unsatisfied. 
They realize sadly they have probably let you down, they 
worry some more lest you're still in a fog, as you are; and 
the only consolation is that at least the attempt was made. 

You might have made things easier by listening atten- 
tively, instead of hanging your head or losing your voice. 
You could have chipped in with some chatter, making it a 
question and answer session to everyone's relief. 

As it turns out, you're probably still curious; up a tree; 
disgusted. Maybe the thing has been on your mind a long 
time. You wanted to ask a flock of questions; but some- 
how you just couldn't begin. Or maybe you asked so 
many, mom retreated in despair. So now, you'll have to 
hop back to those books again, only they don't explain 
stuff satisfactorily enough either. 

If any such problem exists in your house, you are the 
one who can smooth it out. Revamp your typing exercise 
and apply it: Now is the time for all good kids to come to 
the aid of their parents. If pop or mom becomes unduly 
speechless, that's the cue to assume a responsibility to 
them by helping them answer some questions. Ask them 
whatever you want to know exactly when you feel you 
should know it. An intelligently asked question can rarely 
go unanswered. It warrants attention by its thoughtful 
wording, and elicits a reply without effort. You've seen it 
work in school. Why should it fail at home? 

6 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

In any event, DON'T listen on street corners or hold 
locker sessions, and then try to figure things out for your- 
self. You can't possibly fit all the bits of misinformation 
you'll hear into a working picture of how you got into the 
world. That is a family affair, and deserves to be main- 
tained as such. Since dad and mother put you here, they 
are certainly the ones best qualified to tell you how they 
did the job. Maybe they'll be fresh out of explanatory 
words. In which case you can all head for the nearest li- 
brary, your own biology textbook, or your family doctor; 
and acquire a first-rate education on a strictly private 
matter. 

Maybe you think I'm pretty silly pleading with you to 
do this, just as I'm about to unfold a book on the subject? 
No matter how many books you plow through, there's 
nothing so reassuring or warming as a good, 'close talk 
with the folks themselves about the mystery called life. 
Books like this are merely starters to see you all off in the 
right direction. 

Why should they be necessary? For the answer to that 
we have to go way back into dad's and mom's past. 

They were raised under the guiding influence of par- 
ents and grandparents who were of another age than ours 
entirely. No matter whence they came, their worlds were 
vastly different in custom and conduct from the present 
day. Just how different is hard to appreciate We can only 
imagine. The movies have brought us only the glamor of 
grandma's rustling bustle and grandpa's jacquard vest and 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

dangling watch fob. The realities, hardships, and every- 
day drudgery they faced are all carefully omitted. No, 
grandma's seemingly romantic era was juggled relentlessly 
by fanatic Puritanism on the one side and prudish Vic- 
torianism on the other. Make with the dictionary for the 
exact meanings of those two isms, and you'll be a lot more 
lenient next time you start to yap. 

Dad and mom hit the fringe of the transition from that 
old to our new school of thought and conduct. Their par- 
ents and grandparents staunchly maintained children 
were to be "seen and not heard." When suddenly those 
children reached the curiosity age of puberty, their normal 
questions were shushed, or put off with the fabled bird. 
For sex or anything pertaining to it was unmentionable. 

When grandma's mother was adolescent, girls came 
to womanhood and suffered in silence with their own 
thoughts as to what had happened to them. Boys courted 
them without so much as a kiss before announcing their 
intent to marry. A broken engagement was rare and scan- 
dalous. 

Both met marriage with only vague ideas as to what 
was in store physically or spiritually. And with such up- 
bringing it's doubtful that the resultant false modesties 
and mutual embarrassments of husband and wife ever 
permitted them to express any views on the subject, even 
after years of married life. Their children were raised in 
the same patterns. Thus the mystery of sex and birth re- 
mained hush-hush throughout many generations. 

8 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

All that isn't too surprising when you remember that 
everything about the human body in those days was 
covert. Countless petticoats, corsets, pantaloons, and vari- 
ous other shroudings hid the physical contour from sight. 
Even the glimpse of an ankle was cause for gossip. Conse- 
quently, humans hid from each other to dress, undress, 
and even think; so you can well imagine their states of 
mind and subsequent reactions. 

Again, life itself moved much more slowly which is 
hard to conceive in today's mad rush. There was really no 
time off from living to allot to one's personal self for pri- 
vate meanderings. Everyone was kept far too busy by the 
lack of modern improvements and conveniences just meet- 
ing each day's requirements. 

Let's give a look at some of the contrasts a few short 
decades have already made in our lives. At the turn of the 
century, when "grandma" was a girl: 

Old Dobbin might average a neat five miles per hour, as 
against dad's new Cad at eighty. . . . 

Saturday night jam sessions were strictly ham from the 
family's own vocal cords with pop or mom beating a 
wheezy accompaniment on the old pianola. You flip a 
radio dial or drop a coin in the juke box and it's all done 
for you. 

A new dress was an event, enjoyed after months of 
waiting for material to arrive from the mail-order house 
and then painstakingly pinned and sewn on a foot-pumped 
machine. You hie to the nearest teen section of your de- 

9 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

partment store and pick out a whole new outfit within an 
hour. 

A bath was a once-a-week effort, taking place atop the 
kitchen table in the wooden wash tub. First, you lugged 
the water from a cistern outdoors and heated it in pots 
and kettles on the wood stove which also doubled as fur- 
nace. Poor grandpa chopped the wood to stoke the fire 
which heated that water. You turn knobs on the shower 
to regulate water temperature daily, and it never even 
occurs to you to wonder where that water comes from or 
how it got hot. 

Grandma did her homework in the shadows of a flicker- 
ing candle or kerosene lamp, if she went to school at all, 
that is. You have a special desk lamp with just the right 
watt bulb to prevent eyes train. Turn it out and light a 
candle sometime for comparison! 

The church threw an annual strawberry festival, a New 
Year's watch, and a box supper, marking three gala social 
events a year. You go to movies a couple of times a week 
and attend parties at least once a month, with radio pro- 
grams and comic strips thrown in for added daily amuse- 
ment. 

Had enough to get a rough picture of the differences in 
tempo of the background against which dad and mom 
grew up? Many of their "old-fashioned" ideas as you term 
them, are direct products of the influences of that past age. 

But actually it's all relative. Dad and mother argued 
with their parents about "new" ideas, holding out with 

10 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

their then radical theories, much the same as you do with 
them now. Your children and their children's children will 
grow up to differ in opinion about current trends and 
fancies too. For time necessarily brings change, and 
change imposes conflict between past and present, setting 
up a very normal human resistance toward giving up 
known quantities for unknowns. 

In a recent interview Howard Chandler Christy, creator 
of the famous Christy Girl, sums up the perpetual parent- 
adolescent conflict: "We youngsters used to criticize our 
elders just as young people today find fault with us. It was 
not only their ideas that we criticized but also their clothes 
and their furniture. But some of that furniture we hated 
is bringing big prices today. And, by the way, the clothes 
worn by the girls I used to draw, and which our young 
people laughed at but a year or so ago, are back in 
fashion." 

So just think all that over carefully for awhile, and then 
ask yourself if you aren't more patient with dad's and 
mom's pace in their views on your present conduct. 

And remember too, it has taken the time of several gen- 
erations and countless convenient inventions to do away 
with the petticoats of both mind and body. As they gradu- 
ally diminished, folks began to permit themselves a stray 
thought or two about sex. But it wasn't talked about 
much, still isn't. For you see, it takes a lot longer to release 
the shackles that bind the mind than it does to shed those 
binding the body. But progress is finally showing. 

11 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Many of the old mental quirks remain, though everyone 
now openly and freely admits there is such a thing as sex; 
and also that there is nothing so mysterious about some- 
thing that's been going on since the human race began. 
For life began with the whole idea that male and female 
shall reproduce their own kind. 

There again, is your number one fact. 

The rest we'll face in proper order; and you'll see that 
while your sex relations play an important role in your 
life, they are just another very normal, very ordinary 
function like eating, sleeping, bathing, or going to school. 



12 








THE 
WORDS 



. . CHAPTER 2 



FOR 
IT 



Ee is so jam-packed with things that well just never get 
around to knowing everything about everything. 
However, since sex relations play a title role in everyone's 
existence, we should all be fully familiar with that role in 
order to be completely happy in life. 

To be familiar, then, we must know and be at ease with 
the words the right words and their correct meanings. 
For only then can we achieve a sensible understanding of 
how these words will later apply to our daily lives. 

The word SEX itself carries a good many ambiguous 
connotations today. Actually it means fundamentally no 
more than the basic biological differences distinguishing 
male and female. 

You'll often hear "sex act" and that means the union of 
the male and female for the primary purpose of reproduc- 
tion. Other words for this union are: intercourse (most 

15 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

commonly used ) , coition or coitus, cohabitation and copu- 
lation. 

Adolescence: the period of years between puberty and 
full maturity. The teen ages or gro wing-up years. 

Puberty: the sexual coming of age. The period in a young 
person's life, usually around 12 to 13 in a girl, 14 to 15 in 
a boy, when he or she becomes physically capable of 
reproducing. 

Pregnancy: the condition of the female who is carrying a 
child, sometimes called gestation. It is a nine-month pe- 
riod during which a baby develops in the mother's womb. 
This state is achieved through sexual intercourse, when 
the male or sperm cell meets and fertilizes the female 
ovum. 

Insemination or fertilization: literally sowing seed. The 
impregnating of the female with the male sperm. 

Impotency: occurring in the male only denoting a tempo- 
rary or even permanent inability or desire to have sexual 
intercourse. A physical injury, genital disease, paralysis or 
shock might render a man permanently impotent. While 
alcoholism, excessive mental stress, undue physical or 
emotional strain, or extreme heat (either climatic or 
bodily temperature) are frequent causes for temporary 
impotency. 

Frigidity: corresponding to impotency in the mala. This 
condition in young women is more often mental than 

16 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

physical caused by a misunderstanding or horror of sex 
relationship, fear of pregnancy, shock, or other mental 
aversions which cause a definite physical resistance to the 
male. Unlike in the impotent male, intercourse is still pos- 
sible, but no desire, response or enjoyment is present. 

Virginity: the state of a young girl or boy who has not had 
sexual relations. In girls it is sometimes denoted by the 
unbroken hymen or membrane which partially covers the 
vaginal entrance. Once that constituted virginal proof. 
Today, however, the hymen is often broken away, due to 
the strenuous sports activities engaged in by girls. 

Fertility: the state of being fertile or able to reproduce, 
said of both male and female. 

Sterility: the opposite state. A condition in either male or 
female wherein the sexual organs are barren of reproduc- 
tive powers. 

Sterilization: an operation on the reproductive organs, 
thereby rendering one unable to produce children. Such 
an operation is legally performed only when a person is 
deemed mentally, morally or physically unfit to bear off- 
spring: or when childbirth would jeopardize a mother's 
life. Some state laws require sterilization of insane per- 
sons. Consumptives, tuberculosis incurables, and syphi- 
litics are sometimes sterilized as a safeguard to public 
health, as well as to prevent them from bringing un- 
healthy, maimed or subnormal babies into the world. 

17 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Navel: the indentation on your abdominal wall where the 
umbilical cord was attached. Severed and tied at birth, it 
leaves the spot you probably call your '^belly button/' 

Hormones: the chemical secretions of the ductless or en- 
docrine glands, so called because they pass directly into 
the blood stream. The hormones produce definite physi- 
ological reactions influencing the male- or femaleness of 
the individual. 

Gonads: the male and female reproductive organs; the 
testicles and ovaries, respectively. 

Orgasm: the climax or ultimate gratification in sexual in- 
tercourse. In men, it is the moment of seminal emission. 
In women, satisfaction is signified by the expansion and 
contraction of the vaginal walls. 

Masturbation: the practice of sexual self-gratification. Al- 
most all boys and a good percentage of girls go through 
a period of self-exploration in response to newly awak- 
ened sexual drives or urges. There is nothing really bad 
or "dirty" about this investigation of one's own person- 
it's a quite normal, healthy reaction to puberty. The real 
danger lies in the feeling of guilt its repeated perform- 
ance arouses; for it is a misuse of vital drives and energies 
needed for growing up, and may lead to emotional mal- 
adjustment. 

Adultery: the commission of the sex act between two per- 
18 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

sons either or both of whom are married to someone else. 
Unfaithfulness, nnchastity. 

Rape: the criminal act of forcing a female into sex rela- 
tions against her will. Sexual attack or assault upon the 
female. 

Venereal: pertaining to the sexual or reproductive organs. 

Venereal diseases: communicable or social diseases: syphi- 
lis and gonorrhea, affecting the sex organs, and almost al- 
ways contracted through sexual relationships. It is pos- 
sible, though rarely probable, to acquire either through 
the mouth or an open sore, cut, or skin abrasion. Both are 
highly contagious. A mother infected with gonorrhea may 
give birth to a blind baby during delivery. Syphilis is con- 
genital, meaning that it can be transferred by the mother 
to her unborn child and will appear in the infant either at 
birth or early in its childhood. 

Homosexuality: the physiological, or sometimes psycho- 
logical, state of a person who is attracted to or in love 
with a member of his or her own sex. Each of us possesses 
a store of both male and female hormones, the predomi- 
nance of which determines and influences our sex. Should 
some glandular deficiency or disturbance exist or arise to 
cause an over-production of the male hormones in the fe- 
male body, or vice versa, then we have this condition 
known as homosexuality, manifesting itself in a stimula- 
tion of that person's desires toward another of the same 

19 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

sex. The term homosexual is generally applied to the 
male, who is also often crudely called a "fairy," "pansy," 
"queen," or "queer." 

Lesbian: is the proper name for the homosexual female; 
and lesbianism refers specifically to any abnormal attach- 
ment or excessive affection between two women. The 
word is derived from the Greek island of Lesbos, where 
lived Sappho, outstanding lyric poetess of the ancient 
world. 

The branch of medicine known as Endocrinology, which 
treats of the glands exclusively, is making rapid strides in 
effecting corrections for such conditions through hormone 
injections, thereby enabling homosexuals to resume more 
normal living patterns. Those adopting the attributes of 
homosexuality for purely emotional reasons or due to 
some psychological imbalance require the services of a 
psychiatrist or mental hygienist to set them straight again. 

Bisexuals: those unfortunate few possessing both male 
and female sex organs, making them equally attracted to 
both sexes. A female bisexual, sometimes called an "her- 
maphrodite," can assume all the characteristics and ac- 
tions of the male and at the same time retain her feminine 
appearance, with the same holding true of the male. He 
can marry and produce a family and still find himself 
strongly attracted to another man. These are the twists of 
nature. They occur but rarely in human beings as well as 
in plants and animals. They should neither alarm nor dis- 

20 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

arm you, and you should never, never berate or deride 
such cases in any way. 

Illegitimate: said of children born out of wedlock. A child 
born of an unwed mother is oft-times called a bastard. 
(See Chapter 11.) 

Procurer: one who engages in the reprehensible practice 
of providing young victims for the sex pleasures of others 
at a given fee. A male procurer is colloquially called a 
"pimp" the female, a "madam." 

G. U.: meaning genito-urinary, or V. D. (venereal dis- 
ease ) is a doctor specializing in the treatment of venereal 
diseases or other ills of the genital and urinary tracts. 

WORDS ABOUT GIRLS . . . 

Here, chicks, is a list that you so secretly look up in dic- 
tionaries and encyclopedias when adults aren't looking! I 
suspect that a good many adults are just as guilty when 
nobody's looking particularly when they're getting ready 
to tell you what it's all about. All this secret searching 
seems sort of silly, when these are just ordinary words like 
any others, concerning our daily lives. They've been in 
hiding too long. So let's get them out in the open; use 
them properly on the rare occasions necessary; master 
their meanings carefully; and for goodness 7 sake be able to 
meet them head-on without blushing, stammering, gig- 
gling, or running for shelter. 

21 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Vagina: the canal or passageway leading from the uterus 
to the outside of the body, located between the urinary 
duct and the anus (bowel passage). It's the channel by 
which a baby enters the world; and through which the 
menstrual flow is discharged. 

Menstruation (from the Latin menses, meaning months): 
the periodic discharge of all female mammals, occurring 
in humans once a month. It indicates that all is well with 
the reproductive organs, and that an unfertilized ovum 
(female egg cell) followed by the protective, nourishing 
membrane built up for a possible baby is on its way out of 
the body. 

Menopause: a state of the body shown by the cessation of 
menstruation, occurring generally as a woman nears forty 
or soon thereafter, signifying that the baby-producing 
days are over. 

Uterus or womb: the pear-shaped organ of corresponding 
size in which a baby develops, housed in the abdominal or 
pelvic cavity of the body. See diagrams in the next chapter. 

Ovaries: the two female genital organs or glands, about 
the size and shape of almonds, in which the egg cells 
(ova) are manufactured. 

Ovulation: the period, about fifteen days preceding men- 
struation, during which a single egg cell, or ovum, is re- 
leased from one or the other of the ovaries and descends to 
the uterus in the hope of being fertilized by a male cell. Ac- 

22 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

cording to some authorities, it is believed that only one 
ovum is released from alternate ovaries each month, aver- 
aging a grand total of about 500 ova during the normal 
span of female life. 

Cervix: the opening, or mouth, of the womb connecting it 
with the vagina. 

Fallopian tubes: the twin ducts bridging the ovaries and 
the uterus through which the ova descend. See illustra- 
tions, next chapter. 

The Breasts: are, of course, the mammary glands which 
supply the milk to feed newborn babies. 

Clitoris: the erectile exterior organ, located near the en- 
trance of the vagina. Highly sensitive, it resembles in 
miniature the structure of the male penis. 

Fetus or embryo: the unborn child carried in the mother's 
womb. Medically termed an embryo during its first three 
months of development; a fetus the remaining six months 
of pregnancy. See diagrams of various stages of fetal de- 
velopment in the next chapter. 

Endometrium: the soft, thick padding composed of rich, 
red bloodcells, which builds up in the lining of the uterus 
( womb ) each month just after menstruation , to house and 
protect a possible fertilized egg which might grow into a 
baby. 

Amnion: the air-tight sac which holds the water, or amni- 

23 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

otic fluid, in which the developing embryo lives during 
the nine months of pregnancy. 

Umbilical cord: the rope-like cable of vessels joining the 
unborn child to the mother. It functions as the lifeline 
till birth, carrying food, water, and oxygen to the embryo 
and taking away the waste materials. 

Placenta: the spongy, pad-like point of juncture of the 
embryo-umbilical cord to the uterus of the mother. You 
might envision it as the commissary or food supply depot, 
set up within the mother from which the food, water, and 
oxygen are dispatched via the umbilical cord to the de- 
veloping child. This becomes the "after birth" removed 
by the doctor after the baby is delivered. 

Miscarriage: the failure to carry the fetus the full nine- 
month term to normal birth; or the premature delivery of 
the fetus, occasioned by accident, poor health, fright, 
shock, or some other functional disturbance. A miscar- 
riage may also be self-induced or artificially brought on 
by operation, in which case it is called an abortion. 

Gynecologist: a specialist in female genital disorders and 
diseases. You'll go to him ( or her ) if you have real trouble 
menstruating, or for other organic disturbances. The word 
comes from the Greek gyne meaning woman or female. 

Obstetrician: a doctor who specializes in delivering babies. 
He's the one who takes care of you during pregnancy too. 

24 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

Pediatrician: the baby specialist who'll put junior on the 
proper formulas, prescribe for all his baby ailments, and 
chart his general health till he enters first grade. Then 
you'll go back to your regular family physician. 

WORDS ABOUT BOYS . . . 

Here, fellas, are yours, all in one section so you won't 
have to do any more surreptitious shelf-hopping from 
book to book and back for definite dope on the male 
physique. 

You'll note that both you and the girls have correspond- 
ing genital ( reproductive ) organs and functions, although 
they're in reverse, with yours on the outside and the girls' 
located internally. The interlocking combination of the 
two maintains the unending cycle of human life. 

Testicles: the two male glands in which the sperm cells 
and semen are manufactured. They correspond to the fe- 
male ovaries, and hang between the legs in a sac-like 
pouch called the scrotum. 

Penis: the muscular organ through which you urinate, and 
through which the sperm and semen from the testicles 
and prostate pass into the female during intercourse. It's 
the external counterpart of the vagina. (See drawings in 
the chapter for you. ) 

Genitals: The male reproductive system: testicles and 
penis. 

25 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Erection: the stiffening of the penis brought about con- 
sciously or unconsciously by a rush of blood to the spongy 
tissues composing it. 

Semen: the whitish impregnating fluid containing the 
male sperm which fertilizes the female egg to produce new 
life. It's from the Latin word meaning seed. 

Seminal emission: as the words imply, the ejection of the 
semen via the erect penis from the male. Sometimes called 
ejaculation. This quite often happens, automatically, just 
after puberty, during the night and is referred to as a 
"wet dream" because it is most usually accompanied by a 
dream. Such emissions are merely nature's way of main- 
taining balance in the system; and whenever one occurs, 
it should occasion no alarm. 

Prostate: the gland located at the base of the bladder 
which secretes a fluid that joins the semen, and is thought 
to provide for greater motility and protection of the 
sperm cells. It also helps to counteract and alkalize any 
acidity found in the vaginal secretions which might prove 
harmful to the sperm. 

Vas deferens: the main duct or canal, centrally located in 
the pelvic cavity, connecting the penis and testicles, and 
through which the semen and sperm pass during an emis- 
sion. 

Epididymis: from the Greek epi meaning upon, and didy- 
26 



THE WORDS FOR IT 

mos, meaning testicle. A group of coiled ducts leading 
from each testicle to the vas defer ens. 

Circumcision: the operation of removing the outer fore- 
skin, or prepuce, which covers the penis. This is now re- 
quired by some state medical boards as a safeguard to 
individual health and cleanliness; and is performed shortly 
after birth on male infants. 

Castration: the removal of the male reproductive organs 
( testicles ) which usually results in the loss of male char- 
acteristics, with a marked tendency toward obesity (fat- 
ness ) . It was once the common custom amongst Orientals 
to castrate all male slaves, thereby rendering their women 
safe from advances. Such emasculated slaves were known 
as eunuchs. 

Virility: the state of masculinity or manliness, character- 
ized by both great physical and sexual strength. 

Climacteric: the male menopause usually occurring in the 
late fifties. The desires and ability for fatherhood dimm- 
ish though probably never entirely cease as in the female; 
but the nervous and psychological reactions are notice- 
ably similar in both sexes. 

Prostitute: a girl or woman who engages in sexual inter- 
course for payment. Also called harlot, whore, or trollop. 
It's highly advisable to stay away from them at all times, 
for they are the most prominent source of social disease. 

27 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Now, armed with an adequate sex vocabulary, gather 
round and well put the words in their proper places in the 
following chapters, and see how they affect our lives. Nat- 
urally these are not all the words; but they are the ones 
most generally used and referred to. You'll run across 
others crude ones on washroom walls, whispered or 
shouted by youngsters unaware of their meanings, which 
no printer prints and which aren't to be found in any dic- 
tionary. Nobody knows their origin; and their usage has 
never been sanctioned by society. So you'll do best to ig- 
nore them too, since using them somehow only brands 
you as smart-alecky and ill-bred. 

Be good kids then, and stick to the accepted ones, huh? 




CHAPTER 3 



WHAT 

LITTLE 

GIRLS 

ARE 

MADE 

FOR 



The female of the species throughout all of nature is 
destined for motherhood. That's a trust placed in you 
to be rightly proud of. And somewhere, early in your 
teens, you'll begin an active preparation for this role. Dur- 
ing this span, your body will change, inside and out; and 
so will your moods, till at times you can hardly recognize 
yourself. 

First of all youll notice a sensitivity around the breasts, 
as they begin to blossom and grow. And you'll find your- 
self looking forward to that first brassiere, which is always 
somehow quite an event. Be careful not to bump yourself, 
for a knock around the chest can retard or upset natural 
growth. Get plenty of good exercise to strengthen and 
develop the breast muscles right from the start swim- 
ming is one of the best. Don't despair, or be alarmed or 
unhappy if you go about flat-bosomed longer than your 
best pal. Some girls are just slower than others in this re- 

31 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

spect, and you can't rush nature. Each of us has her own 
natural pattern of development to follow. 

Then your waistline will gallop about a lot. One day 
you'll find it where you want it; the next it's up or down or 
completely disappeared, and you'll look all in one piece. 
Cheer up! It'll get set where it belongs one day and stay 
put. Reason for all this seeming indecision is that nu- 
merous internal changes are taking place. 

Next you'll begin to sprout the dark, wiry, pubic hairs. 
These grow quickly to thick, curly profusion between the 
legs. In the words of one medical authority, they are a 
"sex characteristic; like the feathers on a cock pheasant or 
the mane on a lion, they are so placed as to attract the 
opposite sex. In certain types of glandular disorders, hair 
is absent." You'll probably note, too, the appearance of a 
fine fuzz on legs, arms, and underarms, which thickens in 
time, and which you may wish to remove with razor or 
depilatory when you begin to date the boys. 

Meantime while you're putting up with this, there'll be 
days when you'll hate everybody including yourself. 
There'll be times when you can't turn off the waterworks. 
You'll be so touchy you'll weep if anybody so much as 
looks in your direction, let alone dares to open his mouth. 

There'll be hours on end, when you'll stare into space 
and just drift in a dream world. You'll drive mother and 
dad mad with your pouts and peeves and glooms. Why 
all this? Nobody knows. But everybody passes through it 
and somehow survives. 

32 



WHAT LITTLE GIRLS ARE MADE FOR 

It's natural, though a nuisance. So spruce up! Hang onto 
your sense of humor. When the family rags you and they 
will don't fly off the handle, or drop into the doldrums, 
or go crouch on your couch. LAUGH. At them if neces- 
sary. Laughter's the best of all possible teen tonics . . . 
takes your mind off yourself; keeps the mouth corners up 
and the eyes twinkling. And more surprise, everybody 
laughs with you. 

Right in the middle of all this unwanted confusion, 
comes menstruation. 

The girls in your crowd may call it anything from the 
curse to jailing off the roof; but its proper name is men- 
struation, taken from the Latin menses, meaning months. 

Just be sure to remember when it happens it's a normal, 
necessary function. It's supposed to happen. If it didn't, it 
would indicate that the female organs weren't in proper 
working order. So be glad, then, when it does. Nothing 
about it should make you feel alarmed or upset or "dif- 
ferent" in any way. 

Let's study the doctor's diagrams, and see what actually 
takes place when you menstruate each month. 

Each month the hormones, those special chemical agents 
affecting the reproductive organs, go to work building up 
a soft, thick layer of tissue and rich, red blood vessels 
within the uterus, called the "endometrium." This layer or 
lining is to be used for the protection and nourishment of 
a possible baby. 

At the same time, a single egg cell (ovum) is released 

33 



O 

HH 

53 



CD 

en 
W 
U 
O 
ffj 


w 




WHAT LITTLE GIRLS ARE MADE FOR 

from one or the other ovary, and travels through its Fal- 
lopian tube to the uterus a process known as ovulation, 
taking place about fifteen days before menstruation. 

Now unless this egg cell happens to unite with a sperm 
(male cell) and conception takes place, it continues un- 
interrupted on through the uterus and out of the body. 

So the endometrium, finding no fertilized egg at- 
tached to it, finally collapses with all its tiny webbing of 
blood vessels, and follows the course of the egg through 
the cervix, leaving the body by way of the vagina as the 
menstrual flow. 

As soon as the flow is over each month, the uterine and 
ovarian hormones begin anew their work of preparing a 
fresh lining (endometrium) for the egg of the next pe- 
riod. Thus the entire cycle is repeated approximately 
every twenty-eight days, until one day an egg is fertilized 
and attaches itself to the endometrium to grow into a 
baby which is another story that well take up in a com- 
ing chapter. 

Those are the simple facts concerning menstruation. 
Now let's apply them individually. No two girls will be 
alike in their periods, just as no two people ever look or 
act exactly alike. You may start as early as eleven years of 
age or as late as seventeen or eighteen, though thirteen is 
most usual for girls in this country. Some authorities say 
that hotter climates bring it on earlier. In India for in- 
stance, children mature early and begin to menstruate at 
eight or nine years of age n 

35 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

It may take six months or a year, sometimes even 
longer, before you are established on a regular schedule. 
You may skip a month or so, or you may menstruate ir- 
regularly every six weeks. Just don't worry. Eventually, 
you will settle down to a regular routine of anywhere 
from every twenty-eight to thirty- two days. 

Your period may last from a day and a half only to a 
week or longer, though four to five days is considered 
most normal. 

Even after you're on schedule, any number of little 
things can throw you off. A bad cold can delay you. Ex- 
citement, anger, too strenuous exercise may start you 
way ahead of time, just as radical changes in diet or cli- 
mate, plane or train trips any sort of stimulation can 
influence your regularity. 

The amount of flow depends on each person too. It will 
be heaviest your first and second days, so it's a good idea 
to tone down your activities accordingly. 

WHAT TO EXPECT BEFORE . . . 

You may be one of the lucky chicks who sail through it 
all without any discomfort whatsoever; but chances are, 
you'll experience a few of the following in varying degrees: 

A backache that is not really an ache as much as a heavy, 
beat-up feeling all across your lower back. It goes away. 

Headaches aren't uncommon and they're usually accom- 
panied by a dull, logy feeling. You'd like to just curl up 

36 



A SIDE VIEW OF THE FEMALE REPRODUCTIVE ORGANS 



...... LOWER SPINE 

_^~- INTESTINES 



~\ UTEWS 




SMALL 
INTESTINE 



CERV/X 

FORM IX 

-PUBIC 
BONE 

VAGINA 



RECTUM 



CLITOWS 



WHAT LITTLE GIRLS ARE MADE FOR 

somewhere and sleep it off. Go ahead it's the best thing 
for you. Try taking an aspirin too. 

Cramps can be very severe without being serious, but 
mostly they're just painful enough to be annoying. Don't 
be dramatic about it. Cramps are tough but so what? 
Take a hot water bottle and all three of you lie down. Hot 
tea and some aspirin help a lot. So does ginger or essence 
of peppermint added to a cup of plain hot water. 

However, if the cramps are really bad, check with the 
doctor right away. There may be some obstruction that 
only he can remedy. 

No doubt, you'll feel puffed around the middle a few 
days before, and your breasts will become extra bosomy 
and even a trifle sore. That's all normal too and goes 
away fast. 

You'll be blue and gloomy most likely. You may even 
weep or stew around about nothings. Go ahead, it's all a 
prelude to your period. 

And a pimple or two is bound to pop up. Don't pick it. 
Wash your face often with soap and water, and then 
apply a little camphor, spirits of nitre, peroxide, or any 
other mildly astringent antiseptic. 

CAUTION: SEE YOUR DOCTOR! 

Could be, you're one of the unfortunate few who are 
out of kilter or haven't developed quite normally inside. 
If you find yourself in the following category, tell mother 

39 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

quick, and then both of you hie to the family doc. After 
the first six months or so of menstruation, if any of these 
things still happen, don't wait . . . 

1 If you're completely irregular which means you're 
either very late or much too early. . . . Two weeks or 
more each way would be. 

2 If violent cramps, backaches, and headaches persist. 
This means the really severe ones that aspirins and 
hot water bottles won't relieve. . . . 

3 If your period is too long, and anything over seven 
or eight days would be. ... 

4 If you have too hard a flow or hemorrhaging of any 
sort. . . . 

5 If you notice any discharge between periods. ... By 
this we don't mean leukorrhea, which is a whitish 
vaginal discharge usually caused by over-activity, 
and can be disregarded much as you would a run- 
ning nose when no cold is present. If it's copious, of 
course, there may be something amiss. 

Don't for goodness' sake be afraid or ashamed or ret- 
icent about any of these symptoms. Tell mother immedi- 
ately; and when you see the doctor, don't hold out on him. 
The more you tell him, the better hell be able to help you. 
It may be something very minor, which if neglected could 

40 



WHAT LITTLE GIRLS ARE MADE FOR 

cause serious damage in later years, and perhaps even rob 
you of motherhood. 

On the other hand don't be a sissy or sourpuss. Don't 
molly-coddle yourself and expect sympathy. And don't 
deny yourself regular everyday sports and activities. Some 
exercise is good for you, keeps the circulation circulating, 
and helps avoid the congestions causing cramps. But too 
violent exercises only increase and prolong your flow; so 
don't schedule any strenuous basketball or tennis work- 
outs. Take it easy on the jitterbugging, bicycling, iceskat- 
ing and horseback riding. It's just as simple to substitute 
a picnic, movies, cards or other games when you know 
you're about due. Keep a calendar and chart your dates 
accordingly. Also order a hot chocolate instead of that 
coke or cold malted. 

Exert some common sense, and you won't have to stay 
out of gym or miss a prom; because you can always sit 
out the tumbling-session or a fast lindy without missing 
any of the fun. Go swimming too, if you like. Just stay out 
of pools in consideration of others. Get a little more sun 
on these days. Go in the water, but don't stay in long 
enough to become chilled; and skip racing Joe to the raft. 
He'll understand. The more matter-of-fact about this 
whole business you are, the better the boys will like you; 
for they aren't nearly as perplexed or horrified about men- 
struation as you are probably supposing. 

You can bathe just as often too, in fact even more often, 
than you usually do. A good scrub in a warm tub followed 

41 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

by a brisk rub aids the circulation, besides keeping you 
clean and dainty. However, don't duck under an icy 
shower or plunge into a parboiling bath, and expect no ill 
effects. Too hot water increases your flowtoo cold may 
stop you altogether. 

Shampoos are okay too. Just be sure to dry your head 
quickly afterward and avoid the drafts, and of course 
don't go out with a wet head. 

Get a little more sleep than usual and drink lots of 
water. Keep your mind off yourself, and you'll stay happy 
and off the shelf. After all, this is something that goes on 
throughout the major portion of your life, so you might as 
well accept it sensibly from the start. 

One last word: pick the brand of sanitary napkin that's 
most comfortably suited to you. Naturally you'll change 
as often as possible during school hours and throughout 
the day. Use a cologne, deodorant powder, or paste on 
them for added protection against offensive odors. And be 
ever so sure your hands are clean to avoid any possible 
infection. If you think the newer tampons are for you, 
then please see mom and the doc about them before you 
go ahead and try to use them. 

So that's all there is to it. Just remember to guard the 
disposition. Be your same, sweet, likable self every day of 
the month with absolutely no time off for "conditions." 



42 




CHAPTER 4 



BOYS 



ARE 

MADE 

FOR 



Settle down, Joes, this is for you. 
They say it's a "man's world"; and so it is, once you 
get there. But the getting there is rough, and boys DO 
seem to have a tougher time arriving than girls. Mainly, I 
think, because the physical changes aren't as apparent 
until they actually happen. Consequently, they don't pro- 
voke the conversation and need for explanation that ac- 
company the externally visible changes in girls. 

Anywhere from about fourteen to fifteen years or later, 
boys begin to mature sexually in preparation for the fu- 
ture role of man and father. Just as the girls do, you'll 
have your moods and moments of not liking yourself or 
anybody, of giggles and hysteria, of being misunderstood 
and wanting to run away. Be assured right now all that 
passes in due time. 

Look around you. Bill, your best pal, has suddenly be- 

45 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

come head and shoulders taller than you, causing a very 
sensitive rift in your mutual relations. Johnny, your next 
best, has gotten almost as wide as he is tall, which makes 
him shy away from everyone and wince at wisecracks. 
While you still look and feel like a shrimp; or maybe it's 
vice versa. But anyway, everybody you know is changing. 
So cheer up, you're all in the same boat together and 
you'll soon come ashore. 

This is just nature at work, with the endocrine glands 
geared to peak production in making you over into a man. 
Before they all level off to even tempo, you won't know 
just what to expect next. Since no two of us are exactly 
alike, it is therefore reasonable to assume that our growth 
patterns will differ just as radically in arriving at the goal 
of manhood. So get a kick out of it, instead of that inferi- 
ority complex! 

If your ears suddenly make you resemble a loving cup, 
you can be sure the pituitary gland worked overtime, but 
in a short while the others will catch up, and your physi- 
ognomy will re-establish its balance again. 

Let's look seriously now at all the changes taking. place 
within your body in the various orders of their importance. 

You'll awaken one fine morning to find a soft, curly 
growth of pubic hair decorating your chest, underarms, 
groins, and if your family is inclined to hirsuteness, even 
the loins, legs, and arms. Soon thereafter, the fine downy 
fuzz, which later produces that "five o'clock shadow," will 
begin to beard your face; and dad's razor will be subject 

46 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

to sneak attacks. You may resent, but you'll secretly enjoy, 
the jokes hurled at you; for the advent of owning your 
own shaving gear is a cherished milestone in the memory 
of every boy and his parents. 

Next your voice will start slipping and sliding up and 
down, scaling the octaves like a trombone player's prac- 
tice session. It can't be helped. Control of pitch comes 
only with full growth of the larynx. That's the wedge- 
shaped box perched atop the windpipe (trachea) contain- 
ing the taut vocal cords which are strung across the 
thyroid cartilage, better known as your "Adam's Apple." 

As the larynx grows in size along with the rest of your 
body, the vocal cords lengthen and strengthen; and in 
the process you lose all control, which causes the gamut 
of sounds, from deep bass booms to shrill soprano 
screeches, to come out in spite of your feelings. Little by 
little, everything gets organized, and whatever pitch your 
voice is to be, it stays put. The larger the larynx, the 
deeper the voice. Although we know it to be the handi- 
work of the thymus gland, there is as yet no known way 
of controlling the larynx's growth and stopping it at your 
choice of voice. Deep breathing and glee club practice 
help you keep your mind off it, and the exercise derived 
through both develops the voice considerably. 

Meantime other hormones operating within the male 
gonads (testicles) are extra active, awakening the sperm 
cells to life, and manufacturing their surrounding semen 
which renders you capable of fatherhood. Unlike the 

47 



THE LARYNX OR VOICE BOX 




HYO/D BONE 



ADAMS APPLE 

VOCAL CORDS IN 
THYROID CARTILAGE 

CRICOTHYR01D MUSCLE 

(06 HIGH C PRODUCING 

TRACHEA 



EPIGLOTTIS 

fALSE VOCAL CORP 
TRUE VOCAL CORD 
TRACHEA 

RtM OF CARTILAGES 
WITHIN VOICE BOX 

The vibration of the cords produces the various voice sounds. Until they reach 
all growth, you'll be apt to screech when you mean to growl, and vice versa. 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

limited supply of female ova, the sperm cells abound by 
the millions in each drop of semen in which they live. Al- 
though microscopic in size (a mere 500th of an inch in 
length ) , they are extremely active, kept constantly in mo- 
tion by long, lashing tails which propel them at a great 
rate of speed. 

The profuse supply of male life cells is another of na- 
ture's assurances that at least one of them will fulfill its 
destiny in union with a female egg to produce a baby. 
When we understand that a single sperm cell lives no 
more than a fraction of a second, unless it is maintained 
at a specific temperature throughout its journey to join 
the female cell, and that it must meet with ideal condi- 
tions in the female for fertilization, then the vast num- 
bers produced don't seem so overabundant. 

As it is produced, the sperm-laden semen flows from 
the testicles, through small exit ducts composed of nu- 
merous coiled cells called the epididymis, into the vas 
deferens (the main canal) located in the pelvic region be- 
tween the groins. Here it is joined by other secretions 
from the prostate gland. And here it waits till the penis 
is ready and able to eject it from the body. 

The building up or manufacture of sperm and semen is 
an unending process from puberty to the male menopause 
(climacteric) somewhere along in the fifties or early 
sixties. Male virility lessens after the climacteric, though 
sexual desires and activity never entirely cease. 

As it collects in the vas deferens, from time to time, the 

49 



THE SPERM CELL 



PERFORATOR 




}CENTA10LES 
SPIRAL THREAD 



MITOCHONDRIA 
SHEATH 



TERMINAL DISC 



SURFACE 
VIEW 



MAGNIFIED VIEW 



Living by the thousands in each drop of semen, the sperm 
cells are highly mobile, kept constantly in motion by their 
long, lashing tails. 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

semen exerts a pressure and must be thrown off at regular 
intervals either voluntarily or unconsciously by nature 
herself. This process of seminal emission corresponds to 
that of ovulation and menstruation in the female; and is 
nature's way of relieving sexual tension in the bodies of 
both. 

Thus, sometime soon after you note the first pubic 
hair growths, you'll probably be awakened in the night by 
your first seminal emission. While it's surprising in its 
newness, it should cause you no alarm. Nature is merely 
taking care of you. Pressure from the collection of sperm 
and semen gathered in the central canal has notified the 
body that relief is urgent; so while you sleep, that relief is 
effected. The penis becomes erect, and the fluid is dis- 
charged, leaving only a small, damp, whitish spot on the 
bedding or your clothing. The experience may not even 
awaken you, or it may be accompanied by a dream hence 
the common expression "wet dream." In such a dream 
you're probably the hero abducting the heroine in that 
movie you just saw, or maybe you're talking to that pretty 
little blonde, recently moved next door. Just don't let this 
very natural happening disturb your peace of mind. 

If, however, nocturnal emissions occur too frequently, 
something may be berserk in your system. Consult dad and 
go see the doc about it. But first do a little personal re- 
search. It just may be that your bedding is too heavy or 
your sleeping garments too tight, which you can adjust 
for yourself. 

51 



THE MALE REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM 

BLADDER 
SEMINAL 




PUBIC BONE 

PROSTATE GLAHD 
PENIS )N ERECTION 
SPERM DUCT 



PENIS AT KEST 



BLADDER 



SEMINAL vestae 



SPERM DUCT 
PENIS 



SCROTUM 

The semen, manufactured in the testes, passes through the 
mass of coiled cells (epididymis) into the sperm duct, to collect 
in the seminal vesicle. Here it waits until the erect penis can 
eject it from the body. 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

Along about now and perhaps throughout adolescence, 
another source of almost constant embarrassment to you 
will be daytime erections which may or may not culmi- 
nate in emissions. But they will come about voluntarily or 
for no obviously apparent reason. They could be a direct 
or indirect result of too much woolgathering, too many 
love stories, romantic movies, overexcitement, physical 
contacts while swimming or dancing ... or just any num- 
ber of things that prompts your mind to concentrate on 
yourself or sex. You needn't be shy or embarrassed or 
guilty about these erections, because nine times out of 
ten, they go unnoticed by those around you. You can help 
avoid them, however, by keeping busy with sports, stud- 
ies, or "the gang/' 

After the eventful first emission, youll more than likely 
be quite curious about yourself, and want to compare 
notes, literally and figuratively, with the other boys. It's 
a natural enough feeling. 

In your new awareness to life, youll observe more in 
school locker rooms and showers. And the differences you'll 
see are vast and varied. Some boys will have more hair 
growth than others; some larger testicles; some only one; 
some, though rarely, none at all. The gonads, as you've 
already noted, hang in a pouchy sac (the scrotum), one 
slightly above the other for your comfort and conven- 
ience, as well as for their protection against chafing and 
bruising. In winter they'll draw up nearer the body for 
extra warmth; in summer, they relax and hang lower. And 

53 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

for both winter and summer sports your coach will most 
likely tell you to wear a support or jock strap to avoid any 
possible injury or strain. 

The boy with only one testicle may look and feel lop- 
sided, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with him. 
Normally, just before birth the testicles descend from the 
inguinal canals in the groins to their usual place outside 
the body. This is another of nature's ingenious engineer- 
ing feats, for were the sperm cells to remain inside the 
body, the intense internal heat would impair their pro- 
ductivityjust as any extreme heat ( climatic or body ) can 
lessen their fertility. Quite often, however, one testicle re- 
mains inside; and sometimes both will remain unde- 
scended, requiring surgery, endocrinology, or glandular 
therapy to be freed. In neither case is the boy's potency 
or virility disturbed, but either case may be cause for ster- 
ility. ( See your vocabulary. ) 

Along with this sort of looking and comparing notes, 
you'll also do some listening; and what you hear won't 
always be sound. Check on some of those tall tales before 
you believe them. Go ask dad, doc, a teacher, your pastor 
or priest, or any older person you have faith in, if some- 
thing you hear really troubles you. They know and they 
care about your welfare. They can set you straight where 
a book might not because it can't talk back to you. 

Suppose you are tempted to masturbate. You're often 
just as tempted to poke Junior Jones in the eye; but you 
control yourself, at no great cost to your pride. Sex and 

54 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

temper are pretty much the same in this respect they 
both need to be kept under control. For in comparison to 
the good and worthy things in life, neither excessive mas- 
turbation nor temper is profitable to your well-being. In 
a forthcoming chapter, we discuss the problem of ha- 
bitual masturbation and analyze its effects on the boys 
and girls who indulge. 

A lot of you have the idea that you must have at least 
one sex experience in order to prove your new manhood. 
That's like saying youVe got to stick your hand into the 
fire to prove that it's hot. Obviously, neither act is neces- 
sary. 

And I want to squelch two more erroneous ideas that 
have traveled teenage grapevines for decades both of 
which through their own contradiction are equally fool- 
ish. One: that it is healthy for boys to exercise their sex 
organs through masturbation or intercourse. Two: that 
habitual masturbation leads to insanity, blindness, or 
other similarly frightening fates. Your own common sense 
will tell you to chuck both rumors as nonsense. 

However, masturbation continually practiced may lead 
to future emotional maladjustments by developing an un- 
healthy sense of guilt. While covert sex engagements with 
older girls and prostitutes usually contribute only grief in 
the long run. 

Since we all want the most from life, it's safer to abide 
by its rules if we expect to reap the full rewards. Nature 
takes good care of youthful urges and needs. The big job 

55 



THE STORK DIDN T BRING YOU 

for you to learn is control of the mental, physical, and 
emotional reactions to the point where you're well- 
balanced and not lopsided. 

Try to look ahead of your immediate desires they're 
biologic urges born of confused, youthful fancies and im- 
maturity. And small wonder you feel confused . . . 

Now that you're almost adult, you'll discover in a hurry 
that doing what comes naturally is reserved only for the 
children! Your actions and reactions, heretofore governed 
largely by the simple, easy laws of nature, will henceforth 
fall under the man-made rules of our present civilization. 
The cultural influences prevailing in our times: the radio, 
Hollywood, high-powered advertising, contemporary lit- 
erature, even your schooling will all begin to exert their, 
as yet unknown to you, pressures to which you must ad- 
just. These are the social and economic handicaps and 
conditions handed to each succeeding generation by which 
it tests its new mental and physical strengths. Once you 
understand the advantages of the grownup social struc- 
ture, the less likely you'll be to rebel at all the seeming 
restrictions. 

But with the advantages of maturity, the rewards re- 
main as nature intended. You've been given a trust fund 
of happiness for life in your children-to-come. You can't 
afford to squander any of that wealth now. Keep active in 
sports, stay social with the family, mingle with the crowd 
anything to make you a well-rounded human being and 
to keep you from brooding constantly about yourself until 

56 



WHAT LITTLE BOYS ARE MADE FOR 

you're ready and willing to raise a family. Then you'll pick 
the right girl at the right time under the right circum- 
stances; marry her and establish your home. Which is one 
of the best of all reasons for being on earth. 



57 



CHAPTER 





Here comes "The birds, the bees, and the flowers" that 
reliable old cliche that many a parent falls back 
upon to get across the facts of life! A better builder-up 
couldn't be found, but as a substitute for factual informa- 
tion on the most important subject in your life right now, 
birds, bees, and flowers won't suffice. 

Since we're not striving to be different, we'll borrow 
the phrase again, but simply to illustrate that throughout 
all of nature, it takes the union of male and female to re- 
produce another . . . probably the only case on record 
where one and one equal three. 

All plant-life, trees, and flowers require cross-pollination 
( a carrying of the male elements to the female ) executed 
by the wind, bees, and other insects, or helped by man, 
for perpetuity. Insects and most aquatic life require ferti- 
lization of their eggs by the male after the female has laid 

61 



THE STORK DIDN T BRING YOU 

them, while birds and fowl are inseminated by the male 
before the female lays her eggs. All these lower forms of 
life multiply rapidly and in profusion, for they exist by 
nature's law of survival of the fittest. 

But for the mammals, whose highest form is the human 
being, nature has taken greater precaution against loss or 
impairment of the young. So in all mammals, the female 
egg is fertilized and the embryo carried within the body 
until it is strong and sturdy enough to enter the world. 

In animals, the term for procreation is called breeding 
or mating; in humans, intercourse. Thanks to modern sci- 
ence "artificial insemination" is now also possible desir- 
able to many married couples when the husband is ster- 
ile. To animals, mating is instinctive, taking place at 
specific times when the female is "in heat" ( corresponding 
to the menstrual period in the human female), and her 
body is prepared and ready for conception. To humans, 
mating is or should be voluntary. And because such is the 
case, nature has had to pit wits against man's intelligence 
and his economic resistance to bearing and raising chil- 
dren. She has, therefore, made the human mating process 
pleasurable to assure its repetition and thereby gain her 
own posterity. 

For animal and human the process of fertilization of the 
egg and birth is the same, with only the time elements 
differing. 

In each, a short period of getting ready precedes the 
actual union. Animals will sniff and cavort and even fight 

62 



EARLY MONTHS OF PREGNANCY 



uj 




The fetus floats comfortably in its water-sac (the amnion) attached to 
the mother by the umbilical cord. Food, water, and oxygen pass from the 
placenta through the cord to the fetus; and waste matters are given off in 
return, to be disposed of in the mother's body. 



BIRDS, BEES AND BABIES 

each other. YouVe probably all seen cats and dogs about 
to mate. Humans will kiss and caress, lying comfortably 
in each other's arms. This gives nature time to prepare 
both mates, so that the female organs will be ready to re- 
ceive and house the sperm, and the male will be able to 
eject the life-giving cells. 

Once all is in readiness, the erect penis enters well into 
the vaginal tract of the female. Shortly thereafter ejacula- 
tion ( orgasm ) takes place, during which the sperm-bearing 
semen is ejected against the cervix to pass into the uterus 
and on into the tubes where it may meet the female egg cell 
and conception will follow. 

That is the simple, universal process for all human and 
animal kind in the begetting of offspring. 

Sometimes the egg cells fail to unite, hence the neces- 
sity on nature's part for repetition. Sometimes they do, 
but the baby cannot for various physical reasons be car- 
ried the full term to birth. Such a failure to reproduce is 
called a miscarriage. 

We're concerned now about what takes place when the 
cells do succeed in uniting; and because we're more in- 
terested in ourselves than the birds and bees, well con- 
fine the rest of this to human babies. 

The fertilized mother-father egg attaches itself to the 
womb-lining (endometrium) which builds up new and 
fresh for just that purpose prior to menstruation each 
month. The cervix (opening between uterus and vagina) 
contracts to form an airtight envelope for the newly im- 

65 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

planted embryo. A second sac wraps about it, which fills 
with the waters in which it will float, safe from jars and 
jolts encountered by its mother, till birth. This water-sac, 
called the amnion, comprises the bulk of the weight a 
mother gains during pregnancy. 

With the sealing of the cervix, thus guarding the en- 
trance to the uterus, menstruation usually ceases, although 
there may be a slight discharge during the first and even 
second months. 

For the next three to four months the entire female 
body undergoes radical chemical changes, as all action is 
centered on nourishing and building the new life growing 
within it. This period is frequently accompanied by 
nausea, dizziness, headaches, backaches, and mental ad- 
justments; all of which can cause a young mother, and 
father too, much discomfort, but does not disturb the de- 
veloping babe one bit. 

At first the embryo is just a microscopic mass of cells 
and blood vessels clustered in an intricately minute ball 
which increases slowly in size as oxygen expands it, so 
that the actual organic formations of heart, lungs, and 
stomach can take place. The stomach, mouth, alimentary 
tract, and digestive apparatus come first, rapidly followed 
by the formation of a heart, circulatory and nervous sys- 
tems ... for food, water, and air are the prime requisites 
of life in all forms. By the end of the sixth week, the em- 
bryo will have developed arm and leg buds, and being an 
aquatic dweller (remember it's enclosed in a sac of water) 

66 



BIRDS, BEES AND BABIES 

it has a tail! At the beginning of its third month, the fetus 
will look more like a human being, having acquired a 
flexible, bony framework interwoven with muscular fibers 
that pull it into a definite shape. Lastly comes the outer 
skin, nail, hair, and teeth formations. Its over-sized head 
soon topples onto its "pot belly" where it rests until the 
baby is born. Take a look at the various stages of develop- 
ment during its nine-month incubation, on the next page. 

By the end of the fourth month or early in the fifth, the 
fetus awakens and stirs into life. This "quickening" is no 
more than a slight quiver at first, but develops into full- 
fledged kicks as it moves about to strengthen its new- 
found muscles. While somewhat disturbing to carry, 
the gymnastic babe is fascinating to watch. You can ac- 
tually see it move; tap it and see it jump; quiet its antics 
with pats. You really get to know it before it's born. It's 
all pretty wonderful and amazing, isn't it??? 

Beyond the fifth month till the ninth when it's due to 
arrive unless, of course, it's premature the baby grows 
larger and stronger. And the mother will expand more 
and more. Although the average newborn infant usually 
weighs only six to eight pounds, the mother will put on 
anywhere from twenty to forty pounds carrying it. This 
weight, as we mentioned earlier, is mostly the water in 
which it floats. 

When its time is up and it is ready to be born, the baby 
makes a complete turn within the womb, and points its 
head toward the mouth of the uterus which opens into 

67 



EMBRYO DEVELOPMENT 




HEART 



BODY-STALK 



YOLK-SAC 




The amnion is cut away to show growth during the second to 
sixth week. The embryo is mostly heart and yolk-sac, containing 
fatty substances which it gradually absorbs as nourishment. 
From the fifth to sixth week there is a semblance of a head, 
arm and leg buds, eyes and ears; diminished yolk-sac, with heart 
still most prominent. 



FETAL STAGE-About Two Months 



UMBILICAL *CORD 

TOES 

LEG 




The human form becomes established. The face begins to de- 
velop on its large head; eyelids, nose, lips, outer ears, and cheeks 
form, with evidence of a neck which will gradually lift the head. 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

the vaginal canal. The water sac in which it has floated 
nine months bursts, and the downward surge rushes it 
into the passageway, lubricating it for its exit as it goes. 
Thereafter, the powerful muscular expansions and con- 
tractions of the vaginal walls push it on out into the 
world. This process, known as "labor," can take from an 
hour to a full day or more, depending on the physical 
structure and condition of the mother. 

Years of medical research have brought forth modern 
maternity hospitals, new delivery methods, specialized 
prenatal care, and pain-relieving drugs reducing the once- 
dread dangers of child-bearing to a minimum, as well as 
eliminating the fears of motherhood which were so preva- 
lent in "grandma's" day. Today's mother can look forward 
to having her baby in almost complete mental and physi- 
cal comfort. "Labor pains," similar to your menstrual 
cramps, though much more intense, usually presage the 
event, coming at regular intervals many hours ahead and 
increasing in speed and severity just before birth. These 
your obstetrician can quiet with his choice of the many 
new drugs now available. 

Once the baby comes in contact with the new world, it 
utters a gasping cry as the air is forced into its lungs and 
they adjust to the pressure of its strange, new surround- 
ings. The umbilical cord which attaches it to its mother is 
quickly severed and tied by the doctor; and there you 
are ... another human being who looks "just like his 
father." 

70 



BIRDS, BEES AND BABIES 

But wait a minute suppose, you say, it's twins? Could 
be. I always remember the story my doctor tells on him- 
self, with relish, when that question arises. Very early, he 
explained to his own small fry all the facts of life without 
benefit of the stork. Junior accepted the story as gospel, 
and was well satisfied until the day he visited one of his 
father's patients and a close family friend, shortly after her 
twins arrived. This being his first actual contact with new- 
born babies and first impressions being what they are, he 
just couldn't make his father's careful explanation of birth 
fit the situation. In his small groping mind, dad became a 
sort of Baron Munchausen who told tall tales to small 
boys. A baby his father had said, and here were two. 
Weeks afterwards, when the shock and disbelief subsided, 
the tale was retold with necessary ramifications to include 
twins, triplets, or even more. 

So twins are no novelty. They are thought by many to 
be hereditary on the mother's side of the family, and to 
occur most prevalently every other generation. Science 
has as yet no explanation for the mystery as to why twins 
run in some families and not in others. But we all know 
what takes place in the reproduction of twins and multi- 
ple births. 

There are two kinds of twins: identical and fraternal 
sometimes called common or unlike twins. Identical twins 
are always of the same sex both boys or both girls, and 
are usually exact duplicates of one another. They grew 
from the same ovum or egg cell, fertilized by one sperm 

71 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

cell. You're all familiar with the cellular division of the 
amoeba and other simple life forms from your biology 
classes. Well, in much the same way this human egg cell 
grew, doubling in size, and then strangely divided into 
two separate and distinct embryos instead of just con- 
tinuing its usual cell division to make the one baby. Thus 
we see readily why identical twins are called identical, 
and are so much alike in looks, thoughts, and action; and 
are almost always devoted and inseparable. They were 
one life at the start. 

In the case of Siamese twins, the single fertilized egg 
cell began its regular process of division, became two 
embryos instead, but failed to separate completely, re- 
maining joined forever by a slight cartilaginous bridge at 
some point on the body back, side, or even front. The 
original Siamese twins, from whence the name derived, 
were Chinese males born in Siam. They were joined by a 
fleshy band connecting their navels; and they lived to be 
63 years old. Unfortunately such babies cannot be cut 
apart. If one dies the other must follow soon after, for 
they share the same nervous systems. 

Fraternal twins, however, may be of either or the same 
sex, as alike as identical twins or unlike as night and day. 
For they are the result of the fertilization of two individ- 
ual egg cells by two individual sperm cells. Contrary to 
the generally accepted belief that only one ovum de- 
scends from an ovary at a time, in the case of twins two 
have appeared and are fertilized, two amnions form, two 

72 



THE BABY IS BORN 




A Note how the water-sac distends toward the cervix when the 
baby is due to arrive. 




B When the water-sac bursts, the downward rush of waters helps 
force the head into the birth canal (vaginal track). 




C Once the head is completely out of the body, the 
doctor manipulates the rest of the baby out into the world. 




D Here he is! After his first cry, the umbilical cord still attached to the mother 
is quickly cut and tied. His abdomen is then tightly bound, and within a few 
days the stump of the cord drops off, leaving its trace in the "belly button." 



BIRDS, BEES AND BABIES 

placentas are established to house and nourish each, and 
the two embryos grow side by side as two entirely sepa- 
rate entities. The same process applies to all multiple 
births triplets, quads, quintuplets. Three, four, five, or 
possibly even more ova descend into the tubes at once, 
are inseminated by the same number of sperm cells. Each 
one attaches itself to the endometrium and the miracle of 
gestation continues individually for all. 

However, except for twins which are quite common, 
three or more babies are usually born prematurely and do 
not all survive. It is easy to imagine the difficulty one 
mother would have providing adequate building materials 
and growing room in equal measure to so many at once. 
So usually only the fittest survive, though science now 
gives them all a more than equal chance. 

Miscarriages and premature births are generally the ex- 
ceptions rather than nature's rule. The first term is used 
in reference to failure to carry the embryo beyond the first 
four months of conception. Such failure may be caused by 
a physical weakness on the mother's part, a severe shock, 
accident, disease, or general run-down condition, which 
when corrected need not hinder other future deliveries. 

The premature birth, anywhere from the fifth to ninth 
month, may occur for any of the above or more reasons: 
the egg cell may have been imperfectly fertilized, giving 
the baby a bad general start; it may not have securely at- 
tached itself to the uterine walls and been pulled loose of 
itself or through a fall by the mother, or some other such 

77 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

accident. Whatever the reason, the fetus under seven 
months has little chance to live. While he resembles a real 
baby, his heart, lungs, and other vital organs are not yet 
strong enough to survive the radical changes he en- 
counters in the outside world. Beyond that time, he 
might, indeed he most often does, live and flourish like 
any other normally born child. For motherly incubators 
now provide comparable body heat and moisture, while 
science has developed frequent feeding methods simulat- 
ing that of the mother's own body, thus giving the pre- 
maturely born baby or babies every opportunity. We hear 
more and more of multiple births these days than medical 
history has heretofore recorded, but perhaps we ought to 
credit that more to the fact that news travels much faster, 
and modern science kept thus alerted, is more and better 
equipped to keep such babies alive. 

Caesarian births, so-called because Julius Caesar was 
supposedly brought into the world that way, require sur- 
gery, removing the baby through the abdominal walls. 
Sometimes the pelvic bone structure is too small to permit 
the normal passage of the baby through the vaginal canal. 
Or perhaps the mother's strength is too spent to undergo 
actual birth, or she may have contracted a disease or en- 
countered an accident. The marvel of modern surgery 
makes it possible to deliver babies posthumously (after 
death of the mother) by Caesarian operation. Most Cae- 
sarian babies are perfectly normal, live and grow the same 
as any newborn infant. 

78 



BIRDS, BEES AND BABIES 

So if and when you have your baby, there's practically 
nothing left to worry about or fear, except your own 
mental outlook which can't help but be bright, happy, 
and expectant, because wonder of it all, one and one are 
making three. 



79 




CHAPTER 6 



SEX 

CONSCIOUS 

AND 

SELF 

CONSCIOUS 



Gither 'round and give me both your ears. While we've 
established the physical facts of sex pretty thor- 
oughly, the far more important emotional aspects of grow- 
ing up are confronting us, with the involvement of your 
feelings, desires, and impulses. 

If you've faced all the physical facts without mental 
qualms or aversions, then the emotional realities usually 
resolve themselves, leaving you free to go ahead and just 
grow like Topsy, which is as it should be. 

But a lot of us girls and boys are a little shocked about 
the whole business and refuse to accept things as they are. 
To some, physical maturity is an outrage, an injustice; it's 
revolting and degrading. Well, so it is, if you insist on 
thinking that way. But while you're knocking yourself out 
opposing it all, nature goes right ahead perpetrating her 
plans for you in the natural scheme of things. The sooner, 

83 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

therefore, you get over such foolish grudges, the easier 
it'll be for you. Then presto, when all the personal ef- 
frontery you think you're suffering wears off, you'll begin 
to marvel right along with the rest of us, over the per- 
fectly wonderful job nature did on you and for you. She 
endowed you with the right and privilege to witness, 
harness, and duplicate all her handiwork. So unravel and 
say "thanks" pretty quick. For the person, grownup or 
child alike, who possesses a humble gratitude for the life 
he's been given, is the happiest of mortals. 

So if you don't resent sex and can accept being what 
you are, male or female, for what you are destined, then 
you're headed in the right direction. But right off the bat, 
you'll be confronted with one of life's biggest jobs RE 
SPONSIBILITY beyond yourself. For growing up is 
largely composed of fulfilling obligations toward others 
for the privilege of living in society. And as you go along 
in this society, you'll meet all kinds of people. Some will 
appear "different" than you think they should be. And 
some may actually be not quite normal. For sex and self 
pose many problems at puberty, which are often left un- 
solved throughout a lifetime because of misunderstand- 
ing. You'll recognize most of the following problems, and 
we'll try to see how you can render real help toward their 
solution. 

In every school or group of young people, there are sev- 
eral boys and girls who don't understand what is happen- 
ing to them or why. They sense and feel the power and 

84 



SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

importance of the physical changes overtaking them, and 
drift along on this surge of new life. The girls flaunt their 
newly acquired sex, the boys dwell on thoughts of it. Both 
are headed for trouble unless they are set straight. 

You can spot them always. She exaggerates the really 
beautiful figure and features nature gave her. She wears 
all the tightest-fitting clothes; sweaters over pronounced 
brassieres; the sheerest stockings; the most makeup; the 
spangliest, bangliest jewelry; the longest, reddest finger- 
nails. She'll reek of cheap perfume, and smell of cigarettes 
and sometimes even liquor. She'll swear and tell smutty 
stories. Shell go out of her way to create a "fast" look; 
and, of course, shell try to have the most dates. Being way 
above average in physical charms, she unwisely trades on 
her good looks to get her by, neglecting her studies, ig- 
noring all accepted social ethics. Thus cheating and cheap- 
ening herself, shell be shopworn and shoddy with a low 
value sign on her before she ever wakes up to the fact that 
life gave her an extra measure of good things. 

Youll recognize the boy too. He'll be tall, dark, and 
dreamy, with the wavy hair, wonderful physique, smooth 
fast line, and sleek clothes. But this long-lashed Lothario, 
who expects the gals to gush and swoon in his wake ( and 
they do), is due for the low value mark too. He'll run 
with older crowds, date only "women," and anything his 
own age will be kid stuff and a waste of time. Don't con- 
fuse him with the "wolf" though. We'll take him up a 
little later. 

85 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Both these boys and girls are victims of too many 
movies, true romances, and torrid love stories; their own 
misguided, movie-fed emotions; or parental indifference. 
They're not necessarily over-sexed as you so often hear. 
But they are definitely over-sex-conscious. 

They've been endowed with an abundance of natural 
charms, which comparison-wise has led them to class 
themselves apart. So they ignore their own age compan- 
ions for an older crowd which makes them all the more 
conspicuous. Shirking studies and other mental pursuits, 
they constantly seek flattery, vain compliments, and empty 
pleasures as a means of burning up excess youthful ener- 
gies. It never occurs to them to divert their thoughts and 
abilities to more purposeful ends. 

The "wolf," of course, is ever present. Grandma called 
him a "masher" and ran. Your grandchildren will doubt- 
less dub him something else, but he's the same in any 
languagethough more to be pitied than feared as we 
shall see. 

Exactly how he got that way is hard to say. We can 
only deduct that he is a very mixed-up mixture of both 
sex- and self-consciousness, making it difficult for both 
himself and society to put up with. Hell probably resem- 
ble Superman, though sometimes he's a little Napoleon. 
He'll be either crude and blustery or smooth and suave in 
his manner of approach. But the fundamental reason be- 
hind each move will be the same no matter what his age 
or era. 

86 



SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

Underneath that aggressive veneer, he is hiding a very 
deep feeling of mental and physical inadequacy toward 
those about him, and a very real fear of being unable to 
compete with others on equal footing. This adds up to a 
beating down of his own personality with a consequent 
loss of human pride and dignity, which he tries to com- 
pensate by browbeating or dominating others ... as ex- 
pressed in his constant conquests. 

As we well know, the essence of good human relations 
is an even exchange of feelings and understandings based 
on mutual consent. Conquest is the individual pursuit for 
this, against the other fellow's wishes. 

So, actually, if you care to bother about wolves at all, 
you'll discover they aren't really interested in sex, or any 
other kind of human relationship, except perhaps to defile 
it. They're out only to destroy because deep inside they're 
displeased with themselves. They don't really want to 
share anything, because they have nothing to share. They 
can't return a favor or kindness, because they never 
learned the art or the pleasure of giving. 

Thus no wolf is the strong man he appears. He's rather 
a straw man hollow and full of emptiness. He chooses 
sex as his strongest weapon, because of its very personal 
nature and the fact that most normal human beings hold 
it in awe and respect. 

Sorry to dispel your illusions, but now you know, you 
can really relax and feel sorry for his weaknesses. You'll 
avoid his advances too in deference to yourself rather than 

87 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

through fear or protest; and you won't ever be inclined to 
fall slave to his demands through pity which he neither 
deserves nor understands. 

This same sort of basic interpretation goes for the wall- 
flowers, the clinging vines, the gushing goons, and the 
out-and-out creeps as well. For they are the wolf in re- 
verse. Realizing their own personal lacks and shortcom- 
ings, they assume the timid, retiring approach, leaning 
dependency on others, demanding nothing, but all the 
while absorbing strength and personality from any who 
will befriend them. All such inferiority is a dangerous 
thing to harbor within oneself or to be confronted with in 
companions. 

You see further evidences of inferiority or similar emo- 
tional inadequacy dramatized in the kids who try to run 
away from home, injure themselves, or even attempt sui- 
cide ... all in the hope of attracting pity, sympathy, or 
any kind of attention to themselves. They must be shown 
how to get out on their own two feet and learn rightful 
recognition through constructive accomplishment. With 
no great effort on your part, you can help such types of 
boys and girls get over some of their difficulties and estab- 
lish more normal associations, just by setting wholesome 
examples in both your behavior and attitude toward them. 

But let's cover the second phase of sex- and self- 
consciousness, before we turn to the more constructive 
ways of HOW to help. 

At some time or another, you will probably run up 

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SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

against boys and girls (grown-ups too) who really wish 
they were the opposite sex; and are mighty unhappy be- 
cause they aren't. That feeling is quite often inflicted un- 
wittingly by parents who "wish" aloud in their presence 
that they had been born boys instead of girls or the other 
way around. That's a very difficult thing to live with, and 
can leave permanent scars of maladjustment. For sensi- 
tive kids react to that "wish" and first thing you know, 
they're actually trying to be the opposite of what they 
are. Finding they can't, they become bullies, doormats, 
and creeps. 

You all know the girl who wishes she were a boy, which 
is usually just the result of her being the only girl in a 
family of rowdy brothers who have left her out of all their 
affairs just because she is a girl. She can get over that feel- 
ing only if and when she starts associating with other 
girls and is counted "in" on the fun. "Mama's boy or the 
sissy" is in the same class with this type of girl. He needs 
most of all the close association and active competition of 
boys his own age level to overcome that moniker. 

Then there's the group of those who actually seem to 
resent their fate and fight against life, again a feeling 
quite often established by fond but unthinking parents. 
The girl loathes the physical changes her body is under- 
going; is shocked at the thought of motherhood and horri- 
fied at the idea of ever being beholden to a husband. She 
wants to be a man to get even with women for being one. 
She'll usually neglect her appearance, adopt sloppy attire, 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

engage heavily in strenuous athletics, and pursue the sub- 
jects leading to male occupations and professions. Shell 
seek and be accepted by male company, feeling more at 
home in their presence than with girls. They'll respect 
and like her too because she won't expect favors or con- 
cessions for being female. She finds here the "understand- 
ing" we all seek at all times. She should not be condemned 
for it. 

The same type of boy rebels at the role of provider and 
raising a family, preferring the soft comforts he imagines 
go with womanhood. He usually spurns sports for an ex- 
aggerated interest in the libraries and museums, will be 
over-fastidious in dress, and will find his only real com- 
panionship in the company of girls. Poor health, a doting 
mother, a deep artistic or scientific bent, or any number 
of environmental influences may be causing him to adopt 
this retiring, more-feminine-than-masculine attitude. 

But, you, in your very normal way of thinking and act- 
ing, have probably jumped to conclusions and pegged 
such kids "peculiar." They are not so at all. On the surface 
they may appear to be. Actually, they are momentarily 
socially distraught and therefore very emotionally self- 
conscious. In constantly denying themselves the company 
of their own sexes, such boys and girls are both bound to 
have trouble adjusting to their normal roles of man- and 
womanhood in later years; unless, of course, their mental 
outlooks are radically changed. Never, never be cruel to 
them. Ridicule and taunts can't help them a bit. 

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SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

And now, unlike Mark Twain's memorable weather re- 
mark: "Everybody talks about it, but nobody ever does 
anything," there is plenty you can DO to help them help 
themselves. 

Every boy and girl falling into any of the foregoing 
classifications is on the fringe of desperation. They're 
floundering in their own very insecure worlds against 
the contrasts of your very snug one. They're well on the 
way to becoming social misfits and outcasts for life. All 
those unnatural attitudes and poses they adopt are straws 
to keep them afloat a little longer. The fact they don't holler 
out for help, doesn't mean you can't toss them a lif eline. 

Social security (not the kind deducted from dad's in- 
come) is an essential requisite to every human life. That 
inside-yourself feeling that you "belong" where you are; 
that you're wanted because you're YOU; that the things 
you do for others are appreciated because YOU did them 
that's social security. Without it we're pretty sick chicks. 

Kids like these are without it. But just how, you ask, 
can their sorry states possibly concern you who are so 
socially solid? 

The answer to that is obviously simple. You have to live 
in the world with all kinds of people. If the creeps, the 
wolves, the clinging vines, the bullies, and the goons 
began to outnumber the normal, healthy folks, we'd all be 
sunk. It becomes therefore a social obligation to self and 
others to see that they don't. Well, what are we waiting for? 

Boys: instead of trying to keep the wolves away from 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

your best girl's door, show 'em how to get a girl of their 
own. 

Girls: instead of deriding the wallflowers, drag 'em 
along to the powder room, dust on some glamor, and pass 
along some know-how for snaring a man. 

All of you: go pick out one of the kids in your own 
classes who obviously feels "left out" of everything. Make 
him your own personal problem, with making him "be- 
long" your sincere goal. And I don't mean dash up and 
declare yourself his savior that would only push him 
further into his shell. You must infiltrate subtly into his 
confidence which takes no little doing. You'll be Dick 
Tracy, bulldog, and saint in one to achieve it. 

Keep your eye on your charge. Learn his little miseries 
and play FBI till you find what ails him. Overlook his 
bold braggadocio that's a fake front behind which to 
hide his hopelessness. Be on hand to stick up for him 
when others start to pick on him. Hell resent you at first. 
But persevere, Jackson! He'll soon come to depend on 
your presence when trouble brews; and by always being 
there, you'll win his confidence. Just don't let him down 
now; or you'll undo any progress you've made. Once he 
respects rather than suspects you, the rest is easy. Take 
him along when the gang goes swimming, skating, danc- 
ing. Include him on all possible parties. Ask his advice- 
it flatters him, you don't have to take it. Make him wel- 
come in your home he'll probably wind up doing algebra 
homework better than you can. If he finally finds a friend 

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SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

to trust in you, then hell start to emulate your actions. 
Which means youll have to set an exemplary pace all the 
while. Is that bad? Youll have a better YOC7 on your 
hands when your job is done and a flock of followers. 

Before you know it too, hell be standing on his own 
two feet instead of yours, taking part in activities, con- 
tributing to the fun. You will have re-created a real indi- 
vidual with a definite place in the sun. Any greater reward 
you can name? 

Then of course, we can't overlook or omit the minority 
group of boys and girls who are beyond our realm of help. 

Sometimes this sex- and self-consciousness is carried to 
perverted degrees in boys and girls who are physically 
unattractive or have grotesque disabilities. Feeling cheated 
by nature, their minds turn inward to feed excessively 
on thoughts of self and sex. They're the extremes of na- 
ture accompanied by extremes in conduct; and are to be 
pitied rather than condemned. Their twisted minds may 
lead them into all kinds of unnatural sexual relations 
with those of their own sex as well as the opposite. They 
are the ones requiring professional guidance for a more 
normal readjustment to society. Just don't ever be guilty 
of contributing more to their unhappiness by snubs or 
sneers. 

And there are the very few whose glandular systems 
are awry, throwing their sexual development in reverse . . . 
the girls who are more masculine than feminine; the boys 

93 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

who are more feminine. They are the true homosexuals and 
lesbians, not responsible for themselves or their actions. 
Medical aid can possibly set them back on the right physi- 
cal track bringing with it the normal mental attitude to- 
ward the opposite sex. Fortunately, they are usually 
blessed with above-average intellect and can understand 
their own plight. Your first duty to them is to stop calling 
them "fairies" or "queers." It's unfair, uncouth to do so, 
and labels you very ill-bred. Just transfer yourself to their 
shoes, and then grow up in attitude. 

From time to time, you may also hear of a boy or girl 
who has progressed beyond the hope or help of his class- 
mateswho is under psychiatric treatment or who has 
been sent to a mental hospital for rest. It sometimes hap- 
pens that the pain and pressure from the feeling of social 
insecurity crowd the afflicted one out of the normal realm 
of reality. He permits his mind to build a protective fence 
around his bruised emotions shutting out more hurts and 
the people he supposes inflict them. Thereby, he removes 
himself to a dream world which pain can no longer pene- 
trate. 

We all have black moments of great grief and mental 
tribulation when we fear life has turned on us, offering 
nothing but torment and sorrow. Magnify that fear many, 
many times over and measure every bad experience you've 
ever had in terms of it. Then maybe you'll be able to 
imagine what a tortured brain goes through. Under such 
a load, any mind can go temporarily out of order. As any 

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SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

normal body can and does break down under great physi- 
cal strain. For the mind, like the body, can fulfill its 
normal functions only under normal conditions. Exag- 
gerated situations and circumstances can make any 
healthy mind or body sick. An emotionally maladjusted 
boy or girl is therefore not insane or feeble-minded, as 
was once commonly supposed. But they are mentally ill. 
The comparatively young science of psychiatry recognizes 
that today, and is making rapid strides in restoring such 
sick minds back to sound health . . . the same as our phy- 
sicians and surgeons restore a sick body. 

Should it be your experience to witness such a mental 
mishap in any of your associates, be intelligent and en- 
lightened enough to look upon it as you would any other 
body ill that might have befallen him. Don't in any case 
be the guilty goon who spreads the rumors and gossip 
about so and so's "condition." You wouldn't dream of at- 
taching any significance to the fact that the same so and 
so came down with the mumps or appendicitis. Why then 
should the fact that he has a rarer ailment, which he cer- 
tainly didn't wish upon himself, be a juicy conversation 
piece? 

By the same token, when that boy (or girl) returns to 
the fold, exercise the same good manners and tact by wel- 
coming him home just as you would anyone who had 
been away for a time. Don't look upon him as some 
strange new curiosity descended in your midst from an- 
other world. He was ill. Now he's well. Help him stay 

95 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

that way. Don't throw up that same old wall around him 
or between him and yourselves, that caused him to suffer 
in the first place. He needs just your opposite reaction a 
wholehearted warmth of acceptance and friendly relation- 
ship. It could have happened to you, you know. The 
ability to skip all such temptations and to squelch unkind 
whispering campaigns about "conditions" is one of the 
finer points of growing up which is supposed to be what 
you're doing. 

ARE YOU GOON OR GROWN? 

Seeing all these things that could happen to any one of 
us emotionally, particularly when our imaginations are 
young and fanciful, should often give you pause for 
thought. So if you should ever find yourself floundering 
in your feelings about yourself, or seeking sympathy from 
others, or indulging in self-pity, for any reason whatso- 
ever, give yourself a good swift kick. Hurry up! 

It's so much more flattering to your ego and vanity to 
help yourself and others out of bad moods and depres- 
sions than to have to be helped all the time. Naturally, 
quite often you'll need a kind word or friendly gesture to 
snap you out of the doldrums but beware the habit of 
relying on others or looking to them for those sympathies. 
Very rarely are we born emotionally weak and cowardly. 
We permit ourselves to become that way by pampering 
outside fears and "notions" that we're not as good as the 

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SEX CONSCIOUS AND SELF CONSCIOUS 

next guy. If you'd just always remember that in fearing 
yourself or anything about yourself or others, you impede 
all personal progress sometimes beyond repair. We're all 
pretty much alike inside and out. And just WHAT pos- 
sibly about that fact can anyone find to be afraid of? 

We'll repeat a great man's classic truth: "There is noth- 
ing to fear but fear itself." That's a mighty fine credo to 
grow healthy, wealthy, and happy on. You can't forget 
how the late President Roosevelt rallied our entire nation 
to its feet during a period of near-panic by that simple yet 
profound statement. It has the ring of courage and a 
sound, sobering effect no matter where or how you apply 
it. Keep it handy. It's a dandy shot in the arm, when 
things are getting you down. 



97 




CHAPTER 7 





YOU, YOURSELF, 
AND HEAVEN 



HELP THE 
REST OF US 



So you're gonna be a hermit and creep into a cave, when 
just yesterday you were going to lead the band or cop 
the ski cup. Well, all right; but creep back over here just 
a few minutes before you head for the hills. Maybe well 
both strike out together. 

Don't let the new physical overhauling get you down. 
Stop being so bashful nobody's really agin you. And 
fellas, the girls aren't nearly as dizzy and "impossible" 
as you keep telling me. Likewise, girls, the boys aren't 
"stupid" and "inhuman" like you say. I'm echoing a pair 
of teenagers I talked with recently, who were feeling as 
popular as last year's skirt lengths. 

Sure it's tough to handle all the new equipment nature 
has just settled on you. You're afraid it's showing, and 
you don't want each other to see it not just yet, that is. 
Give you a little more time though! 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

And if your parents only would. But NO. You're their 
favorite conversation piece. They highlight the new bosom. 
Mom has to blab your first brassiere all over the neigh- 
borhood. And darned if your voice didn't crack againand 
my, how you've grown. Why can't they leave a guy alone? 

Well, 111 tell you it's a matter of pride with parents. 
It's their weird way of showing you off a 'look what we 
brought into this world" sort of gloating. They really 
can't help it, any more than you can help feeling embar- 
rassed and down in a barrel about it. You might as well 
both give in. This sort of thing has been a stock item in 
families for generations, which we all outgrow. 

You're knocking on the big door to independence now. 
It's a heavy portal that must be opened very slowly. Brain 
not brawn is your password. Beyond it you'll find what- 
ever you put there in opening it. In his own barbed style, 
George Bernard Shaw tosses you the lowdown: "People 
are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. 
I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on 
in this world are the people who get up and go look for 
the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, 
they make them." Smart man, G.B.S. 

So quit pounding and pushing that door's heavy. Con- 
centrate on what's proper to put behind it. The adults in 
your life parents, teachers, relatives aren't bolting the 
locks on you, or digging a moat around it to keep you out. 
You just haven't the heft and foresight to swing back 
those portals yet, and they're only trying to tell you to 

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HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

take your time. There's so much of it when you're grown. 
And you eager beavers, too, might just as well relax. You 
can't batter it down either. List and learn all of you. Take 
the tips handed you by those who know. For little by 
little they all add up one day to open sesame for you. 

Parents are people too. They have lives of their own to 
lead; and they're just as anxious as you are, to see you 
happy in your own social whirl and out of each other's 
hair. Only they must make absolutely certain that you're 
on the right track before you take off. You're a big re- 
sponsibility, and a bigger problem because they know 
what's in store behind that door you're so impatient to 
open. Stop suspecting them of sabotaging your plans. All 
they're asking, if you'll take time to listen, is that you 
keep the house rules. This is home, you know, not a hotel 
you're residing at. They say, and rightly, stay away from 
disreputable places, come home on schedule, let them 
know where you go and with whom. Is that asking so 
much? If you'd stop considering them as combination 
warden-supply depot-exchequer, and look at them as just 
plain folks, home would be the best place to have fun 
while growing in, with dad and mom everybody's best 
friends. But it's moods you're in for a long spell now. 

One of the first big things to realize when you're feeling 
misunderstood and sorry for yourselves, is that you and 
the family are in different worlds and worlds apart at this 
stage of your life. Their sympathies are certainly with you 
in yours; although their spirits go wandering about in 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

other orbits. You've only YOU to worry or think about. 
They've YOU, themselves, work, taxes, politics and what 
the world's coming to in general! So that new suit or 
formal or the increase in allowance you're so desperately 
hepped about this very minute seems mighty trivial 
stacked side of this year's living costs. And you remember, 
you DID spring it just as dad was figuring how to meet 
the overdue insurance payment without tapping your col- 
lege fund. So why don't you just attack with tact next 
time and catch dad or mom in a really good mood? They 
have them often, you know? 

And boy, so do you! Good, bad, and indifferent those 
moods keep coming in continuous succession. 

When you feel a fit coming on, it's best for everybody if 
you'll just stay to yourself awhile. Go gloom in your own 
room till you think your presence is fit for human con- 
sumption again. It may take days, but chances are a few 
hours will fix it all fine. You'll remember that you forgot 
to call Jane about that new hairdo you were going to try, 
or something equally important will turn up, and you, 
YOURSELF, will be lost in the rush. I'm not excluding 
you big beautiful hunks of man here either because 
Ouch! when you get a grouch . . . please also make tracks 
from sight and stay there. 

So all right, I heard you. You haven't got a room. So 
beef in the corner. By now, everybody's hep to your "mo- 
ments" and the space that's set aside for such will surely 
be vacated fast. As a matter of fact, everybody has his 

104 



HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

moments. And privacy is a personal necessity at a time 
like this. That "away-from-it-all" urge in which to indulge 
moods and foolish fancies unseen, unheard by anyone is 
vital. You're all entitled to it. And you can all have it, no 
matter how small the place you call home. Just keep con- 
sideration and co-operation in all things, big and LITTLE, 
as the keynote of family life. Set the signals together so 
everybody recognizes them at a flash, and then living to- 
gether can be a smooth joy, instead of the knotty problem 
you teenagers so often insist it is. 

Most moods are emotions turned inside out. And to 
quote one of your own textbooks * : "All emotional states 
are accompanied by corresponding internal and external 
organic changes. The hair rises on the neck of a barking 
dog; the man's face flushes with anger; and within the 
individual the heart changes its rate, blood vessels con- 
strict and dilate, endocrine glands secrete, autonomic 
nerves send impulses, and the whole organism responds 
in a wide variety of reactions." 

So very true. Take a blush for instance one of the pret- 
tiest sights of youth. It's merely the adolescent mental re- 
action to the emotion of shame, embarrassment, modesty, 
or confusion which you haven't as yet managed to control. 
Your mind notifies the medulla oblongata ( the telegraphic 
department in your lower brain) that your feelings have 
been hurt. That information is quickly dispatched to the 
vasomotor center (which controls the blood vessels); and 

Williams: "Personal Hygiene Applied," W. B. Saunders, Phila., 1946. 

105 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

the news causes it to relax, dilating the vessels which rush 
the blood to the skin's surface creating a sensation of 
warmth. All grown-ups enjoy kidding you just to see your 
color rise; so you shouldn't take it so seriously. 

And the awful shyness that sets in at puberty or close 
on its heels is one of your biggest growing up pains. And 
believe it or not, adults suffer almost as much in its pres- 
ence as you do. You hang your head, you blush, you stam- 
mer, you're so flustered you upset everybody else, when 
all we're guilty of is trying to make you feel more com- 
fortable. That's probably one of the mysteries of growing 
up that will never be solved. Funny thing though, the 
toughest characters you can name were just as shy as you 
are now. Get under the skin of any one of them, and 
they'll confide they were as bashful as all get out at your 
age. If they survived it so well, you will too. 

And shyness is akin to modesty, which is a mighty nice 
mannerism in its true state which state Webster says is: 
"One of decent reserve and propriety, or chaste humility." 
It's a state of mind again that too many of you tend to 
magnify to the fever pitch of prudishness. It really has 
nothing to do with the degree of dress or undress you 
might suddenly be discovered in, as a lot of you seem to 
think. Your consternation reminds me of the wallflower 
( grandma's term for the dateless drip ) who was so mod- 
est she even blushed when she changed her mind. You 
swim in practically nothing all summer and think nothing 
of the exposure. Yet if someone overtakes you unaware in 

106 



HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

your slip or pants and bra, you go out of your minds and 
hide quick like an atom bomb. What HAVE you got that 
everybody else hasn't? What makes you think family or 
friends will take more than a passing glance? Snap out of 
it, please. Certainly nobody wants to see you running 
around brazenly and boldly in your birthday suit but 
must you overdo everything? If you're caught short in the 
shower with your clothes down the hall, can't you holler 
in a quiet ladylike manner for your towel, instead of going 
into that tizzy? Really, your carrying on is far more star- 
tling than your nudity. 

When you're not blushing or shying away or hiding 
modestly, you've got a bad case of extreme sensitivity 
which turns on the tears at the drop of a hat or the bat of 
an eye. If anyone looks askance, makes with a joke, or for- 
gets to say hi, you're off in hysterics. Your mind surpris- 
ingly magnifies remote remarks to personal assault and on 
go the waterworks. Or maybe you'll slam into reverse for 
a change and hurl things verbal and handy. If you can't 
count to ten beforehand, simply apologize quickly after- 
wards. No explanations are necessary. Because if your vic- 
tim is still in one piece, he'll know it was all caused by 
your lack of emotional control which brought about 
whatever reflex action you displayed. Youthful nervous 
systems go berserk often, causing the endocrines to over- 
produce their secretions, thereby creating chemical dis- 
turbances which throw normal body functions temporarily 
out of kilter. These disturbances in turn work out of the 

107 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

system in the form of tears or tantrums. And one or the 
other form usually predominates. 

It's best to take your temper out in tennis or something 
equally strenuous; because the oftener you give in to your 
feelings, the more and more they expect of you, till you're 
eventually a slave to yourself. And freedom's the thing 
we're all after, my pets. 

So you see how your emotional adjustments are almost 
as radical as your physical changes. Naturally, they'll be 
governed to a large extent by your environs, your experi- 
ences, and the influences cast by parents, teachers, and 
pals. Aping elders has been a favorite adolescent sport for 
centuries. But actually at heart and almost unconsciously 
we all mimic those whose deeds and actions impress us 
most. 

That's chiefly why your personality does double takes 
these days. A kaleidoscopic composite of confusions, that's 
you. One week you're Madame Butterfly, queen of tragedy, 
the next Grable, belle of the ball; a budding Einstein, 
then Gable. No wonder parents and teachers go nuts try- 
ing to keep your trolley on the track. Instead of the heavy 
hand of opposition, why don't you make with a lighter 
touch of understanding? You know who you're imitating, 
even if they don't. It's all right to stand pat on your new 
views about you and what's "new" in your world, but co- 
operate with the grown-ups a little to make them see it 
your way. Talking solves so much more than that gloomy 
silence. Adults remember facing your same problems and 

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HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

they really can understand the tough struggle you're hav- 
ing to keep up with all your changing selves. Why keep 
hurling defiance, when compromise can save the day? 
Blowing up too leaves such a mess of pieces to pick up 
afterwards. I always thank grandma (my own this time) 
to this very day for her worldly wisdom. When the 
flares went up and the sparks began to fly in our family, 
with all the earmarks of the true diplomat, she'd quietly 
announce: "Sugar draws more flies than vinegar," and as 
quietly decamp to the quiet of her own quarters, leaving 
us all in foolish-faced silence. It worked without fail on us. 
Still does. 

While your personality is playing leap frog with your 
emotions along will come those crushes! 

Sometimes they hit you before you've ever had a date- 
sometimes they settle soon after the first few prove not at 
all what you anticipated. So off you crawl onto a cloud 
dragging a dream with you. Again it's a state of mind 
that's startlingly silly to behold. 

You don't eat. You don't sleep. You walk around in a 
trance bumping into people, falling off curbs, while your 
grades hit the skids, friends desert, and parents go goofy 
trying to figure what all those sighs emanating from you 
can possibly signify. Maybe you're ill and they ought to 
call a doctor. Certainly you're not yourself. And with you, 
it's almost like being in love except that it's so torment- 
ingly one-sided; and all the worse too, because the object 
of your generous affections isn't even aware of your exist- 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

ence. He or she may be a perfectly swell screen queen, 
local football hero, math teacher, upper classman, or pin-up 
princess. But does this secret desire and love of your life 
know you from Adam? If he or she did, wouldn't they be 
more amused than flattered . . . because honestly, isn't he 
or she usually years and experiences older than you? If 
the answer is NO you better have a long talk with the 
folks. And if it's YES then cut it out, kids. It's only mak- 
ing you look down your noses at your very own pals. 
THEY just ( I quote ) : "wouldn't understand anything on 
so high a level." You bet they wouldn't! 

They're far too interested in hockey, skis, the U.N., and 
the latest juke recording right here on their teen earth- 
same as you were before these thunderbolts hit you. So 
get off that reserved cloud pretty quick and ask yourself a 
very simple question which if answered honestly will 
knock your superiority worship into a vanishing meteor 
and send you hurtling right back to where you belong. 
WHAT, ask yourself, exactly what if anything, have you 
and this hero or heroine possibly got in common? 

Their interests are most certainly NOT with math, 
history, or Spanish exams, the coming ski or track meets, 
the last football or basketball score, or who'll be next class 
president ... all of which are vital to your daily wellbeing. 
I'll bet they don't even know the latest jitterbug step or 
the newest swoon tune; or even more important that dun- 
garees are neatly and evenly fringed this year. They 
couldn't possibly be in the groove on all those wonderful 

110 



HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

things that compose your special world. They're too busy 
worrying in their own setups. So how could they? 

And also while you're way up there smooning over that 
super crush who doesn't even know you're alive, remem- 
ber to take a quick look down at the gang and see what 
you're missing. They're busy cooking up adventure, ex- 
citement, and real fun galore; while you're just sitting still 
there holding a big bag of dreamstuff. Don't you think 
you'd better just park it on the nearest star and hurry 
back before your pals all give you the go-by for good? 

So you agree to give yourself up. What next? The dark- 
est days of teendom are upon you. Nobody loves you and 
your clothes don't fit. You can't get cozy with the folks, 
nor they within ten feet of you. Something or somebody 
HAS to give. Not you. And while everybody waits for you 
to make that vital move, because there's not much else to 
do; you all seek desperate measures for escape to keep the 
family peace. Poor mom plays more bridge. Pop takes up 
the best sellers. You seek outside company for your misery. 
Bring 'em home? Not if it killed you. And you snap the 
head off any bold soul daring to know where you're going 
and when you're returning. Nobody's business. Who cares 
anyway? We all do and you know it. But time goes by ... 

Until what's this? That certain day with its special feel- 
ing dawns . . . 

Gee whiz, Joe Blow isn't a lanky goon any more; and 
goUy, Mary's hair is mighty shiny and she's stopped biting 

111 



THE STORK DIDN*T BRING YOU 

her nails. Something's happened all right. The time has 
come when you tuck in the shirt-tails and do your hair up; 
you chuck the prized bottle top caps and begin to lace 
and polish the booties regularly without being told. Tom- 
boy to lady; roughneck to gent all in the same bright 
light of day. 

"Puppy love" sets in and spreads like crazy. A brand- 
new dictionary defines that expression's origin as coming 
from the Latin: "pupus" meaning boy, "pupa" girl; on to 
the French: "poupette" a little baby or plaything; arriv- 
ing at the English: "puppet" or "puppy" also a plaything, 
particularly applied to tiny dog companions which were 
always carried about by the ladies. So we deduce: a fond- 
ness for your newfound playmates the opposite sex, of 
course. 

The all-girl and all-boy cliques consolidate into boy-girl 
gangs now. And it's dates you're after. Competition runs 
riot. Everything about you from this time on is showing- 
personality, poise, charm, clothes, manners. You're on trial, 
both for yourself and your pals. So watch your steps- 
even a slight misstep can be fatal. Be neat, be sweet and 
above all, be considerate of the next guy's feelings. He's 
struggling just as hard as you are to get organized, and 
he's every bit as sensitive about his slips. 

If you've grown up with brothers and sisters in the 
house, this adjustment or transition to opposite compan- 
ionships will come a lot easier. If not, you'll feel it more 
acutely. But the sooner you adopt favorite boy and 

112 



HEAVEN HELP THE REST OF US 

girl teenmates, the sooner you'll shed that awful, shy self- 
consciousness that keeps making life so wretched at home 
and abroad. See each other, go places, hold hands, swap 
viewpoints, talk, laugh, have fun, share things; for this 
sort of early give and take between the sexes develops the 
poise and confidence to see you through those doors to 
adult happiness. 

On the way, boys, take a tip: Don't try to slide by on a 
smile when the occasion calls for a tie instead of that 
sweater you're wearing. Girls are deadly serious and super- 
sensitive about your clothes and grooming right now. 
They may be polite enough to ignore it when it happens, 
but you can safely bet that they'll also ignore your invita- 
tion for a repeat date. What's more, they'll send you along 
the grapevine as unsafe to be seen with, "accept only in 
emergencies." And you'll get many a cool turndown be- 
fore you realize what happened. 

And girls, remember this: Boys think lots differently 
about the female sex than you do. They have an inherent 
respect for womankind and motherhood. Consequently, 
they shy from the too obvious displays of feminine attrac- 
tions. So be guided accordingly. No matter how super the 
new curves, don't over-emphasize them with uplifts and 
tight sweaters. Wear both, of course, but be careful lest 
you offend. Proper flopper-stoppers (I was enlightened 
about calling them bras) are designed to hold young 
breasts firmly yet modestly in place, rather than show 
them off. You think I'm making this up? A good many 

113 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

countries today still require their women to keep their 
bodies well draped indeed, during the war the Army and 
Navy issued special handbooks warning our boys to re- 
spect this custom, born of the fact that a woman's charms 
were to be kept from all eyes save her husband's. 

And all this advice, savvy, know-how, whatever you 
want to call it, boils down to just this: Watch yourselves 
closely and try to be your own severest critic about all the 
unnecessary absurdities and unbecoming traits that can 
settle into habits so fast. Give your personalities a dress- 
ing down ever so often, so they don't begin to resemble 
those attics full of stuff nobody wants or will ever have 
any use for. It's only the nicest things we like to remem- 
ber about people; so concentrate on making your qualities 
memorable, and bypass the junk you'd only have to dis- 
card later anyway. 

Growing up's a big project. One you don't accomplish 
in six easy lessons. You're well past the halfway mark 
now; and your actions and thoughts ought to match you 
in size, if you expect to get through those doors and be 
recognized as an independent operator. And you do, don't 
you? 



114 




CHAPTER 8 



OH, 
WOE 

IS 
YOU 



Saddest of all the adolescent crosses to bear, and one 
that often leaves big mental as well as physical scars 
is ACNE. Very few boys or girls escape it, though some 
have milder and shorter sieges than others. It does seem 
unfair, and why it's necessary no one knows though 
maybe it's just one of nature's strange character-molding 
devices. Best you can do is keep your chin up and know 
that acne does depart eventually for good. 

You may, of course, feel self-conscious over it and plan 
staying home when you want terribly to go some place 
special. Well don't. Don't let it destroy your confidence 
and composure either. 

If you're a complete mess with a bumper crop from the 
start, have mother take you to a dermatologist, follow his 
advice, and apply his medications to the letter. Be sure to 
use only your own prescriptions, and don't fool around ex- 

117 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

perimenting with stuff that worked for somebody else. 
Everyone is an individual case, reacting differently to dif- 
ferent treatment. What worked swell for Joe or Jane may 
just prove poison for you. 

If, however, you're just one of the "regulars" with a 
normally healthy spattering, while you're putting up with 
the unsightly spots and curbing the desire to bury your 
head in the sand till they subside, you can help yourself a 
lot. First of all, avoid being emotional about its appear- 
ance. Upsets only make matters worse, stirring up the cir- 
culation and increasing rather than decreasing the num- 
bers of bumps. So keep calm, stay away from mirrors, and 
steer clear of company that insists on reminding you of it. 

Now let's get an accurate picture of what causes acne: 

At puberty, the sebaceous ( oil ) glands, located in the 
corium of the skin (the layer beneath the epidermis) se- 
crete the lubricating sebum which nourishes the hair and 
keeps the skin healthy and eventually smooth. Too little 
sebum means dry, scaly skin and scraggly hair. Too much, 
as happens now till youth gets regulated, results in a clog- 
ging of the pores and hair follicles, as well as inflamma- 
tion of the glands themselves. Dirt and grime collect, 
infecting the clogged pores and producing the blackheads 
which erupt in nasty pimples and the blemishes we all 
hate so. 

Beside all this, a diet too rich in fats and carbohydrates 
(sugars and starches) creates a sensation of warmth and 
stimulates the sebaceous glands, causing an overproduc- 

118 



OH, WOE IS YOU 

tion of sebum and there you are, aglow with bumps and 
popping pimples. 

Number one DON'T is: "HANDS OFF-NO PICK- 
ING" . . . don't even touch the things, for you just cause 
them to spread and multiply in other areas. Scratching 
and picking make big pores and leave scars. 

Keep your hands scrupulously clean, and wash or 
cleanse your face, chest, and back (or wherever else the 
trouble is) several times daily. Find out from the start, 
from your doc, what kind of soap or cleansing agent to 
use, because every skin responds differently. Some soaps 
may only irritate the condition, if your skin is the thin, 
sensitive type. Then ointments, cleansing tinctures, or 
medicated lotions may be best for you, Make sure, then 
stick to a religious routine in routing the bumps. Boys Tiay 
have a tougher time with them because of their frequent 
shaving which sets up a counter-irritation. Here again, 
check the shaving soap it may be too strong. 

If you're the type the sun favors (it has great therapeu- 
tic value in drying up and driving out pimples for some ) 
get out and get under it or an ultra-violet lamp often. 
Sometimes, though, the sun's an irritant which only makes 
matters worse. Don't take any chances. Be sure first 
whether you and Sol are compatible. 

Salt water bathing is swell for healing too. But pools are 
an "absolutely not," unless you don't mind having your 
feelings hurt again by being denied entrance. They're a 
source of infection for others and re-infection for you. But 

119 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

an ocean's fine and if you're lucky enough to live near 
one, drop in often. 

Hot and cold applications help a lot. Just be certain the 
towel or wash cloth you do the steaming with is sterilely 
clean. Hold it right against your whole face, hot as you 
can stand. Steam opens the pores, brings the bumps to a 
head. Don't squeeze them though, even if they start to 
drain. You might bruise or break the skin, which leaves 
scars. And be sure to follow each steaming with ice-cold 
applications an ice-cube rub is peachy to close the pores 
and avoid spread of infection. You can then lightly dab 
each eruption with witch hazel, listerine, spirits of nitre 
or camphor, mild Dakin or chlorine solution, or any other 
antiseptic which is recognized as mildly astringent. Don't 
use anything oily unless the doctor prescribes it for you. 

And girls, it goes without saying: CLEAN powder puffs 
please. Use the disposable cotton pats if you don't like to 
wash them. And don't, don't, DON'T grind that powder 
into your pores! I feel like screaming every time I watch 
one of you rubbing like mad. It's a face, your face, tender 
and sensitive, not the kitchen floor you're waxing. Dust 
that powder on lightly and let it set awhile, then brush off 
the excess with the palms of your hands or a piece of 
cleansing tissue. If you're a pancake addict watch the 
sponges. They wash too, you know though most of the 
ones I see on your dressing table look and smell like a new 
batch of penicillin culture. 

And boys, keep your razors sterilely clean before and 

120 



OH, WOE IS YOU 

after shaving. Don't lend or borrow one either. And that 
goes for the powder puffs too. 

A very good thing to bear in mind is: Those bumps 
don't show to others nearly as much as you imagine they 
do. Because you are extra conscious and sensitive of them, 
you may feel they look big as all outdoors. They aren't 
pretty; none of us likes to even see them, much less have 
them. Medical science is doing lots to straighten them out 
in the way of new treatments and diet; and perhaps, 
someday, acne won't even be a part of growing up. But 
until then, there isn't much more you can do. 

Another thing: don't be alarmed at every skin-rash that 
breaks out on your body. Things like summer rashes, 
prickly heat, eczema, and the like often break out in the 
most sensitive regions of the body, including the area be- 
tween the legs and around the genital organs. Here's an- 
other time when prompt medical advice can steer you 
straight and lay to rest any of your imaginary fears and 
fancies. 

Along with acne and coming from the same source the 
over-activated sebaceous glands are the body odors, some- 
times particularly strong and oft-times offensive, during 
puberty. It's some more of that same glandular adjustment 
underway; and it is embarrassing while it lasts. There's 
not much prevention or escape from this either, save time, 
which gradually adjusts your chemical balance. Extreme 
cleanliness is a must. 

Bathe and shower as often as you can morning and 

121 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

night, if possible. For soap and water wash away the unc- 
tuous deposits and impurities of the pores which, meeting 
with a normal amount of perspiration, cause the odors. 
Afterwards, get the habit (it's good to make it perma- 
nent) of applying a good, clean-scented cologne or talcum 
powder all over you. Don't use it just to cover up the 
smells, but only after your bath or shower. And be sure to 
change your underclothing daily. 

Excessive perspiration is another distressing teenster 
problem. It ruins clothing and good times with equal fa- 
tality. And it crops out in all the worst places the palms 
of your hands, making them exempt from holding; the 
soles of your feet, making sox smelly; around your hair- 
line, undoing curls; and mostly underarms, leaving deep 
dark circles of unloveliness. 

Now perspiring is a very necessary body function; and 
the sudoriferous (sweat) glands are abundantly scattered 
over the entire skin's surface, being largest and most nu- 
merous in the aforementioned places. Aside from carrying 
away waste matters, perspiring provides the body with its 
only means of heat loss by evaporation. It is actually a re- 
flex action, which regulates body temperature, keeping it 
in proper balance with external conditions. For instance, 
when the thermometer outside or the blood temperature 
inside is raised, impulses stir in the skin's sense organs 
causing a secretion of sweat and a dilatation of the pores 
to release it, so that a greater volume of blood is exposed 
to the air and can be cooled by evaporation of the sweat 

122 



CROSS SECTION OF YOUR SKIN 




CLEARLMER 

PIGMENTDCELL 

EPIDERMIS 



OIL DUCT 
OIL GLAND-- 
HAIR SHAFT 

DUCT OF 



DERMtS 

HAIR RAISING 
MUSCLE 

SWEATGLAND- 

HAIR ROOT 

PAPILLA 
OF HAIR 

ARTERY 



fATTY LAYER 
NBRVE 



When the secretions of these two meet, make tracks for 
the nearest shower and lay on the lather. 



OH, WOE IS YOU 

Excitement, anger, over-activity, any emotion or increase 
of energy which raises the blood temperature, will bring 
out the drip in you. Of course, you'll perspire till you die, 
especially in hot weather, no matter what your age. But 
the now-too-frequent emotional binges, the nervous out- 
bursts and extreme activity of youth, keep perspiration 
most profuse. So it's up to you to provide the thermostatic 
control for your own comfort's sake. Perspiration may or 
may not be odorous. The amount of sebum mixing with it 
(see above) creates the objectionable odors, which may 
also be partially influenced by the foods you eat. 

Extreme cleanliness in cases of extreme perspiration 
helps. Colognes and talcs applied, again not to disguise 
but to freshen, cool you off and make you feel better, and 
fortunately, there are lots of very good deodorants and 
perspirants on the market which do help neutralize odors 
and seal the pores, routing the more copious flows of per- 
spiration from underarms to other sections of the skin for 
outlet. They're safe, thanks to our Pure Food Act's con- 
stant analysis of products to keep them up to standard; 
and most are fairly effective and will protect your clothes, 
if carefully and properly applied. But if you're a walking 
waterworks, better trot to the doc. He can fix you up a 
much stronger prescription than any you'll buy already 
bottled, and can also regulate your diet and restrict your 
fluid intake without harm to your system. 

Watch your underclothing and sox religiously. Stale 
perspiration has a particularly disagreeable odor all its 

125 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

own, so never, never wear the same things twice in a row 
without first rinsing them out. Count to ten before bump- 
ing "accidently" into that new crush. It'll lower your blood 
pressure, and keep you cooler for the actual encounter. 

Bad breath is another thing to carefully guard against. 
And please don't fly off the hook or be offended if your 
best friend tells you about it. Rather be grateful and do 
the same for him. It's a thing that usually does have to be 
pointed out, because it's so close to you, you don't realize 
you have it. Just to always be safe and extra sure, brush 
your teeth conscientiously several times a day, rotating 
the brushes, for odor can and usually does come from bits 
of decaying foods lodged between the teeth. Mouth 
washes are fine for flavor and leave a nice, tasty after- 
glow, but they never cover up the real facts. 

Another common cause of bad breath is from sour, upset 
stomachs and constipation. It's small wonder that your di- 
gestive gear doesn't get permanently out of whack with 
all the cokes and junk you guzzle and load up with con- 
tinuously. Do watch your diets, and your bowels, and 
please observe a be-kind-to-your-stomach day ever so 
often. 

About diet, we'll say little. You've no doubt heard so 
much already you're ready to ignore the whole thing and 
live on cokes and candy bars. I agree, things can be over- 
emphasized till they lose their whole meaning. Just be 
guided by your own and mom's common sense, which 
tells you that variety and balance in your meals are what's 

126 



OH, WOE IS YOU 

necessary. Unless, of course, the doctor has you on a spe- 
cial diet for specific reasons. 

You'll learn the proper combinations of foodstuffs in 
your classrooms. And they all boil down mostly to this: 
Make the portions of green stuff (for minerals, roughage, 
and vitamins ) equal to or more than the amounts of po- 
tatoes, bread and butter, and sweets at each meal. For 
starches, fats, and sweets all have a tendency to activate 
the oil glands; and at your age, that spells bumps and 
B. O.; and just plain FAT when you reach ours. 

Drink lots of water and drink it often. It carries away 
the wastes in your system, via the skin and kidneys. Don't 
eat so much or pick around like that between meals. 
Substitute milk or a fruit juice for some of those cokes and 
soft drinks; both keep the system in tone and help alkalin- 
ize acidity, while the latter are loaded with sugars. Eat 
an apple or pear or seasonal fruit instead of that second 
candy bar. Raisins are good as candy too, once you culti- 
vate their liking, and besides being mildly laxative, they're 
packed with iron. Good and good for you. So really, you 
can go ahead and eat everything (unless you're in a doc's 
hands ) , but do it sensibly and in moderation, maintaining 
proper balance at all times. 

Watch your bowels too. Constipation makes its contri- 
bution to skin eruptions, bad breath, and body odors. 

Avoid the alcohol, particularly if you're inclined to 
acne. It's stimulating, stirs up the circulation, and out pop 
more pimples. If the crowd is having a drink or two, you 

127 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

can decline without feeling or being a sissy. There's cer- 
tainly nothing sissified about not wanting a new batch of 
blotches. Besides liquor's not for teenagers anyhow. Take 
it easy on the coffee and tea too, for both are mildly 
stimulant. Eat more rabbit fodder ( the greenstuff ) if the 
bumps are a bother. And naturally you'll avoid candy, 
cakes, and pastries too, till your skin's in the clear again. 

Aside to girls: Some of you are bothered by a slight, 
whitish discharge between menstrual periods. That's 
LEUKORRHEA. Don't be alarmed by it. It isn't a disease 
or symptom of one as lots of you imagine. It's merely the 
escape of surplus ovarian and vaginal secretions, partly 
caused by over-exertion on your part. A little more rest 
and quiet is the best answer to it. 

Consider leukorrhea as you might other similar dis- 
charges from the mucous-membraned parts of your body 
i.e.: your eyes which water from time to time for no ap- 
parent reason; your nose which needs blowing occasionally 
even though you don't have a cold. If, however, the dis- 
charge is profuse and continuous, better check with mother 
and see the doctor to make sure that no infection is 
present. 



128 



:::::::%! 




CHAPTER 9 



STOP 

LOOKING 

AND 

LISTEN 



% V 7" hat's coming is probably the biggest DON'T most 
W boys and girls have to encounter in adolescent life. 

It's one of society's "hot potatoes" pitched back and 
forth by generations of parents, educators, doctors, and 
clergy alike. Condemned, feared, threatened, and denied, 
it has never been allowed to cool off long enough to be 
calmly handled. And just because it is an aloof, intangible 
subject, hard to confine in words, we keep burying it 
alive, hoping the ghosts won't hover round to haunt us. 
But they do. And the bugaboo of MASTURBATION re- 
mains ever present. 

We have already defined the word: as physical self- 
gratification. We can also recognize it as a very normal 
phase of every child's growing up years animal or human. 
It springs seemingly from juvenile instinct. Like picking 
the nose, sucking the thumb, biting the nails, masturba- 
tion too is a preoccupation amongst the kindergarten 

131 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

crowd and at the zoos. Sometimes it crops up again at 
puberty and needs correction lest it become a sorry habit 
carrying over into adulthood. 

We are all confronted with feelings about things which 
our civilized existence considers "not nice" or in "bad 
taste." They deserve that label because they are usually 
negative things which prove detrimental to the individ- 
ual. Profanity, obscenity, vulgarity, jealousy, derision 
and all the rest which detract from rather than add to a 
person's character, personality, and appearance fall into 
the "not nice and bad taste" department. As we grow older 
we grow wiser, and good common sense tells us to discard, 
avoid, and bypass all habits which are not beneficial or 
profitable to us. Masturbation might certainly top this list of 
undesirables. But human nature being what it is, we want 
sound reasons as to WHY we should not indulge this 
habit. 

So let's face it and try to trace its bad reputation to a 
good ending 

First of all, throughout our lives we are directed by 
"drives" or vital energies which provide the impetus for 
our accomplishments. They need to be controlled and re- 
leased in constructive paths, else they can run riot and en- 
slave us. At puberty the sex drive is most predominant 
and manifests itself in physical urges demanding release. 
Nature provides adequately for those releases; but the 
mind must also co-operate in controlling the biologic urges 
until they can be put to their intended use. Some young 

132 



STOP LOOKING AND LISTEN 

people, however, become all too impetuous and impatient 
to satisfy their physical desires, and resort to self-gratifica- 
tion through masturbation. By understanding the primary 
purpose and values of a normal sex life between men and 
women, we can readily see that masturbation is contrary 
to life's scheme. Therefore it becomes unworthy of more 
than passing curiosity. 

Nature has decreed the human sex act for the specific 
purpose of the procreation of human kind. That process 
always has, always will, require the reciprocal union of 
man and woman, for only together do they make a whole. 
As we know and instinctively feel, this union is an inviol- 
able trust placed with each of us, which promises the ulti- 
mate fulfillment of the individual being in his children-to- 
come. Thus all sex unions release vital energies (life 
forces) intended primarily by nature for the creation of 
other beings. They should not, therefore, be lightly dissi- 
pated in nothingness. 

Masturbation, being a solitary, self -committed act, ends 
only in nothingness. It takes from the person that which 
cannot be put back; gives him nothing in return. 

At puberty the life energies are awakened and through- 
out adolescence they are used for building strong, healthy 
bodies. At maturity these vital forces are then ready to be 
diverted to their basic function which is reproduction. It 
can't be repeated too often: this requires the union of both 
man and woman. And man, being a rational animal, has 
also brought tenderness, reverence, and love to his mat- 

133 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

ing, thereby lifting it high above the purely physical or 
animal level. And because man is practical as well as ra- 
tional, he realizes the need and the right for permanence 
in his love. Such permanence has its roots deep in mar- 
riage and the foundation of a home for the rearing of his 
young. In order to achieve this ultimate in personal satis- 
faction and enjoyment, we must at all times hold close the 
truths that man and woman together make the whole; 
that alone each is incapable of fulfilling his destiny; that 
it requires the combined life forces of both to bring forth 
new life, as well as to enjoy true happiness through each 
other. 

Thus the physical urges you feel attracting you to one 
another, are nature's way of being sure that you will even- 
tually mate and share your life, rather than live it out in 
lonely solitude. This thought brings us to one of the chief 
emotional involvements inherent in excessive masturba- 
tion. 

Lacking the normal association of others, as anyone 
who excessively masturbates necessarily does, you with- 
draw from the group and look solely to yourself for com- 
pany. Acknowledging loneliness, you conjure up imagi- 
nary associates the fairy princes and princesses. Till 
gradually a world apart is created within yourself a 
world full of false understandings and nonexistent crea- 
tures who are apparently doing your bidding, but actually 
taking over your life. And then the outside world becomes 
a forbidding place, where even your best friends appear 

134 



STOP LOOKING AND LISTEN 

to be ogres. So you begin to retreat more and more often 
to your solitary walled towers. Only unlike the good fairy 
tales, no magic wand is eventually waved that makes all 
well and returns you to the wholesome natural reality 
whence you came. Your very sick self can't let you go 
you have become your own prisoner. You can get back to 
healthy reality but to do so means making an honest and 
determined effort. 

Another emotional stigma hung on masturbation be- 
cause of years of condemnation and DONT'S, as well as 
the misconceptions of its effects, has imposed the added 
burden of GUILT on young doers. That sense of guilt and 
dread of discovery is far more harmful than the physical 
act itself. For feeling guilty about anything only makes 
you more conscious of it and yourself. You become fearful 
that it's showing. If a pimple pops up, for instance, your 
conscience immediately suspects masturbation for its sud- 
den appearance. That's just one small way of how it can 
affect you. Any worry constantly in mind and continually 
thought about, tends to recall the urge which caused the 
initial act and makes you repeat it. Repetition leads to 
habit. 

Thus if we could begin by removing the guilt feelings, 
we would eliminate one of the biggest contributing fac- 
tors to repetition of the act. Once that was gone, it would 
cease to be a big problem; and we would all be free to see 
you just concentrate your full time on the constructive 
do's of growing. 

135 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Masturbation does not, however, lead to insanity, ill- 
ness, or any of the other horrible fates heretofore attrib- 
uted to it, any more than biting your nails, sucking your 
thumb, or wetting your bed could. BUT kids, don't kid 
yourselves. Habitually practiced, it can be a very bad per- 
sonal investment with the entries all on the debit side of 
your ledger. Eventually you may wind up bankrupt of 
vim, vigor, and vitality all the prized natural wealth 
of youth, lavished on yourself instead of shared with a 
lifetime companion. 

Those then are the bad features. Both the boys and girls 
who indulge excessively have something amiss in their 
emotional structures. Sometimes it's a simple obstruction, 
loneliness, self-pity, or a feeling of inferiority that a kind 
word or a friendly admonishment can remedy; or it may, 
more seriously, be some personal obsession that requires 
patient, professional help to bring back in balance. But 
you can bet your best beat-up moccasins that no average 
teen has time enough left over from work and play to be 
more than passingly concerned about masturbating. Who 
wants to hide in the attic all alone to play with his own 
anatomy when the gang's going skating? Not YOU, 

And that's any normal kid's instinctive reaction. He just 
isn't going to be left out of any social doings if he can help 
it and that means nothing short of pneumonia or a broken 
leg is going to hold him back, 

That in itself is a saving instinct throughout all of na- 
ture. Self-preservation dissected would consist of the social 

136 



STOP LOOKING AND LISTEN 

ingredients of self-betterment, self-satisfaction, pleasure, 
gratitude, appreciation all achieved through and by asso- 
ciation with others, and all very RIGHT desires. Animals 
are given claws and fangs with which to defend them- 
selves; but humans, being rational animals, are governed 
by their own sense of right and wrong, which grows 
sharper and stronger as self-respect increases. And self- 
respect leaves no room for doubts. 

A good many of you suffer from that other curiosity 
LOOKING, which also enters many a bright skull at 
puberty. It's that feeling of wanting to compare notes, to 
"see" if everybody else is the same as you have suddenly 
become. There's nothing wrong about that desire for ana- 
tomical research. But you'll save yourself a lot of unneces- 
sary anxiety, if you'll just accept the fact that all male and 
all female anatomy is similar in structure that is, male 
reproductive organs are external; the female, internal. 
There are detailed doctor's drawings in this book on 
pages 37 and 52 that clearly depict the basic biologic dif- 
ferences of the sexes. If they don*t satisfy, then there's an 
inexhaustible supply between your school library, the 
public libraries, and your own doctor's private collection, 
available to you for the asking. But I guarantee, once 
you've viewed these, you've seen them all. The only vari- 
ations will be the artist's individual conceptions. So be 
content to let yourself grow, confident that nature knows 
what she's doing and won't let you down. 

The earlier we learn a high personal esteem and real 

137 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

appreciation of ourselves, and adopt a true admiration 
and respect for the bodies that house us, the sooner we 
establish a deep gratitude toward nature and the gifts she 
bestows. Once that thought is rooted, the rest comes easy. 

Nice body you got there, Jack. Developing swell. Why 
shouldn't you like it and take good care of it? It takes you 
where you want to go; responds to all your whims and 
wishes. It may never win you any academy awards, but 
by gosh, it's all yours; and no law says you can't improve 
on it. 

So you stand up straighter; shoulders back, stomach in, 
head high; and first thing you know, the crowd's looking 
up to you. They won't know exactly why and you won't 
be too conscious of that either but that inner something 
we call self-respect is at work reflecting respect from 
others as well as yourself. Pretty swell guy you're getting 
to be. Everybody says so. Parents, teachers, pals. They 
can't help it. You ARE. But watch out now. That guy 
EGO is right behind you, demanding a share of recogni- 
tion, ready and eager to undo your fine progress. Send 
him away quick, with the reminder that you might just 
as easily have been, by accident of birth, Sally or Joe over 
there with the deformed arm or twisted leg. Or if you 
happen to be a Sally or Joe, there are still so many other 
Sallys and Joes you might have been. Just be ever so glad 
and grateful you're YOU and go on and on turning the 
very best inside you outside. 

Nature always compensates. And in every twisted body, 

138 



STOP LOOKING AND LISTEN 

she has vested a greater gift of talent or ability that needs 
only to be tapped and developed, which will greatly over- 
shadow any deformity. Faith and a constant belief in 
yourself will bring all that out. Professor William James, 
one of the first of America's psychologists, always inspired 
his students at the beginning of each new semester with 
these few simple statements of hope and encouragement: 
"Let no youth have any anxiety about the upshot of his 
education whatever the line of it may be. If he keeps 
faithfully busy each hour of the working day, he may 
safely leave the final result to itself. He can, with perfect 
certainty, count on waking up some fine morning to find 
himself one of the competent ones of his generation in 
whatever pursuit he has singled out. Young people should 
know this truth in advance. The ignorance of it has en- 
gendered more faint-heartedness in youths embarking 
upon arduous careers than all other causes put together." 

Thoughts like those borne in mind don't leave much 
room for thoughts of self which contribute nothing to the 
future, and might well lead to indulgence in dubious 
physical pursuits. Sincerely pursued, such thoughts can 
put you way out front, head and shoulders above others. 
To maintain them, you must develop all sides of yourself 
mental, physical, spiritual. 

Don't let your grades fall in an emphasis on sports or 
social popularity or self. That's WRONG and you know 
it. Divide yourself and activities evenly over the school 
years and strive always for the perfection that is in all 

139 



THE STORK DIDJV'T BRING YOU 

things and yourself. Parents and teachers recognize that 
spirit; and friend or foe alike must bow in admiration of 
it What's more, no one denies a desire to emulate it Hard 
work and a strong will make it happen. 

On the other hand, don't be the "bookworm" and honor 
roll whiz pointed out for your learnedness, not lovingly 
but as one might point out a curio. That's just as one- 
sided. You must guard against spreading yourself so thin 
in any one direction that you've nothing left over for fun 
and others. 

Arthur Murray, once a shy, nose-in-a-book scholar, 
realized he was fast becoming a social flop and learned to 
dance. Then he remembered all the others in his same 
boat and borrowed money enough to start a mail-order 
dance course, so they could benefit too. He found a for- 
tune in their social successes, and became world renowned 
via the ballroom. He didn't do that sitting around brood- 
ing about his popularity or lack of it. 

Moral of this whole chapter??? 

It took two to make you why try to change the scheme 
of things all by yourself? 



140 




CHAPTER 10 



THOUSAND 
TIMES 



"no" 



I feel a sermon coming on. Ill make it brief, you make 
it stick. 

This is serious business, not lightly broached. It comes 
under the heading of the Right and Wrong Department. 
YouVe heard a lot about it already; you'll be expected to 
apply it from now on. The world calls it MORALITY. 

We can't define it in so many words, nor find it in the 
pages of any book. It's the limitless, unwritten law within 
and without all of us; and it's as definitely a part of life as 
the rising sun and the seasons in their rote, which no one 
thinks to question. It's within your own ability to feel and 
act in accordance with; and up to you to establish your 
own individual set of working principles, ethics or stand- 
ards ( call it what you will ) based on your own interpreta- 
tion of this law called MORALITY. 

I warned you this would be serious stuff probably the 
most serious you'll face while growing up. 

143 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Albert Schweitzer, one of our foremost contemporary 
thinkers whom coming generations will venerate, gives us 
an inkling of a definition in a simple phrase: * "Nothing 
else than reverence for life. It (my own ethics) affords me 
my fundamental principle of morality, namely that good 
consists in maintaining life; and that to destroy life is 
evil." I like to interpret his "life" as living and the finer 
things that living covers. 

Borrow THAT as your basis, or the equally practical 
and practicable Golden Rule of "Do Unto Others." Both 
imply selflessness, while retaining completely selfish self- 
respect, which is instinctive. The "good" you do unto 
someone else is your own version of "good" rather than 
his and it must therefore reflect back to you accordingly. 

Naturally none of this profoundness applies to your 
daily dilemmas, such as: you love your blue dress better 
than the green one, but it looks best on Jane; and which 
one will you lend her? Or shall you take Judy or June to 
the dance? Go ahead and stew over these things blissfully. 
Whichever you decide makes no never mind ten years 
from now, or even tomorrow. 

It's WHAT you and Jane do in those dresses and with 
the partner that matters, and where the doing leads you 
that counts. You'll ask each other's advice plenty about 
dates, where to go, what to do, how to act with so and so; 
but the YOU in you supplies the answers before you ask 

* George Seaver, "Albert Schweitzer, The Man and His Mind," Harper, 
New York, 1947. 

144 



A THOUSAND TIMES "NO" 

the questions; and what really happens afterwards, no- 
body but those involved ever knows. 

What all of you fail to realize is that it takes two people 
to make one date. And the same date with different mates 
makes all the difference in the world. So we get right back 
to Y-O-U as the basic ingredient in any given formula. 
You can't possibly duplicate any one else's plan for suc- 
cess; nor can you expect everyone to react or respond 
identically to your ideal idea. What works on and for 
one guy, won't work at all with the next. Get me straight 
now: I'm not saying you won't adapt many of the very 
swell rules laid down by your pals to suit your own pur- 
poses. I'm saying that once you adopt them, they become 
YOURS because you will have put a slightly different in- 
terpretation on them and adjusted them to your own way 
of thinking. They're YOURS then by virtue of your "rev- 
erence for life." 

That's why mom and dad and teachers all stress Va- 
riety in your life right now. Variety of thought, variety of 
exposure to the principles of others, variety of dates and 
friends and hobbies. Because from each of them you'll 
choose the good things to add to yourself. 

Since this isn't a philosophy or guide to manners, well 
get back to the facts of life and dwell exclusively on your 
sex conduct, which also emanates from the same princi- 
ples of right and wrong, good and bad , . . again your 
"reverence for life/' 

Kissing, embracing, and petting are due right now to 

145 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

become a big issue in your life. You can't afford to be in- 
different about any of the three. 

Kissing's a mighty fine thing with a definite place in 
everyone's love life. Once, it was a spontaneous form of 
self-expression denoting genuine affection or devotion. As 
such, it is still a very nice custom. But the relatives and 
the girls who call each other "dahling" and don't mean it, 
got hold of the idea as a form of social greeting and really 
botched it up. So that now the peck you get on the cheek or 
brow from them is about as inspired with feeling as the 
cold "spaghetti worm" you're made to touch during initi- 
ations. They've turned it into one of those absurdly mean- 
ingless habits, which ought to be abolished. Since that's 
the kind of kissing you're familiar with, by the time you 
get around to kissing on your own, the whole idea seems 
pretty blotto and you'll have none of it, thanks. 

So, all right, don't. But you'll mellow in due time and 
one bright, moonlit night you'll wholeheartedly endorse it 
as a mighty good idea. For kissing has many variations on 
the single theme of self-expresison, ranging from that duty 
kiss, to friendship, to passion. The first is the above family 
affair that you're all fed up with. The second is the one 
you're probably in the throes of. Kisses between best 
friends, first dates, those of experiment, impulsive ones of 
joy or even sorrow. But the latter you won't feel for a long 
time, until you've mastered complete control and full co- 
ordination of all your mental and physical faculties. 

The word passion is misused above in lieu of love; and 

146 



A THOUSAND TIMES "NO" 

purposely so, in order to clarify the difference between the 
physical and mental sides of this strong emotion called 
love. The purely physical urges of sex and its gratification 
can be summed up as passion, while the mental feeling of 
reverence and tenderness more clearly defines the real 
love. Passion then is any unleashed emotion, which can 
temporarily control a person, if not kept in check. Anger, 
hatred, pain, fear, desire all are strong emotions which 
can mount to the apex of passion causing one to kill, tor- 
ture, fear, violate, rape, etc. It's a frenzied state of mind 
to be guarded against at all times, for it's emotional stabil- 
ity that produces tranquility and renders us easy and nice 
to live with. And that stability comes only through exer- 
cised control of the feelings ... no matter what your age. 
Surely then, no keen teen will be concerned to such ex- 
tent, so ... 

Let's go back to kissing some more. Being a means of 
self-expression, it necessarily becomes a highly individual 
art. It's a part of you, something you "give" and receive; 
never "take." Nice people don't grab or demand or even 
want what doesn't belong to them, so grabbing kisses isn't 
going to be a worrisome item in your date life, if you'll 
remember just that. Neither are kisses something you are 
"expected" to give for the sake of being popular. 

The feeling that prompts any action is what really mat- 
ters. And intense feelings (your true emotions, wise and 
mature) come only with the experience of much living and 
a deep awareness to life around you. How then can there 

147 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

be much doubt in your minds about kissing? To kiss or not 
to kiss is therefore not your problem. It's the girl or the 
boy, their worthiness of such a gift, and your true young 
feelings at given moments, that must govern your conduct. 
After an evening of pleasant entertainment and associa- 
tion with a special person, a parting kiss is most certainly 
enjoyable and even desirable to both of you, if you hap- 
pen to think of it. It will be given then and most naturally 
received, without any buildups or advance signals, as a 
completely spontaneous gesture, 

If you're a boy, don't think a girl will think you're a 
prude if you don't want to or don't try to kiss her the first 
time you take her out or ever for that matter. I added 
"try to" because of what we just settled. There can't be 
any attempts made, IF the gesture is one of friendly, spon- 
taneous compliance, now can there? 

No girl minds being or not being kissed once she's your 
pal. Chances are, she'll appreciate you more if you don't 
kiss her the first time out alone. Because I'll let you in on 
a very feminine secret: most girls are scared stiff at the 
thought of being kissed for the first time! Besides you'll 
probably both be too busy getting better acquainted and 
having fun to bother much over kisses. There's plenty of 
time ahead for all that; and girls are usually more uncon- 
cerned or devoid of thought on that matter than boys. 
Some, of course, will indicate a desire or even demand to 
be kissed. But it's forever your privilege, boys, to decline. 

Something else important needs settling right here 

148 



A THOUSAND TIMES ".NO" 

though: Lots of girls sit home moping around for lack of 
dates. A state they attribute to their own rigid mainte- 
nance of "decent" morals. We don't believe that's the rea- 
son they're undated at all. Neither do their friends. 

Boys by nature, facts and statistics prove it, are a lot less 
aggressive than girls. They don't get "fresh" unless a girl 
provokes a "pass." What happens after that is a lot of dif- 
ferent stories, I'll agree. But somebody has to start the ball 
rolling. Sometimes it's a suggestive movie, another couple, 
an off-color joke, but whatever: even then the most wolf- 
ish wolf gives up when his prey won't play. That doesn't 
mean though, girls, that you have to deliver a tirade or 
slap his face to defend your virtue. Merely employ a little 
ladylike reserve and the light touch. This is straight from 
the mouths of some of the most popular teen queens I've 
yet met: "It takes two enthusiastic participants" "No boy 
stays interested long in a one-sided game" "Any boy's 
ardor will cool when he meets with friendly resistance." 
And vice versa: the boys state they stay chaste when 
chased. 

No siree, the girls high on date lists and always in de- 
mand are not the "smoochers." So kids, and this includes 
both sexes, if you're unpopular with the crowd and each 
other, better think up a newer, less corny, alibi with which 
to excuse yourselves. But better still, develop some solid 
date-bait personalities. 

Be interested if you expect to be interesting. Be fun to 
be with, if you'd have fun. Forget Y-O-U, and concentrate 

149 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

on making your date comfortable put his or her enjoy- 
ment ahead of your own. Talk plenty, only if you have 
something sharp to contribute. . . . And I don't mean gos- 
sip, that just hangs a danger sign on you, and makes any- 
body afraid to confide in you. Ask questions and LISTEN 
if you're out of conversation. Good ears lend a lot of charm 
and oft-times turn a dull companion into a lifelong friend. 
Also girls: Don't forget that a boy's young feelings are 
much more quickly aroused than yours. Therefore, it's 
never nice, nor wise, nor very sporting, to tease or lure 
your escort into a tempting situation with a flirting, come- 
on attitude; and then laugh or yap him out of it, or try to 
prove that your virtue is above reproach by playing of- 
fended innocence. Smart chicks know you can't attain re- 
spect or dates with such tactics. Play it fair and square. 
Then if you really find a date too hard to handle, depart 
with ladylike calm and precision and go home alone. Re- 
fuse all further dates with him too, even though he prof- 
fers apologies. Whatever happens, you don't have to be 
putty in anybody's hands. 

If you heed all this, you're bound to keep kissing in the 
high place it deserves; and then, boy or girl, you'll be 
esteemed and respected by your fellows. 

Embracing is another of the spontaneous impulses like 
kissing. You suddenly feel so good you ooze affection for 
the whole world. You passed a hopelessly stiff exam, you 
got that increase in allowance, or the family car for your 
date tonight so why shouldn't you throw your arms 

150 



A THOUSAND TIMES "NO" 

around the nearest pal in a good tight hug to express your 
exuberance at good fortune? You certainly should! 

Holding hands is also another way of saying "I like 
everybody today, especially you." It's a sort of hangover 
from babyhood a kind of possessive dependence for af- 
fection on someone you like a lot. Sometimes youll touch 
hands to express sympathy, condolence, comfort, or for re- 
assurance during a bad time. It's just a nice, affectionate 
attention everybody likes. An excessive or promiscuous 
laying on of hands, though, is far from good taste, or de- 
sirable, and never likely to be appreciated by anyone at 
any time. So, if you would be popular as a boy or girl 
friend, DON'T be guilty. Petting and pawing are not for 
most of us, adult or adolescent, unless the intent is to go 
further. 

Now you want to know How far is "too far"? 

The answer to that is entirely up to you. Unfortunately 
there can't be any handbooks or rules anatomically charted 
at the stop zones to guide and guard you. Your conscience 
("reverence for life") waves the "far enough" flag in plenty 
of time to stop, as you near a danger zone. Your emotions 
flash a final feeling to let go, giving you a second and last 
warning. Then the next step is "too far" you can't get out. 
It's risky to get caught between signals. 

Play it smart and stay way ahead of both. You're not 
dumb bunnies and you're plenty hep to the difference be- 
tween Right and Wrong. You know darned well that sexual 
experience or experiment is not for you right now. It has 

151 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

no place whatever in the scheme of growing up. Its only 
rightful place is with marriage in the adult world. And 
even there, sex without love is unworthy of indulgence. 
Alone, sex is merely a quest for physical satisfaction any- 
one will fill the bill. With love, and the right person, it can 
and is a fulfillment of lifea foundation for home and fu- 
ture happiness. 

If you're inclined to doubt any of this in the midst of 
today's glamorous confusions, then look at it still another 
way. The weak-willed sap or smartie who goes "too far" 
boy or girl awakes one day with the piper to pay. The fee 
is high, requiring all he has, leaving family, friends, and 
society to foot the remainder of the bill for his sex de- 
meanors. Just how high and how likely this is, you'll find 
in the next chapter. 

Sure now, from puberty on, there'll be temptations ga- 
lorephysical urges and mental desires to test your char- 
acter, along with myriads of glossy delusions to undo your 
resistance and break your will power. For learning without 
application is a useless thing. The truth always cuts 
through, you can't hide your digressions. And hollering 
"nobody told me" excuses nothing. Nobody has to tell you 
some things you "feel" the rightness or wrongness of 
them inside. 

Over-indulgence in kissing can lead only to the dark 
corners and the progressive gruesome twosome stages. 
You probably won't be tempted to waste your valuable, 
busy time here either particularly if your head is screwed 
on right. Because you already know there isn't enough 

152 



A THOUSAND TIMES 

time in the active life of busy beavers for such social blun- 
dering. Ill admit it goes on all around you; but you'll admit 
you're the first ones to point it out as disgusting. And it's 
almost always the most unpopular ones who are guilty, 
and they smooch in defiance at being cast aside socially. 
So skip the lip service and public displays, lest your dating 
rating drop below par. 

Even if you're okay in your own ideas and ideals, be 
careful you don't become a victim of another's weaknesses, 
and allow yourself to be taken advantage of. It can hap- 
pen almost without your being conscious of it. So if you 
suddenly find yourself in the company of a boy or girl who 
insists on getting you into dark corners, hiding away from 
the others, absorbing you with all his or her attentions and 
demanding all yours in return, BEWARE! Drop them fast, 
and hurry back to the crowd. 

Aside from being cut off from all the fun, and dropping 
and being dropped out of circulation, these secret in-the- 
corner sessions are fraught with real danger. For prolonged 
kissing rouses the emotions. Hands begin to wander and 
explore, awakening dormant sexual desires. And first thing 
you know you'll have gone too far to stop. You'll have lost 
control and nature steps in to collect her toll. 

Such petting, brought on by excessive kissing, is one of 
nature's traps designed to snare all of us into doing her 
bidding. It's a beautifully woven trap in its rightful place 
which place as we know, is best kept within the bounds 
of honest love-making preliminary to marriage and mating. 
Out of that place, it's loaded with dynamite which only an 

153 



THE STORK DIDN'T BHING YOU 

expert can handle. Darned few of us ever achieve that 
degree of expertness at any age. 

So what are you waiting for? Hang out the "NO TRES- 
PASSING" shingle on the framework, and leave it there 
through school days and dating daze. Keep yourself to 
yourself until you're dead ready, willing, and able to face 
the responsibilities nature and the world will thrust upon 
you. It's much more fun, and grown up too, to be able to 
look those responsibilities straight in the teeth with both 
eyes open and know full well that you assumed them be- 
cause you wanted to. 

You have but one short life, no matter how long it is, 
and only one body to live it in. It isn't, therefore, very 
smart to mess it up the moment it becomes yours. You'll 
only have to live with "I told you so's" forever after. 

We've tried very hard here to destroy any Hollywood 
illusions about life, love, and the pursuit of happiness that 
you may have falsely acquired. Those torrid love scenes, the 
happy endings and giddy irresponsibilities so thrillingly 
and blithely portrayed on the silver screen and between 
the pages of the best sellers vanish awfully quick, when 
the lights come up and the book is closed. Nobody has yet 
contrived a way to snag one or drag it into the confines of 
his own four walls for keeps. So don't you make the early 
mistake of thinking you can either. 

You won't miss a thing in life if you stick to your stud- 
ies, have fun, and be good to the teen theme of "No, No, 
a Thousand Times NO." . . . Are you singing? 

154 




CHAPTER 11 



TROUBLE, 
TROUBLE, 
TROUBLE 



Draw breath, pets, the sermon's over. We've only to 
sound the last warning and you're completely on 
your own. 

The best of us are far from perfect, no matter how 
straight we try to set our halos. So nobody expects you 
to be angels. BUT we certainly are emphatic that you try 
your best to keep out of trouble, for your own future's 
sake as well as ours. Not an entirely benevolent emphasis 
either; because when you stumble, ours is the unhappy job 
of picking you up. Life is like that. 

You know now how easy it is to slip into trouble, but I 
wonder if any of you realize the full import of that one 
short word, or just how closely it affects everyone around 
you? 

Character, as we've seen, is the product of your own 
thoughts and actions; the YOU that you yourself fashion 

157 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

and have to live with forever after. That's WHY all the 
preaching and screeching we do at you. We want you to 
take your time to fully understand the important things; 
to wait before you pick and choose the things you build 
with and for; and most of all, to avoid greedily grabbing 
samples and overeating before the main course is served 
you. 

We just detailed the fact in the last chapter that kissing 
isn't wrong. It's nice and normal. It's desirable and right. 
Kept in its natural niche, it can cause you no trouble. 
Overdone, it sets you off on a tangent of illicit sex indul- 
gences which may spell only grief for you, family, and 
friends. 

The results of such are sketched in exaggerated form 
from here on, the better to contrast the advantages of 
keeping your personal slates clean. 

A triple-header of shocks awaits the eager beavers who 
insist on turning deaf ears to all adult warnings. They'll 
awake to one or all three one black morn, in exchange for 
the few fleeting moments of stolen experiences that, in 
their immature state of development, can't even be classed 
or remembered as pleasurable. You know them already: 
an illegitimate child; an abortion; or a social disease. 

Of course, say some, there are ways of averting all three. 
So there are. Though you'll do well to remember that no 
contraceptive (illegally sold to minors) is one hundred per- 
cent foolproof. Neither are they healthful mentally, mor- 
ally, or physically. They compromise mental outlooks and 

158 



TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

jeopardize physical reactions. We must lie and sneak to 
buy them; hide and drop from sight to use them. At first 
it may seem clever outsmarting people and outwitting na- 
ture. But in the long run, the opposite proves true. 

Comes a day: The errant girl finds herself pregnant. The 
erring boy is named. From then on, both are social out- 
casts in their immediate circles. Their school may be un- 
derstanding, but for the moral good of other students, it 
must necessarily expel the guilty pair. Both sets of parents 
suffer. The couple themselves are dealt a crippling blow 
by their ostracism, for all maturing characters need associ- 
ation with others for proper growth and development. 
Chances are they are made to marry. Having no basis for 
real love, with not even a mutual respect between them 
from the start, a relentless bitterness bordering on hatred is 
nurtured by this forced proximity. Each blames the other, 
aloud or inwardly, for his present unhappy plight. And a 
child comes into the world unloved, unwanted, undeserved. 
Separation and divorce become inevitable. But that can 
never right the wrong, nor can it erase the harm to the 
child, nor alleviate the mental misery of all three. Not a 
very pretty picture, is it??? 

Of course, sometimes the boy gets off without marriage. 
But unless he's a complete moron, the incident will hang 
like a long shadow over his happiness. The girl may be 
sent away to have her baby; but the world doesn't soon 
let her forget it. Shell suffer humiliation and shame for 
years to come; because somehow the female is always more 

159 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

severely censured than the male. And the man she might 
someday want to marry may not entirely sanction or for- 
give her early misfortune. Every girl owes herself a better 
break. 

For the sake of argument, let's suppose that the girl 
wants to keep her child. HOW could she possibly do it 
economically speaking? (We're excluding the very wealthy 
angle here, and assuming that our unwed mother is from 
an average-income family.) The folks may generously ig- 
nore society's frowns and move over to provide living quar- 
ters; but should they also be financially obligated for the 
quite expensive necessities required by a growing infant? 
So the young mother gets a job to do her own supporting. 
But jobs today don't pay enough to inexperienced youth 
to raise a family on. Even if they did, what of the baby? 
He needs a mother's full time and attention and love you 
can't hire a stranger to give him. Grandma? Should she be 
asked to give her own time, even if she is willing? Is that 
fair after she's raised her family, and particularly under 
such circumstances? Put him in a nursery then, and try to 
make ends meet on the small salary? Neither mother nor 
child can profit from the natural closeness both are en- 
titled to, and they grow apart anyway. No matter how you 
try to look at it, the unwed mother and her illegitimate 
baby in our present social system can't live a normal life, 
A baby needs and should have a home to grow in; a fathei 
to earn his living; a mother to care for him full time; and 
both a mother AND a father to love and cherish him as 

160 



TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

part of themselves, until he's old enough to make his own 
way in the world. 

So adoption of her child is the kindest and simplest way 
out; but remorse hangs in the offing to overtake the young 
mother at a later date. And the child needlessly bears the 
cruel stigma of illegitimacy. Foster parents, adoption agen- 
cies, and a crusade of enlightenment are doing their ut- 
most to wipe out this unfair stigma but it will take many 
more years to re-direct public prejudice. 

Possibility number two: 

An abortion. That somehow isn't even a pleasant sound- 
ing word. And its meaning is far from conducive to either 
health or happiness. The girl foolish enough to fool around 
and get trapped would be wisest to suffer the first penalty 
than resort to abortion. But no, she has chosen this way 
out. So first she'll find some stuff to take which will cost a 
lot of money. But that's nothing IF it works. Only it won't. 

Be assured once and for all, there is no known medicine 
that will induce abortion. You'll hear of all sorts of them 
pills, capsules, pastes, injections. Don't believe it. Medical 
science is agreed to a man that no such medicine exists 
today. And filling your system with these supposed abortive 
agents will only weaken you, might permanently disable 
or even kill you. Blood poisoning, hemorrhages, gangrene, 
heart failure are all readily yours from the contents of the 
bottles and surreptitious prescriptions. And all the while 
nature clings tenaciously to the new life within you. 

161 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

So now our victim is frantic. Got to find a doctor. Tears, 
hysteria, whispered confabs with confidantes, furtive trips 
to dingy, side-street addresses, unafforded cash on the line, 
and finally she's got a deal. And what a deall 

The curette operation, illegally performed by unethical 
doctors and untrained midwives at an exorbitant fee, is the 
last f oolish alternative. It consists of opening the cervix and 
scraping the embryo from the womb. A fearfully painful 
performance. It'll be done primitively with half-sterilized 
instruments, in drab surroundings. No anesthesia or kind 
words accompany it to ease the fears and pain. Never is the 
guilty administering to the guilty a pretty sight, nor one of 
compassionate kindness. Here again on an improvised 
operating table, the same dangers and risk of life are present 
in even greater numbers. There is all likelihood of infec- 
tion from the non-aseptic tools and surroundings; hurried 
and oft-times incomplete performance of the operation by 
a worried quack one step ahead of the law; hemorrhaging 
from internal injury or nervous shock; and no aftercare. 
For hurry, hurry, hurry in and out fast is one of the 
terms of the bargain. The chances thus taken add up to 
possible quick death right there, permanent invalidism, or 
complete sterility. We read almost daily in newspapers of 
women dying in just such circumstances, or in great pain 
from blood poisoning several days later; of doctors being 
arrested and whole abortion rings being intercepted and 
broken up after months of sleuthing to find them out. 
Every year countless hundreds of women die or are dis- 
abled as a direct result of abortion. Is it worth it??? 

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TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

I'm sure you'll say it's far wiser to avoid the causes rather 
than have to face and rue the results the rest of your days. 

Of course, that's the ugly side of it. There is also the 
very legal, therapeutic abortion, entirely separate and dis- 
tinct from the above criminal procedure. This is performed 
by reputable specialists in hospitals, whenever a pregnancy 
would endanger a mother's life or stillbirth (baby born 
dead) seems imminent. 

Last come the social diseases: gonorrhea and syphilis. 
They are so-called because they involve not only the in- 
fected person but affect his family and society as well. Both 
are highly contagious with serious, long-lasting after- 
effects. And both are contracted through sexual intercourse. 
There is the extremely slight possibility of being infected 
orally or through very close contact with a diseased per- 
son, where you'd be using the same towels, drinking glasses 
or eating utensils, or through open sores or breaks in the 
skin that the germ might enter. 

Sometimes boys and girls are victimized by depraved 
men and women the derelicts of society who are quite 
often carriers of these diseases (immune themselves but 
capable of transmitting the germs to others). You can't, 
therefore, be too wary of any older person of suspicious 
character who is ardently solicitous of your affections and 
indulgent with gifts or attentions. They're likely to be dis- 
eased, degenerate, or among the homo- and bi-sexual un- 
fortunates . . . none of whom you want to be mixed up 
with. Of course, if you insist on sticking your neck out, 
pooh-poohing warnings, you're not entitled to much pity. 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

And also, boys, you can't be cautioned too often about 
prostitutes through whom most of these diseases filter. DO 
stay away from them. Gonorrhea asserts itself quickly, 
within three days to a week after exposure, although the 
germs settle down to work in a matter of few hours. More 
discernible in boys than in girls, it is caused by the gono- 
coccus germ, which flourishes and spreads rapidly through 
the moist, mucous-membranes of the genital tracts of both 
sexes, accompanied by a bloody, catarrhal discharge. It 
may even seek growth in the linings of the eyes, causing 
blindness and necessitating removal of one or both the 
optic organs, should infection occur or be transferred there. 
Contrary to much misinformation, this disease should not 
be considered as lightly as it often is. I've heard the ex- 
pression many times: "Gonorrhea is no worse than a bad 
cold in the head." True, medicine has developed quick 
and effective methods for dealing with it, but that is a 
foolishly dangerous conception of this devastating ill, which 
can leave serious complications in its wake. 

In the male, gonorrhea quickly attacks the urethral 
canal, usually causing stricture (closing) of the passage, 
making urination extremely painful, and will be accom- 
panied by swelling and much inflammation of the genitals, 
unless it spreads deeper and affects the bladder and pros- 
tate gland. Allowed to continue, it reaches the testicles 
resulting in sterility. 

It is even more disastrous to the female. From the local 
vaginal infection, the germs generally travel backward into 

164 



TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

the uterus, tubes, and ovaries, causing severe peritonitis or 
deep-seated infection which requires operation for the re- 
moval of the diseased parts. Sterility is most certain to fol- 
low; and on complete removal of the female organs tubes, 
ovaries, and uterus artificial menopause results with its 
continuous ill health and accompanying nervous disorders. 

Home remedies are ineffectual at best and difficult to ad- 
minister. Prompt medical attention, received at the onset, 
can avert much of the discomfort and ward off lasting 
effects. 

Fortunately syphilis, a once dread disease, has been 
brought under rigid civic control. New scientific treat- 
ment has cut its cures from the then two long years and 
more, to within but a few days in many cases, depending 
of course on the severity and the stage of infection of the 
patient. In 80 percent of the cases, cure is complete; 
while with the remaining twenty, progress is definitely ar- 
rested. Medical records are full of case histories which are 
now public domain; and city information and health clin- 
ics issue and distribute pamphlets for the asking, which 
tell you all you want or need to know to stay far away 
from contact with the subject. Frequent blood tests in 
schools and industry, pre-marital tests, and public dispen- 
saries as well as extensive educational programs have all 
added up to curbing and controlling the spread of syphilis; 
and for once, the public has responded with open-minded 
co-operation so that few cases remain at large. So chances 
are, youH never meet it face to face in all its ugly horrors. 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

However, so you can't say nobody told you, here briefly 
is a summary of the three-way course it runs and the human 
damage it wreaks: 

Its cause is the very virulent organic parasite spiro- 
chaeta pallida which advances in three distinct stages, 
spreading rapidly to all parts of the body and eventually 
attacking the vital organs, bones, tissues, blood vessels, 
brain, and nervous system. The first stage is evidenced 
about six weeks after inoculation, by painless chancres or 
open running sores usually about the genitals and loins, 
lips and tongue. They're always ugly and unmistakably 
syphilitic, signifying that the disease is already rampant 
in the system. 

The second phase, and most highly contagious one, is 
marked by a general skin eruption in the form of angry red 
splotches, raised burning lumps, or septic pus-filled sores; 
accompanied by a sore throat and moldering patches on 
the roof of the mouth. It also quite often attacks the hair 
follicles, with characteristic loss of hair. It ain't purty, kids. 

Next, after dragging on for years, it progresses to its final 
or tertiary stage, culminating in death. Here we find a gen- 
eral structural breakdown and disintegrations of bodily 
tissues, fibers, and functions. Teeth, nails, bones, eyes, 
lungs, liver, blood vessels, brain, and nerves, now all fall 
prey to its final vicious onslaught. It is painful only to 
those witnessing it. Putrid guma lesions spread over the 
skin's surface, varying in size from a pea to a platter, laying 
whole portions of the body bare to the bone. Locomotor 

166 



TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

ataxia (loss of voluntary muscular co-ordination), paresis 
(brain corrosion, insanity) or rupture of the blood vessels 
quickly follow, any or all of which usher in merciful death. 

A baby can be born with congenital syphilis, meaning 
that his mother was infected and transmitted the disease 
to him during pregnancy. Extensive skin eruption, stunted 
growth, bad teeth, malformation of bones, mental subnor- 
malities, and muscular spasticism, are forms congenital 
syphilis assumes in infancy; while babies born of mothers 
infected with gonorrhea may have the disease transmitted 
to them during delivery and generally enter the world 
blinded. 

What right-thinking, right-doing person would ever 
want to be responsible for such things? 

And that, kids, is what COULD be, painted extra black, 
of course, to keep you far, far away. It's meant also to 
make you recognize a tacit obligation to society to avoid 
having any such fates befall you. 

The world doesn't end because somebody makes a mis- 
take. It does point a long finger when that mistake is avoid- 
able and foolhardy, as any of the foregoing wittingly com- 
mitted would be. But the world is also a very forgiving 
place to live, when you're willing to plead guilty and ex- 
press desire to correct the wrongs committed. 

And it's time you knew: Parents are the most HUMAN 
people in this world. But they, like the rest of us, expect 
you to use the brain you were born with. After all, you are 
a part of them, and your future happiness constitutes a 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

big hunk of their life plans. You can always be sure of dad 
and mother to stick by you through thick and thin. Just 
don't disgrace them unnecessarily. And if your foot should 
ever slip, please go to them FIRST. 

Fellas: Dad was young once himself. He knows all the 
problems you're going through to grow up. If in a rash 
moment you let yourself get out of hand with a dubious 
choice of partner, it's best to beat feet to him fast. He won't 
like it, but you can count on him to get you to the right 
doctor right away. Gonorrhea settles down within a matter 
of hours, and you've just read what it can do to your sys- 
tem once it does. Treated in time, and that's immediately, 
you can avert serious complications. 

If you're too ashamed or afraid to confess at home, then 
do have sense enough to go straight to your own family 
doctor. He'll keep your secret. DON'T try to treat your- 
self. DON'T let a pal guide you to a quack who'll make 
a production of treating you, keep you coming back for 
more, and scare the lif e out of you in the bargain. If you've 
been wrong, then do this much right. 

And girls, you too: Go to mother right away. After her 
first shock, shell love you just as much as ever. And telling 
her quickly is so much better than worrying alone, and 
having her discover for herself what's wrong with you. She 
isn't blind, you know, and you can't keep a secret like that 
very long. Just please don't ever be foolish enough to take 
any kind of pills. Re-read the first paragraphs of this chap- 

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TROUBLE, TROUBLE, TROUBLE 

ten THERE IS NO KNOWN MEDICINE THAT WILL 
INDUCE ABORTION. That's straight dope from the med- 
ical profession itself. 

And both of you: Remember too that secrecy about your 
troubles or unethical medical treatment of them can ruin, 
not only your own lives, but those of your parents as well. 
Nothing you do is so bad that some good can't still be 
salvaged. Whenever you suspect trouble of any nature, 
PARENTS are the people to go to. That's why you have 
each other. 

One last little warning: If you're inclined to be at all 
amorous, lay off the liquor. It only makes you more so. 
Even if your folks permit you to have a drink or two, and 
I'm sure that's only in their presence or at well chaperoned 
parties, it's best to let it alone. It's tricky, treacherous stuff; 
and very few teenagers could carry it well even if it had 
handles on it. It's gummed up more adult lives than any- 
body cares to think about. So what makes you think you 
are any smarter? 

And a last and final DON'T: Don't be restive about sex. 
Don't believe all you hear about the experiences of your 
associates. It's mostly sheer braggadocio to get your goat. 



169 




I 4 

t 

v.v.v.v. 

.v.v.v.v 

..v.v.v.v 




.v.v.v 
v.v.v. 



CHAPTER 12 



CALLING 

ALL 

PARENTS 



Now you're really "in the know" on everything; and 
you're strictly on your own from here on out. My 
gosh, how you've grown! 

The older folks don't tell you what to do any more. They 
just watch from the sidelines now, rooting for you and 
sometimes daring to offer stray bits of practical how-to-do- 
its which they hope you'll follow. Maybe you think you 
won't need that advice any more? Just you wait and see. 

There'll be times aplenty when you'll even ask for it. If 
you're really sharp you'll cultivate the advantage of talking 
things over with the folks right from the start of dating, 
before any heavy problems can settle down like concrete. 
Because unexpected items galore will gang up to devastate 
your pretty new outlook and throw those fine theories into 
a tailspin, unless you're careful. 

You never hesitate to ask for those extra bucks before 

173 



THE STORK DIDN T BRING YOU 

allowance is due when you're caught short with a heavy 
date or need new nylons. Why not adopt the same policy 
of adding to your mental funds when they run short? Dad 
and mother are swell old sentimentalists, who are touched 
to the toes at being asked an advisory favor. Of course, 
you'll take this advice with a grain of salt but it never 
hurts to check a plan of action with the experts first. From 
the first date till your last (marriage, not the cemetery) 
parents come across. with the car, extra dough, new clothes 
all the help you need to make the best impression on 
your partners. So why shouldn't they also share with the 
heart? 

Now youVe found yourself. You're really alive and out 
of the shell. You're in love with love and the whole won- 
derful idea of living. There's parties and proms and a whirl 
of gay excitement. Dates, dates, dates and then more 
dates. Even too many is not enough. 

I've just watched a teen our next door neighbor, now 
fifteen emerge from her cocoon. She's either never home or 
has a houseful of boys and girls every day, every night. Her 
parents, fearful she'd never have a date because she was 
always so uninterested in boys, are now delighted; she's 
lost weight and looks a little tired, but life is wonderful! 

You can't just disappear to show up spasmodically for 
meals and to go to bed, though, and not expect a banshee 
wail from the folks about seeing so little of you. We just 
went over how it feels to feel 'left out" and discarded like 

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CALLING ALL PARENTS 

last year's fashion. Don't be so fickle with the folksthey 
don't deserve it. They took you to movies and stayed home 
to play cards with you, didn't they, while you were moping 
around dateless? Sure, they have their own social life, but 
you're still a part of the same family. They'd like you to 
remember that and act the part once in a while. 

So gentle down and bring some of that fun home with 
you. The folks aren't anti-social either. And the house, no 
matter how small, is always somehow big enough to manage 
an evening's entertainment and accommodate the crowd, 
however large. You can always throw a sit-down affair 
and rent an old movie, instead of a roving treasure hunt 
or barn dance. Use your noodle. 

Your favorite magazines and any number of new books 
contain swell party ideas for all sizes and shapes of affairs, 
complete with floor space plans and kitchenette menus. 
There are absolutely no limitations or crowding on fun; so 
get the habit of bringing everybody home one at a time 
or in droves. 

You owe this much to both your friends and family. We 
all like to know where you come from and how you look 
from where you come. You'll seem much more like your- 
self after we've had that look. 

And stop thinking mother and dad won't co-operate and 
add to your mirth. Do you suppose they never gave par 
ties when they were your age? Of course they did. What's 
more they'll probably contribute some swell ideas from 

175 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

their store of "how we used to do it." The old is ever new, 
you know look at the clothes you're wearing. And if your 
parents want in on the plans, they aren't snooping. They 
want to meet and greet the gang and then retreat to their 
own room or a movie that's all. And that's just good man- 
ners. Where are yours that you don't recognize and appre- 
ciate that??? 

Just be careful in your carefree partying, that you don't 
usurp the house entirely. The rest of the family has some 
rights to it too. So co-operate and take a turn around. 
Don't invite the bunch the only night dad planned to have 
his pinochle club over or the very afternoon mom usually 
has the girls for bridge. Check everybody's dates enough 
in advance so that nobody is disappointed or has to call 
the whole thing off. Living with parents can be lots of fun 
if you play it right. 

As time goes by, the novelty of all this go, go, go will 
wear off and you'll taper down to less strenuous, more 
routine do. You'U be glad to settle for double dates at 
home or on the town instead of the boisterous mob. Then 
you'll become much more serious about your choice of 
dates. 

Page mom and dad they can tell you. If your date rates 
with them, he or she's okay for repeats. If they object, 
before you decide they're picking on you, the fuddy-duddy 
tyrants, think it over carefully. Only a dope stubbornly 

176 



CALLING ALL PARENTS 

persists that wrong is right because HE says so and you're 
no dope. 

If the folks think a certain companion is not for you 
trust their mature judgment and drop that one. There are 
so many dates in your young life that one more or less is 
not worth a family feud. Besides, variety should be the 
spice of your date-life at first. How else can you know 
what you want without a basis for comparison and value? 

Enlist the folks' help too, if you're having a hard time 
picking dates for special occasions. If they know, as they 
should, all your friends, they'll know whose qualities go 
best to what affairs. Jane or Joe are swell jalopies for ten- 
nis and dungaree dates at the drug store. Alice and Steve 
blend best at formal festivities. Betts and Butch go dutch 
on everything, fit anywhere, any time. It's good to have 
such an assortment of dates for assorted purposes. You'll 
give and take from each other the best from both and 
one fine day you'U find someone you think possesses a 
combination of everything you liked best in your varied 
friendships. 

Parent-SELF differences over dates usually don't develop 
until you reach this stage of deciding to go steady. So pull 
yourself down to earth and listen to them, if they protest 
loudly about your choice. They aren't in the same blue 
mist as you, and consequently from their place on the 
fence, they see better. It's not because they want to op- 
pose or deny you pleasure or run your life. It's rather to 

177 



THE STORK DIDN T BRING YOU 

spare you unnecessary headache and even heartache, be- 
cause some steadies can develop into an awful pain. 

If you feel certain mother and dad are wrong or unfair 
or prejudiced in their judgment, the best way to prove it 
all around is for the four of you to spend an evening to- 
gether at home. The folks will play it straight. Invite your 
friend to dinner and spend the after hours talking, playing 
cards or records. It's the best test for manners, moods, likes 
and dislikes you can name. Sportsmanship and character 
come out in the way a person plays a game personal pref- 
erences bespeak themselves in a choice of music manners 
show up at the table, on arrival and at leave-takinglikes 
and dislikes are unconsciously expressed in conversation. 
Everybody's on his own on an evening like this and you 
shouldn't feel the least bit apprehensive about subjecting 
any right-thinking person to meeting your folks and sur- 
veying your home life. As a matter of fact, you should be 
proud to show off your date and be shown off in your nat- 
ural element. If the folks were wrong in their opinion of 
your friend, they'll be the first to admit it. If you are, the 
reasons will have spoken for themselves. No harm done 
anyone. 

Now, make like the invisible man for a minute, please, 
kids. I want to talk to the folks alone. 

Mighty swell offspring you got there, Mr. and Mrs. Amer- 
ica. You can feel darned proud of your job so far. But it 
isn't finished yet. The kids are people now and you have 

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CALLING ALL PARENTS 

to let go a bit. They belong to the world of tomorrow. But 
if you've done your part well, it's you to whom they'll al- 
ways turn in times of joy and sorrow. It's you with whom 
they'll always share their gains and their losses. That's the 
treasure yet untapped in store for you. It's greater still 
than the wealth of their babyhood. They're really YOU 
projected into the future. Looking at them from now on 
will be like glimpsing yourselves in a mirror seeing re- 
flections of your own hopes, desires, ambitions, loves, and 
hates. 

Just being a father and a mother didn't make you par- 
ents. You had to earn that title the hard way. Through 
love, attention, sacrifice a thousand and one little ways. 
Don't lose it on the threshold of their maturity. In their 
new-found independence they may break away a little. 

But now's your time to be the best friends they'll ever 
have. They need you just as much while trying out their 
wings as they did holding your hand learning to walk. But 
they need now more than just the things money can buy 
the clothes they wear, the food they eat, the schooling and 
allowances are not enough. They need the whole wealth 
of your love and understanding. 

Physically they're strong you saw to that. Emotionally 
they're fledgling you must be their strength. Supervise 
and share their fun, but don't try to have it for them. Man- 
age and direct their dates, but don't begrudge them and 
please, no "in my day" denunciations. Analyze and reason 

179 



THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

out their problems, but don't hurl hysterical advice or lay 
down despotic laws. They're still your kids but it's their 
life, not yours. Guide them still with a firm, fond hand, 
but let them lead the way. 

It's very easy right now to lose touch. You've got to stay 
ever-present though absent. Don't miss any of their life's 
big moments: recitals, graduations, sports, school plays, 
etc. They're vital. Suppose you do have to cancel that 
bridge tournament or an evening with the Jones's. There'll 
be dozens more in your life. The kids are saying goodbye 
to adolescence and taking its memories into maturity with 
them. Life is never more serious than from the teens to the 
twenties. YOU remember. 

All the little letdowns crop out strangely in later years. I 
never seem to forget one such example, all the more poign- 
ant for its light-hearted telling by a young newlywed a 
small incident, sadly remembered. Mary, we'll call her, 
only girl of doting parents with two handsome older sons, 
won the biggest silver cup ever presented by an inter- 
scholastic debating society. She got it more to please the 
family than through love of oratory. So, well in advance of 
the scheduled contest, Mary notified mom and dad, re- 
minded them daily, counted on their appearance at school. 
Came the eventual eve, success over great competition, 
applause, the big beribboned cup no parents. She toted 
the prize home and waited and waited to show it off. Well 
past midnight she went to bed still no parents. She ate a 

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CALLING ALL PARENTS 

lonely breakfast while they slept late next day, and said 
nothing. Two days followed during which a wounded ego, 
pride, and spirit died a natural death and then someone 
noticed the tremendous trophy perched plainly atop the 
mantel. "Oh that," shrugged Mary. "I won it in a debate." 
"Baby!" cried her mother, "that reminds me, when is your 
contest? Daddy and I are coming, you know." 

Mary laughs to tell it now, but she still weeps a little 
with her eyes. Such are the small, thoughtless negligences 
parents commit that leave the biggest gaps in their chil- 
dren's lives. Little by little they break the bonds holding a 
family close and the kids seek other ties. YOU remember. 

Give them, then, just that little more time and attention 
that extra fillip of devotion like the extra candle on the 
birthday cake to grow on. They need it for future reference. 

Come on back now, kids, and let's discuss your love-life. 

Of course, it could happen, though rarely, that two kin- 
dred souls meet and merge f orevermore at a very early age 
like yours. Everything is in harmony right off the bat- 
minds, principles, emotions, even parents all dovetail 
neatly to form a perfect unit for Me. Such perfection almost 
always requires more maturity, more experience, more self- 
aplomb and readiness gained only through varied contacts 
and associations. That's why most parents, most educators, 
most pastors, most psychologists say in unison: "Don't go 
steady till youVe been around and flapped your wings a 

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THE STORK DIDNT BRING YOU 

bit. Get your own house in order before you invite others 
to share it." 

Going steady, after you've had a variety of dates, has its 
advantages. It's comfortable and comforting. You can relax 
and let your hair down without feeling foolish. Your allow- 
ance goes further. You go dutch except on large occasions 
when the man always pays, and her cash goes on extra 
glamour. And from here on lies the trouble. You begin to 
take all that comfort and convenience for granted. Comes 
the inevitable split. One half moves out of town, or on to 
distant pastures, or longs for freedom for any number of 
reasons and the happy routine is broken, with one of you 
lost till readjustment and a new companion is established. 
If you can just go steady with that idea in mind that the 
good things can't and don't last forever except in memory 
then you'll be okay. You're level and you'll fly right. 

If on the other hand you're emotionally shaky and in- 
clined to be dependent on the other half of your team- 
going steady isn't good for you for the very obvious reasons 
just listed. When the bust-up comes you'll bust up too. 
You've got to be steady yourself or going steady won't be 
fun. 

After you've gone solo with a number of girls or boys, 
you are usually ready to go steady with just one. And first 
thing you know you're announcing the engagement with 
but a single purpose from then on marriage. Teens, twen- 
ties, even thirties it always happens like that. 

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CALLING ALL PARENTS 

Don't be blinded by that thing called love which comes 
like a bolt from the blue. And don't try to push just any- 
body into that special dream mold you've been creating in 
your mind's eye ever since you outgrew the fairytale age 
and started dating. Real life prince charmings and beauti- 
ful princesses aren't just made to order. They grow and 
develop same as you. Neither can you make another indi- 
vidual fit into your individual dream pattern. It requires a 
very special person, like Cinderella, to fit your slipper. He 
or she will come along quite naturally to fill the bill, if 
you'll only WAIT. Don't dash out and demand any old 
misfit. In your haste, you feel like doing just that. And 
then instead of the smoothness you wanted, you get squab- 
bling, or one or the other of you becomes possessive, or 
jealous, a nag or a doormat. 

You just can't rush the real love. It happens when every- 
thing else is in order. You can push the physical attraction 
into a seeming romance, but you'll only wind up empty- 
handed or holding the bag and have to start all over again. 

But what's cooking? You can't eat? You don't sleep? 
You're walking three feet above the ground? Can't wait to 
get where you're going? Loath to leave? Those are inevi- 
table symptoms from where anybody's sitting. It must be 
love. 

When it happens keep kie whole thing on the level, 
way above board. Tell mother and dad and the whole 
world no secrets. Don't let anything creep in to mar its 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

perfection. Leave sex and the screen style love-making out 
of it till the marriage ceremony is over. That stuff's good 
in the movies but nobody lives with it. Trying to would be 
like eating steak every day. You couldn'tthe monotony 
would kill you. 

Marriage isn't a lark it's deadly serious business. It's a 
contract for a life partnership; and no business ever pros- 
pered without both partners in there pitching equally . . . 
sharing and sharing alike. 

Remember this when your urge to merge finally comes. 

And till then, so long, kids. I'll be watching and waiting 
for that invitation to dance at your wedding! 



184 



DIRECTORY OF ORGANIZATIONS 

Offering Local Services to Teenagers and Parents 

The following agencies may be contacted the year round 
for aid on personal, social, cultural, and vocational matters 
arising in home and community living. Many are national 
in scope, maintaining local branches which provide coun- 
seling services and/or recreational facilities for both teen- 
agers and their parents. If they or their affiliated groups 
cannot render specific assistance or guidance, they will be 
only too glad to refer you to other agencies in your locale 
which can. Therefore, do not hesitate to call personally, 
telephone, or write to any one of them for advice or refer- 
ence on personal, recreational, or civic matters. 

Listings are necessarily incomplete; but full particulars 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

can be obtained by writing to main headquarters or area 
offices of those given. We quote directly, from their own 
material, the purpose and services of each group listed. 

THE YOt/NG MEN'S CHRISTIAN ASSOCIATION 

A Y. M. C. A. is a very good place to find people who 
are qualified and willing to help fellows and girls think 
through their problems. The local Y. M. C. A. secretary is 
most often a man who has had some special training in 
counseling and always he is sympathetic, understanding, 
and believes in young people. He makes it a point of know- 
ing who the other men and women are in the community 
who are good counselors. 

In every Y. M. C. A. there are groups of teenagers or- 
ganized in Hi-Y and Tri-Hi-Y Clubs and teen centers who 
spend a good deal of the time during the course of a year 
discussing the kinds of problems that are presented in this 
book. These groups are open to any fellow or girl who 
would like to join. 

Many Y. M. C. A.'s conduct regular counseling services. 
While some of these counseling centers specialize in vo- 
cational guidance, a teenager will always find a person 
who will lend a sympathetic ear and give a good steer. 

Space doesn't permit the listing of the over one thousand 
Y. M. C. A.'s in the United States. However, the Y. M. C. A.'s 
in the following major cities would be good places to 
contact: 

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Atlanta, Ga. New York, N. Y. 

Chicago, 111. Philadelphia, Pa. 

Cleveland, Ohio Pittsburgh, Pa. 

Dallas, Texas Portland, Ore. 

Davenport, Iowa Providence, R. I. 

Detroit, Mich. Pottstown, Pa. 

Fort Wayne, Ind. St. Louis, Mo. 

Hartford, Conn. Seattle, Wash. 

Los Angeles, Calif. Springfield, Mass. 

Additional information about Y. M. C. A/s can be 
readily secured by writing to the National Hi-Y Fellow- 
ship, 347 Madison Avenue, New York 17, N. Y. (Tele- 
phone Murray Hill 6-1200). 

Or you will get information and help more quickly by 
writing to the State or Area Offices in the United States; 
for these men are right close to you. Their responsibility 
is to help you. Address your inquiries to the State or Area 
Office closest your home: 

STATE Y. M. C. A. OFFICES 

CoNNECTicuT-State Y. M. C. A., 52 Howe St., New Haven 
iLLiNOis-Northern: State Y. M. C. A., 19 South La Salle 

Street, Chicago. Southern P. O. Box 306, Carbondale 
iNDiANA-State Y. M. C. A., 307 North Penn Street, 

Indianapolis 
MAiNE-State Y. M. C. A., Savings Bank Bldg., Waterville 

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MASSACHUSETTS and RHODE ISLAND Two States Y. M. 

C. A., 167 Tremont Street, Boston 
MICHIGAN State Y. M. C. A., 2111 Woodward Avenue, 

Detroit 

MoNTANA-State Y. M. C. A., Great Falls 
NEW HAMPsmRE-State Y. M. C. A., 39 North Main Street, 

Concord 

NEW YoRK-State Y. M. C. A., 2 West 45th St., New York 
NORTH and SOUTH CAROLINA Box 635, Hickory, North 

Carolina 
PENNSYLVANiA-State Y. M. C. A., 407 Calder Building, 

Harrisburg 
VERMONT-State Y. M. C. A., 266 College Street, Burlington 

AREA Y. M. C. A. OFFICES 

CENTRAL ATLANTIC Delaware, District of Columbia, 
Maryland, New Jersey, Puerto Rico: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 45 Bleecker Street, Newark, N. J. 
NORTH CENTRAL Iowa, Minnesota, North and South Da- 
kota, Wisconsin: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 30 South 9th Street, Minneapolis, 

Minnesota 

OHIO, WEST VIRGINIA Area Y. M. C. A., 40 W. Long 
Street, Columbus, Ohio 

413 Davidson Building, Charleston, West Virginia 
PACIFIC NORTHWEST Idaho, Oregon, Washington: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 831 S.W. 6th Ave., Portland, Ore, 

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PACIFIC SOUTHWEST Arizona, California, Hawaii, Nevada, 
New Mexico, Utah, West Texas: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 715 S. Hope St., Los Angeles, Calif. 
SOUTHERN Alabama, Florida, Georgia, Louisiana, Ten- 
nessee, Virginia: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 706 Standard Bldg., Atlanta, Ga. 
KENTUCKY-State Y. M. C. A., 231 W. Broadway, Louisville 
MISSISSIPPI State Y. M. C. A., Jackson, Mississippi 
SOUTHWEST Arkansas, Oklahoma, Texas: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 822 Texas Bank Bldg., Dallas, Texas 
WEST CENTRAL Colorado, Kansas, Missouri, Nebraska, 
Wyoming: 

Area Y. M. C. A., 114 East 9th Street, Topeka, Kansas 

NATIONAL Y. M. C. A. OFFICES IN 
NORTH AMERICA 

DOMINION HEADQUARTERS IN CANADA, 21 Dundas Square, 

Toronto, Canada 
NATIONAL HEADQUARTERS IN UNITED STATES, 347 Madison 

Avenue, New York 17, New York 

Supplies and program materials are usually available 
from your nearest office. Official supplies may also be ob- 
tained from Association Press, 347 Madison Avenue, New 
York 17, New York. 



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THE YOUNG WOMEN'S CHRISTIAN ASSOCIATION 

The first teenage club in the Young Women's Christian 
Association was formed in 1881. Now there are over 275,- 
000 modern Y-Teens throughout the United States. With 
this long experience to guide them, trained leaders in the 
Y. W. C. A. understand teenagers and can help with prob- 
lems of growing-up either in group discussions or by indi- 
vidual counseling. 

Y-Teen clubs and canteens are open to any senior and 
junior high school student. Members decide their own 
programs. Besides planning for fun, they like to talk over 
such subjects as "Are we prepared for dating and mat- 
ing?", "Boys and girls together/' "Going steady/' Of course, 
an adult club leader is right there to help with the discus- 
sion and to secure specialists for more knotty problems. 
For teenagers who need individual guidance, there are 
trained counselors in Y. W. C. A/s in many large cities. 
Any Y. W. C. A. can direct you to skilled help in your 
community if there is no Y W. C. A. counselor. 

If you are already a Y-Teen and want a chance to talk 
with other people about anything that bothers you, call 
your Y. W. C. A. office or ask your club leader. Whether 
or not you are a Y-Teen call the Y. W. C. A. and ask for 
the help you want. If there is no Y. W. C. A. in your town 
and you want to have a Y-Teen Club, write the National 
Board of the Y. W. C. A., 600 Lexington Avenue, New 
York 22, N. Y. 

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Here are a few pamphlets that will interest you: "A 
Talk With Girls," Alice Collins; "Questions and Answers 
About You/' Tirzah Anderson and Winnifred Wygal; 
"Have You Met Yourself?", Helen Southard; "Youth To- 
gether"; "Youth on Trial"; "Why Not Be Beautiful?", Ella 
Bache. All of these pamphlets can be secured from the 
Woman's Press, 600 Lexington Avenue, New York 22, N. Y. 

THE GIRL SCOUTS OF THE U. S. A. 

The purpose of the Girl Scout organization as stated 
in our Constitution is as follows: 

1. Our purpose is to help girls realize the ideals of 
womanhood as a preparation for their responsibili- 
ties in the home and as active citizens in the com- 
munity and in the world. In the realization of this 
purpose the corporation shall be the directing and 
coordinating head of the Girl Scout movement in the 
United States, its dependencies and possessions, and 
shall fix and maintain standards for the movement 
that will inspire girls with the highest ideals of char- 
acter, conduct and attainment. 

2. The program of the Girl Scout movement is open to 
all girls. It shall be built on educational lines, giving 
girls an experience in making and carrying out plans 
based on broad fields of interest. It shall encourage 
a love of outdoor life and practical knowledge of 

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health. The activities shall aim through comradeship 
to develop initiative, self-control, self-reliance, and 
unselfish service to others. 

The eleven fields of interest in the Girl Scout program 
are Agriculture, Arts and Crafts, Community Life, Health 
and Safety, Home-making, International Friendship, Lit- 
erature and Dramatics, Music and Dancing, Nature, Out- 
of-doors, and Sports and Games. 

Practically every community in the United States, large 
or small, has a Girl Scout Group to which you may apply 
for fun and advice. While their program is primarily a 
recreational one, and includes girls from seven to seven- 
teen years of age of all religious and racial groups, they 
do recommend and refer personal problems to individuals 
and agencies properly equipped to handle such matters. 

See your local phone directory for your Girl Scout 
Troop and get set for good times. Or write direct to: 

Mrs. Lewis A. DeBlois, Director 

Program Department 

GIRL Scours OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA 

155 East 44th St., NYC 17. 

THE BOY SCOUTS OF AMERICA 

This organization is similarly listed in your local phone 
book and offers kindred services to boys from seven to 
twenty. Here a boy learns self reliance, respect for others, 

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scouting, crafts, and countless things that make him a 
better, more useful citizen, equipped to make the most of 
his own abilities and talents. For full details write to na- 
tional headquarters: 

Mr. Urner Goodman 
BOY Scours OF AMERICA 
2 Park Avenue 
New York City 16, N. Y. 

THE CAMP FIRE GIRLS, INC. 

This organization functions through membership groups 
under volunteer leadership. We have three age divi- 
sions: The Blue Birds (seven to nine), Camp Fire 
(ten to fourteen) and Horizon Clubs (high school teen- 
agers ) . The Horizon Club program includes activities and 
educational pursuits based on teen interests: Personality 
Development; Service to Others; Good Times; Vocational 
Exploration; Good Relationships; and Community Partici- 
pation. The older girls themselves have asked for a defi- 
nite close relationship with the younger groups in Camp 
Fire a continuation rather than a separation of their 
broadening interests, but still with the guidance and in- 
spiration of the Camp Fire Girls' Law: 

Worship God Be Trustworthy 

Seek Beauty Hold on to Health 

Give Service Glorify Work 

Pursue Knowledge Be Happy 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

Horizon Clubs get a girl ready to enjoy a good social 
life with the people around her; in her home and in her 
circle of friends. They can fit her to work and like it, at 
home or in an office or shop. They can accustom her to 
doing her bit as a citizen. They can make her ready for 
love the get-married-and-have-babies-kind. This is quite 
a large order, but it is the idea behind our plan for the 
senior Camp Fire Girls. Because it looks that far ahead 
and has that wide a sweep, the organization was named 
Horizon Club. 

Ask your local Camp Fire Girls office for further infor- 
mation on joining and acquiring your uniform and an ap- 
plication blank, or write the: 

National Horizon Club Adviser, 
CAMP FIRE GIRLS, INC., 
88 Lexington Avenue, New York 16, N. Y. 
or 

C. Frances Loomis, Director 

Program Department 

CAMP FIRE GIRLS, INC. 

16 East 48th St., New York City 17 

BOYS' CLUBS OF AMERICA 

Three hundred Boys' Clubs and 375,000 boys, ranging 
in age from eight to twenty, are members of Boys' Clubs 
of America which is devoted to the social, educational, 
vocational and character development of boys throughout 
the United States. 

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DIRECTORY 

Its major interest is underprivileged boys, though in 
many small communities all boys are served. 

Each Boys' Club provides all kinds of recreational and 
social activities; and is much more than a recreational or- 
ganization. It provides medical examinations to discover 
physical defects for correction. It provides physical train- 
ing and athletics. Swimming and life saving are taught. 
Vocational classes develop skills and discover aptitudes. 
Libraries and books, musical and dramatic activities, in- 
struction in arts and crafts, group clubs and Boy Scout 
troops are provided. It takes a boy to camp at low cost. It 
develops ideals of national and community service. 

Boys' Clubs have buildings which are open to any or 
all of its members every week day afternoon after school 
and in the evening. Trained workers of Boys' Clubs dis- 
cover the needs of individual boys; give counsel in per- 
sonal problems; instruct in the varied activities; guide 
boys in behavior and attitudes in a continuous everyday, 
informal relationship. 

Trained, experienced men are available for visits to 
Boys' Clubs to assist in problems of organization, building 
construction, programs, personnel, financing, and com- 
munity relationships. 

These men assist in the planning and participate in 
Area Councils, institutes, and committees of Boys' Clubs. 

They assist local groups in the establishment of Boys' 
Clubs. Furnish information. Organize community inter- 
ests. Make studies of local needs. Submit plans for organi- 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

zation. Aid in promotion, selection of sites, building facili- 
ties, and capable executives. Suggest methods of financing 
Boys' Clubs. 

They represent Boys' Clubs of America in their respec- 
tive regions. Their names and office addresses are listed 
below. 

Specialists collect information, initiate and develop pro- 
gram ideas and projects, outline methods, and prepare 
material for booklets, leaflets, and bulletins. They furnish 
specific information on request. 

They organize and staff program committees of experi- 
enced Boys' Club workers for the evaluation of programs, 
and also establish standards of operation for recommen- 
dation to Boys' Clubs. 

If there is no Club in your town and you'd like to start 
one, for detailed information write to National Head- 
quarters : 

David W. Armstrong, Executive Director 

BOYS' CLUBS OF AMERICA 

381 Fourth Avenue, New York City 18 

Or to the regional offices nearest you: 

REGIONAL OFFICES 
NORTHEASTERN REGION 

New York 16, New York 

381 Fourth Avenue 

Regional Director: Thomas J. Craighead 

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DIRECTORY 

MIDDLE ATLANTIC REGION 

Washington 5, D. C. 
Room 303, Westory Building 
605 Fourteenth Street, N. W. 
Regional Director Daniel Culhane 

SOUTHERN REGION 

Atlanta 3, Georgia 

Room 602, Candler Building 

Regional Director: Frank N. Wade 

EAST CENTRAL REGION 

Cincinnati 2, Ohio 

Room 1503, First National Bank Building 

Fourth and Walnut Streets 

Regional Director: Edwin F. Van Billiard 

CENTRAL REGION 

Chicago 3, Illinois 

Room 682, First National Bank Building 
Dearborn, Monroe and Clark Streets 
Regional Director: William H. Montgomery 

SOUTHWESTERN REGION 

Fort Worth 1, Texas 

508 Throckmorton Street 

Regional Director: Francis V. Thomson 

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WESTERN REGION 

Los Angeles 28, California 

Room 809, Guaranty Building 

6331 Hollywood Boulevard 

Regional Director: Aaron H. Fahringer 

THE FEDERAL COUNCIL OF THE CHURCHES OF 
CHRIST IN AMERICA 

Created in 1908, the Federal Council of the Churches 
of Christ in America is the accredited agency through 
which twenty-five denominations, comprising 142,354 
local congregations with a total communicant member- 
ship of 27,749,967, cooperate in common tasks. It is the 
central instrument through which these otherwise sepa- 
rated bodies come into a united witness to their central 
Christian convictions and united service in undertakings 
that can be carried out better together than separately. 

Although made up primarily of Protestant bodies, the 
Council is organized on a basis broad enough to welcome 
all branches of historical Christianity which are com- 
mitted to the ideal of fellowship and the practice of co- 
operation with other Churches. Since 1938 three Eastern 
Orthodox bodies have been received into membership 
which includes: 

Northern Baptist Convention Congregational Christian 

National Baptist Convention Churches 

Church of the Brethren Czech-Moravian Brethren 

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DIRECTORY 

Disciples of Christ Presbyterian Church U.S.A. 

Evangelical United Brethren Protestant Episcopal Church 

Church Reformed Church in America 

Evangelical & Reformed Russian Orthodox Church in 

Church North America 

Friends Seventh Day Baptist General 
Methodist Church Conference 

African Methodist Episcopal Syrian Antiochian Orthodox 

Church Church of North America 

African Methodist Episcopal Ukrainian Orthodox Church 

Zion Church of America 

Colored Methodist Episcopal United Church of Canada 

Church United Lutheran Church 

Moravian Church United Presbyterian Church 
Presbyterian Church in U.S. 

The COUNCIL is also directly responsible for impor- 
tant leadership in the field of adult education; and there 
are now 635 city, county, and state Councils of Churches 
in thirty-five states of the Union, providing such leader- 
ship for a united Christian program throughout their local 
areas. It maintains a highly qualified executive for educa- 
tional work in behalf of the Christian home; for the fam- 
ily is recognized as the key to training in religion, to the 
development of character and to the building of a whole- 
some society. The program emphasizes the part of the 
church in preparation for marriage, parenthood and home- 
making. 

Many study pamphlets along with suggested reading 
lists of similar nature are issued and distributed by them 
on the subjects of love, marriage and sex behavior and 
may be ordered by writing to: 

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THE FEDERAL COUNCDL OF THE CHURCHES OF CHRIST 

IN AMERICA 

297 Fourth Avenue, New York City 10 
Attention: Leland Foster Wood. 

Or to their affiliate groups : 

COMMITTEE ON CHRISTIAN FAMILY LIFE OF 
THE UNITED COUNCDL OF CHURCH WOMEN 
156 Fifth Ave., New York City 10 

THE COMMISSION ON MARRIAGE AND THE HOME 
OF THE FEDERAL COUNCDL OF THE CHURCHES OF 
CHRIST IN AMERICA 

297 Fourth Avenue, New York City 10 

THE JEWISH BOARD OF GUARDIANS 

The development of the JBG, which is the largest and 
oldest case work agency in the country for children with 
personality problems, demonstrates constant change in ac- 
cordance with new scientific discoveries and the changing 
needs of the community it serves. Through case work, 
psychiatric and psychologic service, the Board provides 
a multifaceted program serving troubled children, parents 
and adults of the Hebrew Faith. 

After over fifty years of such service, the agency has 
set for itself two main tasks: 1 to develop an effective 
method of treating behavior problems; 2 to find ways of 
reaching children as early as possible after their problems 
have been recognized. 

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Psychiatry and group therapy play lead roles through- 
out the activities and services rendered by the Jewish 
Board of Guardians. The purposes of the various institu- 
tions operating under JBG supervision are as follows : 

THE CHILD GUIDANCE INSTITUTE: to bring the best 
available scientific knowledge and skill to bear in the pre- 
vention and treatment of personality disorders in boys 
and girls of all ages. 

THE HAWTHORNE-CEDAR KNOLLS SCHOOL: to offer pro- 
fessional care and guidance to youngsters whose person- 
ality difficulties require that they spend a period away 
from home in a controlled environment. 

THE GROUP THERAPY DEPARTMENT: to help children 
and parents in overcoming personality difficulties and so- 
cial maladjustments through the medium of group rela- 
tionships. 

Group Interview Therapy has been instituted for those 
adolescents and mothers of children who need to under- 
stand their mutual problems and the way they each react 
to them. 

THE LAKEVTEW HOME: to help the unmarried mother 
work out a realistic and wholesome solution for herself 
and her baby, and to return her to society better equipped 
to cope with the realities she will face. 

THE VOLUNTEER SERVICE composed of "Big Brothers," 
"Big Sisters" and Social Service Aides: to help in the 
treatment of boys and girls and to interpret the JBG's 
mental hygiene program to the community. 

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THE STORK DIDN'T BRING YOU 

JBG CAMPS: to provide a carefully supervised, thera- 
peutic summer camp experience, for boys and girls being 
helped by the JBG, in a setting conducive to wholesome 
and happy group living. 

Full particulars on all JBG services will be sent on in- 
quiry to any of their administrative offices: 

JEWISH BOARD OF GUARDIANS 

328 East 19th St., New York City 3 
Mrs. Myra Kursham, Supervisor 

369 East 149th St., Bronx 55, N. Y. 
Mrs. Yonata Feldman, Supervisor 

285 Schermerhorn St., Brooklyn 17, N. Y. 
Dorothy Dunseff, Supervisor 

1797 Pitkin Avenue, Brooklyn 12, N. Y. 
Mazie Becker, Supervisor 

THE CHILD STUDY ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA 

Located at 221 West 57th Street, New York 19, New 
York, the association is a national organization for parent 
education with a workshop in New York City. Among the 
services offered to families within reach of headquarters 
are: 

Individual guidance by staff counselors, under psy- 
chiatric supervision, for young people and to parents 
in the many problems, simple and complex, which 
arise in family living. 

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DIRECTORY 

Lectures and discussion courses for parents and pro- 
fessional workers on practical aspects of child devel- 
opment, family and community relations, including 
such topics as social adjustments, sex development, 
adolescent problems, parent-child relationships. 

Its publications, books, pamphlets and quarterly maga- 
zine, Child Study, have nationwide distribution. Ma- 
terials on sex education of particular interest to parents 
and leaders are the pamphlets "When Children Ask About 
Sex" and "The Technique of Sex Information," and Chap- 
ter VII, "Sex in Childhood," in the book, Parents' Ques- 
tions, by the staff of Child Study Association, revised in 
1947, Harper and Brothers. 

The Child Study Association strives to bring about an 
ever widening understanding of childhood and a renewed, 
strengthened family within the community. Through its 
many services, the findings of psychology, psychiatry, 
medicine and education are sifted, clarified and made 
available to parents and teachers. Emphasis is at all times 
on the prevention of personality difficulties through a 
practical approach to the everyday problems of normal 
children and their parents. 

For further information write to: 

THE CHILD STUDY ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA 
221 West 57th Street 
New York 19, N. Y. 

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THE AMERICAN SOCIAL HYGIENE ASSOCIATION 

This group fosters the organization and extension of sex 
education in home, church and school as part of an over- 
all program of action to strengthen the family as the basic 
social institution. The Association publishes authoritative 
professional and popular books and pamphlets on sex edu- 
cation; issues and distributes films; helps train teachers, 
parents, and others responsible for the development of 
youth for leadership in this field; prepares curricula and 
other materials for guidance and works with individuals 
and groups co-operatively on projects with these objec- 
tives. 

Write for recommended reading lists and other infor- 
mation to: 

THE AMERICAN SOCIAL HYGIENE ASSOCIATION 
1790 Broadway, New York City 19 

THE FEDERAL SECURITY AGENCY 
U. S. Office of Education 

The Office of Education has several specialists in vari- 
ous areas who deal with health education, education for 
family living, recreation, child guidance, etc. 

Specific material available from this Office are bibli- 
ographies on social hygiene. These cover: 1 Books and 
Pamphlets for Small and Preadolescent Children; 2 
Methods and Materials in Schools; 3 Books for Teenage 
Youth; 4 Sources of Material for Children and Youth; 
5 Methods and Materials for Parents. 

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DIRECTORY 

These reading lists are free for the asking. Simply write 
for them: 

FEDERAL SECURITY AGENCY 
U. S. Office of Education 
Washington 25, D. C. 

FAMILY SERVICE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA 

This organization has a membership of approximately 
230 local private and public agencies which offer a great 
deal of counseling and other kinds of help relating to 
adolescents and families. 

It promotes social work through field service to Mem- 
ber Agencies, interpretation to the public, and publica- 
tions for professional social caseworkers and laymen. 

Its primary purpose is to assist individual members of 
any family in developing the opportunity and the ca- 
pacity for satisfying and useful lives. This purpose is car- 
ried out through two major functions, related to individ- 
ual capacities and to community opportunities: 

1. Social case work treatment, available for persons 
needing help in utilizing strengths and in dealing 
with handicaps within themselves, in their family 
relationships, and in environment. This includes spe- 
cific services to and for children, adolescents, parents 
and other adults. 

2. Community leadership in the advancement of edu- 
cation for family living and in the improvement of 
social conditions directly affecting family life. 

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Among the services offered by local family agencies are: 

1) FAMILY RELATIONSHIP SERVICES: Casework help in 
such areas as marriage, counseling, parent-child relation- 
ships, and behavior problems of children, homemaker 
service in case of a mother's illness in order to keep fam- 
ilies together, child placement (frequently through a spe- 
cial department when this is in the best interest of the 
child and family). 

2) FAMILY BUDGETING SERVICE: Consultation on prob- 
lems of financial management related to low income, high 
cost of living, income taxes, special health expenses. 

3) VOCATION AND EMPLOYMENT ADVISORY SERVICE: As- 
sistance to persons in analyzing their vocational problems, 
discovering new capacities, and making use of other com- 
munity facilities for vocational adjustment, retraining, and 
job finding. 

4) FINANCIAL ASSISTANCE: For special educational, rec- 
reational or vocational purposes. Or family emergencies. 

5) COMMUNITY LEADERSHIP: Focussing community at- 
tention on the problems of venereal disease, tuberculosis, 
and the emotional aspects of illness, and the strength 
rather than weakness of seeking help on personal and 
family problems. 

For names of agencies in your vicinity, and complete 
information, write: 

FAMILY SERVICE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA 
122 East 22nd St., New York City 10 

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DIRECTORY 

CHILD WELFARE LEAGUE OF AMERICA, INC. 

This organization functions in cooperation with other 
agencies throughout the nation for the establishment and 
maintenance of adequate standards of work and extension 
of activities in the child welfare field with immediate 
focus on the child and family. 

1) Their purpose is: to promote and develop popular 
understanding of child welfare and of action leading to 
effective community planning and broad support of serv- 
ices needed for the well-being of all children regardless of 
race, color or creed. 

2 ) To promote, wherever needed, a more adequate pro- 
vision of private and public social services to children in 
all jurisdictions of the United States and Canada, and to 
provide leadership where needed to assure such promo- 
tion. 

3) To promote good standards of service to children 
offered by agencies within the League's constituency and 
wherever else the League's influence may extend, assist- 
ing whenever possible those in other countries who are in- 
terested in the welfare of children. 

Write them for particulars of work being done in your 
vicinity: 

CHILD WELFARE LEAGUE OF AMERICA, INC. 
130 East 22nd St., New York City 10 



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UNITED PARENTS ASSOCIATIONS 

This is a federation of 280 Parent and Parent-Teacher 
Associations, with a High School Committee which dis- 
cusses teen-age problems. 

They also maintain Motion Picture, Radio and Health 
Committees, to handle problems in these specific fields, 
and to select radio and motion picture programs suitable 
for children. 

For complete details write: 

Harry Winton, Executive Secretary 

UNITED PARENTS ASSOCIATIONS 

289 Fourth Ave., New York City 10 

THE MERRILL-PALMER SCHOOL 

This institution specializes in education for home and 
family life. It has, since its inception in 1920, made a pro- 
gressive effort to give its students opportunities to gain an 
understanding of children throughout the span of their 
growth and development. 

The Guidance Service for children and their parents 
through the Psychology Department now offers additional 
opportunities for students to understand the needs of chil- 
dren and the importance of diagnostic studies, planned 
environment and various therapeutic psychological tech- 
niques for promoting more satisfactory adjustments for 
children and adults. 

They will accept children of all ages who have adjust- 

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ment difficulties consisting of school problems, physical 
limitations, faulty relationships within the family and in 
the community; and a limited number of referrals can be 
accepted from parents, practicing physicians, social agen- 
cies, the schools and other community agencies of accepted 
professional standing. 

The agencies cooperating with the School are: 

1. Public and private health agencies such as hospitals, 
nursing services and clinics. 

2. Public elementary and secondary schools in Detroit 
and many nearby communities, special educational 
programs for the physically and mentally handi- 
capped, and adult education under public or private 
sponsorship. 

3. Social service agencies such as courts, clinics, case 
work agencies, consultation services, and homes for 
dependent and delinquent children. 

4. Recreational agencies, community centers, group 
work agencies, and public libraries. 

5. Public and private nursery schools, extended day 
care and other child care services. 

6. Governmental services such as housing projects, vo- 
cational guidance, and child protection. 

Full particulars can be obtained by writing: 

MERRILL-PALMER SCHOOL 
71 East Perry Avenue, 
Detroit 2, Michigan 

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PUBLIC AFFAIRS COMMITTEE, INC. 

The idea of the Public Affairs Committee was born in 
the midst of the depression. Then as now everybody was 
talking about America's economic and social problems, 
but few knew the actual facts about them. How to answer 
these problems was attacked twelve years ago by the 
group of outstanding economists, political scientists and 
educators who organized the Public Affairs Committee 
and launched the popular 20-cent, 32-page Public Affairs 
Pamphlets digests and analyses of important research. 

The Committee is a non-profit, educational organiza- 
tion, formed in 1925, whose program is: public education 
on current economic and social problems. Special quantity 
rates are offered on the Pamphlet series covering a wide 
variety of subjects, such as: Family Relations; Youth and 
Education; Health Problems, Racial and World Problems; 
Current Issues, etc. 

Write for lists and order blanks to: 

PUBLIC AFFAIRS PAMPHLETS 

22 East 38th Street, New York City 16 

Aside from the associations listed here which function 
nationally in your behalf, you'll discover if you take the 
time to look that many social, recreational, and persona? 
services are also offered to almost every community in 
our country no matter how rural or urban. Hunt such 
help as you need or want through your local Church, 
town newspaper, Elks, Masons, Oddfellows, Knights of 

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DIRECTORY 

Columbus, American Legion, Junior League, Junior Cham- 
ber of Commerce, Parent-Teachers Association in your 
school, your State Education Department or University, 
and other similar groups. All of them can and will help you 
or tell you quickly where to get help. And don't feel that 
your problem is too small to talk about. Part of their pro- 
gram is to help folks in real trouble particularly if those 
folks are boys and girls; for you are the future citizens 
whom they want to see in good community standing. 

Don't overlook your department store either. Very 
many of them maintain youth and teenage departments 
and centers for both entertainment and advisory services, 
holding after-school sessions on all subjects; and quite 
often staging coke and juke box parties just for teenagers. 
Don't miss opportunities for new friends and fun, by not 
knowing about what's going on around your own corner. 

Numerous "CALLING ALL GIRLS" Clubs are located 
throughout the states too, which are usually established in 
the department stores. Don't forget to look this up. For in- 
formation on them, write to: Nancy Pepper, CALLING ALL 
GIRLS CLUBS, 52 Vanderbilt Ave., New York City 17. 

And another good source of all kinds of help, informa- 
tion, and know-how is your favorite national magazine. 
They most frequently offer advisory services for recre- 
ational programs, teen canteens, school and camp infor- 
mation, career planning, homemaking hints, personal ad- 
vice, tips on health, beauty and the like. So WRITE, 
WRITE, WRITE to them. And don't stop till you've found 
the answers to your needs. 

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Here's a few: 

SEVENTEEN: 11 West 42nd St., New York City 17 
CALLING ALL GIRLS: 52 Vanderbilt Ave., New York City 17 
AMERICAN GIRL: 30 West 48th St., New York City 18 
Miss AMERICA: 350 Fifth Ave., New York City 1 
KEEN TEEN: 11 Park Place, New York City 7 
LADIES HOME JOURNAL: 1270 Ave. of Americas, N. Y. 20 

Maureen Daly Special Teen Editor 
WOMAN'S HOME COMPANION: 250 Park Ave., N. Y. 17 
MCCALL'S: 230 Park Ave., New York City 17 
REDHOOK MAGAZINE: 230 Park Ave., New York City 17 
Excellent School and Camp advice to help you choose 
the right one for your particular requirements. 
NEWS INFORMATION SERVICE: 220 East 42nd St., N. Y. 17 

Some syndicated columnists give teen mail special at- 
tention on health, posture, beauty or personal problems: 
Dr. Theodore Van Dellen: Chicago Tribune-New York 

News Syndicate, 220 East 42nd St., New York City 17 

(health and diet) 
Antoinette Donnelly: 220 East 42nd St., New York City 

17 (face and figure problems) 

Dorothy Dix: 220 East 42nd St., New York City 17 (boy- 
girl troubles) 
Mary Haworth: King Features Syndicate, 235 East 45th 

St., New York City 17 (home and parent difficulties) 
Beatrice Fairfax: King Features Syndicate, 235 East 45th 

St., New York City 17 (boy-girl relationships) 

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DIRECTORY 

Betty Betz: King Features Syndicate, 235 East 45th St., 

New York City 17 (teen advice on most all subjects) 

Ruth Millett: NEA Syndicate, 1200 Lake St., Cleveland 

13, Ohio ( etiquette, home and parent woes ) 
Epsie Kinard: NEA Syndicate, 461 Eighth Ave., New 

York City 1 ( clothes, grooming and beauty hints ) 
Emily Post: Bell Syndicate, 247 West 43rd St., New York 

City 18 ( good manners and the proper social forms ) 
Gladys Bevans: Chicago Tribune-New York News Syndi- 
cate, 220 East 42nd St., New York City 17 (for par- 
ents: child behavior problems) 

So there you are, kids. Get busy and get in on all the 
fun and help provided by these various organizations and 
publications. Look up one of those nearest you and join it, 
or start a membership club of your own. Plenty of blue- 
prints, plans and programs are available, waiting your re- 
quest to be put in operation. Many groups even send 
around a worker to help you get started. If you're en- 
thusiastic enough, everybody will pitch in to get you 
going. The local townsmen and tradespeople can almost 
always be counted upon to donate services, equipment, 
space, and the moral and material support necessary to 
the success of such a venture. And it's a mark of civic 
pride in every community when the grown-ups know that 
their teenagers have a headquarters of their own in which 
to enjoy happy, wholesome fun. So get out and get going. 
The whole world may not be your oyster, but your own 
hometown certainly can be. 

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